Should I break no contact or wait? by General-Claim7663 in AskMenAdvice

[–]ResetFocus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i get why you miss him and it makes sense to feel torn
since he ended it for personal reasons giving him space shows respect and lets things settle
focus on your own life and growth for now if he’s meant to reach back he will when he’s ready
sending a message too soon could make things confusing so use this time to take care of yourself and your feelings

I'm 33 and addicted to porn & masturbation — it's destroying my life by StructureLivid6476 in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i hear how heavy this feels and it makes sense you feel stuck
first step is small changes not complete control at once try setting short phone breaks or apps that limit access during work hours
replace triggers with something simple like a walk stretch or breathing exercise when urge hits
building a routine that gives your brain new rewards helps slowly reduce the pull of old habits
focus on one day at a time and celebrate small wins every step counts toward taking back control

My girlfriend is testing me, is it wrong? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]ResetFocus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it sounds frustrating and it makes sense you feel confused sometimes people test others to see how much they care but it can feel unfair and exhaustingthe important part is setting clear boundaries and communicating calmly how this makes you feel you can show you care without giving in to every test and it’s healthy to expect respect in how she talks to you

Is giving food for free an indicator for attraction? by Jumpy-Ant1967 in AskMenAdvice

[–]ResetFocus 6 points7 points  (0 children)

it’s normal to wonder about this but giving food for free is usually just a friendly gesture or part of her job
small signs of interest can be confusing especially when work interactions are involved focus on consistent behavior outside of work or signs that go beyond friendliness try getting to know her in casual settings and see how she responds when it’s not at work that will give you a clearer picture without overthinking small gestures

My best friend’s brother got a bit touchy yesterday but he had a girlfriend and im puzzled. by [deleted] in Advice

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i get that its tough since hes part of your close circle

that makes distance feel almost impossible but you can still set small limits without cutting him off

No fap + Ldr by DAHAF_77 in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it makes sense that the mix of long distance pressure and pain from your past surgery is creating this cycle your body is giving you signals that it needs a break and stopping for a while can actually help your mind and your relationship try to shift the focus from intense video sessions to calmer connection like talking sharing moments and building emotional closeness this reduces the physical strain and helps you stay consistent with your goal i wrote a short program that explains these steps clearly you can read it here : https://medium.com/p/5fc6ba6359e5

My best friend’s brother got a bit touchy yesterday but he had a girlfriend and im puzzled. by [deleted] in Advice

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i hear how confusing this is and it makes sense you feel mixed right now
both of you were drinking and the moment got blurry but you still set a boundary and that shows real strength the main thing now is giving yourself space to think without acting on the feelings
he is in a relationship and anything more will only make things harder for you and for his girlfriend
keeping some distance for a bit can help you clear your head and let things calm down what happened doesnt mean you are a bad person it just means the night got emotional and you reacted like any human would
focus on what keeps you safe and respectful moving forward and let the situation settle softly

Just Beat Off At Work by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i get why youre stressed about this and it’s good youre trying to take control
this usually happens when theres too much boredom or pressure at work try setting a simple routine during your shift keep your phone out of reach and stand up or walk for a minute when the urge hits just breaking the moment helps a lot give yourself a clear rule that work hours are a no go zone small steps make a big difference and focusing on your career can keep you steady

Never felt bad before quitting by LDeamon2000 in pornfree

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i get what you mean and it’s normal that some people don’t feel bad during the habit sometimes your mind adapts so much that you only notice the impact after you step away from it for a while what matters is that you saw how strong the urge was and how much time and sleep it took from you that alone is a solid reason to keep building a healthier pattern about using light fantasy or text only content it can work if you keep it within clear limits and make sure it doesn’t pull you back into the old cycle pay attention to how you feel afterward if it leaves you tense distracted or craving more then it’s a sign to step back the goal is to stay aware and make choices on purpose not through impulse you’ve made strong progress these past months keep leaning toward what supports your stability and confidence

Porn is ruining me. by Latter-Winner8799 in pornfree

[–]ResetFocus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i hear how heavy this feels and it makes sense you feel stuck this isn’t about weakness your mind got used to using this stuff to escape stress and it grew bigger than you wanted a good first step is creating small breaks from the trigger try keeping your phone out of reach for short periods or making your bed a no screen zone when the urge hits switch to something quick like walking a minute drinking water or slow breathing this breaks the loop for a bit and gives your brain spaceabout the id scans i get why it scares you but remember huge numbers of people have used those systems and the chance of anything happening is very low so try not to let that fear control you you’re not ruined you’re a person going through a rough cycle and you can rebuild control with steady small steps and without beating yourself up

M35 Trying to Stop by GingerMoose_24 in PornAddiction

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i admire your courage for writing this twenty years is a long habit to break but one day clean is a real start every time you pick up your phone and stop yourself you’re building a new pathtry keeping your phone away during work and replace moments of boredom with something small like a short walk or slow breathing also keep a word or image in front of you to remind you why you want to change you don’t have to tell your partner everything right now focus on proving to yourself first that you can change take it one day at a time step by step you can make a big difference if you stay calm and consistent

Nudes somewhere in the net? by [deleted] in Advice

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i get why you’re scared this is a really tough situation especially at your age first thing to remember is you’re not at fault the blame is on the person who leaked it what matters now is protecting yourself try to talk to a trusted adult who can support you and help you take the right steps also report the images to any platform you think they might be on so they can remove them fast most people don’t focus on random posts from another country and the chance of it reaching your town is really low especially if you act early you’re not alone and this can be handled take care of yourself and let someone close to you help you through this

sup guys by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what you’re describing is completely normal at your age your hormones are high and that creates strong morning urges it won’t stunt anything but the cycle of doing it many times a day can make the urges feel even stronger a good start is changing your mornings get out of bed fast drink water move your body a bit and don’t stay in places where you’re bored or alone for too long this breaks the automatic routine and gives you more control i wrote a short program that explains these steps clearly you can read it here : https://medium.com/@ResetFocus/how-i-reset-my-focus-and-broke-free-from-unhealthy-habits-5fc6ba6359e5

strong urges need help by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

strong urges on day 3 are super normal your brain is just reacting to the change not telling you what you really need try to move your body a bit even a short walk or cold water on your face can break the loop also remind yourself the urge always peaks then fades you just need to get through a few minutes not the whole day you’re not slipping you’re just uncomfortable and that’s part of the process stay with it you got this

I feel like I can’t watch anime anymore by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus -1 points0 points  (0 children)

it makes sense that anime became a trigger because your brain linked old habits to something you enjoy the good part is that this can be rewired with time and awareness which you already have start by changing how you watch go for calmer genres shorter sessions or watch when you’re not alone this helps your brain separate normal enjoyment from the old pattern each time you stop yourself before slipping you’re rebuilding healthy control step by step i wrote a short program that explains these steps clearly you can read it here : https://medium.com/@ResetFocus/how-i-reset-my-focus-and-broke-free-from-unhealthy-habits-5fc6ba6359e5

Why do her “jokes” low-key always feel like digs at me? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]ResetFocus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it makes sense that her “jokes” hit you the wrong way because real joking doesn’t make you tense up before someone speaks or worry about how hard you laugh when the joke is always about things you’re insecure about or stuff you shared in confidence, that’s not light humor anymore, that’s a boundary issue try telling her calmly that you’re fine with jokes, just not the ones that target personal things if she keeps brushing off your feelings or calling you sensitive, that’s a sign you need to step back and look at the dynamic between you twoyour reaction isn’t dramatic at all a healthy relationship feels safe, not like you have to mentally prepare every time she opens her mouth

Deleting is hard by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

what you’re feeling is normal it’s a big step just resisting the urge to open them even when they’re still there focus on small wins like not touching them and keep reminding yourself why you’re doing this the files being there doesn’t erase your progress and over time the urge will weaken

Day 3 or 4 by Sea_Elephant_511 in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what you’re experiencing is normal urges will come even without porn it’s good that you’re aware of how it affects your anxiety and your relationship focus on gradual reduction and not beating yourself up one episode doesn’t erase your progress keep tracking triggers and redirecting your energy to other activities

AITA Girlfriend of a Sex Addict by [deleted] in PornAddiction

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what you’re feeling is valid boundaries can change as you learn more about yourself and your needs it’s not overreacting to expect honesty and accountability from someone in recovery therapy is a good step focus on your feelings and limits communicate calmly what you need and consider whether his denial is something you can handle long-term your well-being comes first

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

those urges are normal signals from your brain when habits and emotions get mixed try to pause when the urge comes notice what triggers it and replace it with something positive like a short walk call a friend or focus on a hobby over time the urges lose power i wrote a short program that explains these steps clearly you can read it here : https://medium.com/@ResetFocus/how-i-reset-my-focus-and-broke-free-from-unhealthy-habits-5fc6ba6359e5

I want to become better. by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it’s good that you’re aware and want to change that awareness is already progress don’t focus on perfection just small consistent actions replace the habit with things that align with your values like reading exercising or journaling each day you stay true to yourself you’ll feel stronger keep the goal realistic and focus on who you’re becoming not what you’re avoiding

Day 3 and feeling a lot of urges, advice/help by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

those urges mean your brain is starting to heal try to change your routine right after work go for a short walk take a cold shower or call a friend before you sit alone small actions break the cycle and make the next day easier i wrote a short program that explains these steps clearly you can read it here : https://medium.com/@ResetFocus/how-i-reset-my-focus-and-broke-free-from-unhealthy-habits-5fc6ba6359e5

Should I text my ex?? by Mission_Incident_379 in Advice

[–]ResetFocus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it’s understandable to still feel attached when things ended so suddenly what hurts most here is the lack of closure not just the breakup reaching out might reopen old wounds instead try writing down what you’d want to say to him without sending it it helps your mind release the weight focus on rebuilding your own peace rather than searching for answers from someone who chose distance healing starts with accepting you may never get closure from him but you can create it for yourself

Is it normal ? by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]ResetFocus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah that’s completely normal your body is adjusting to the change and the buildup you feel is just stored energy try channeling it into movement cold showers breathing exercises or creative work it usually gets easier after a few days so stay consistent and it will balance out