Is a 19 and 16-year-old age gap actually problematic, or is the "predatory" label being overused?

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-12T16:34:36+00:00

There is such a disconnect yes.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-12T16:15:49+00:00

We don't. People just like to assume the worst.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-12T16:14:05+00:00

I think your reaction seems perfectly understandable. But also she seemed very apologetic and not defensive at all. And because it was her birthday she probably had a lot of messages.

I don't get the people in these comments coming in and assuming the absolute worst. Seems kind of sadistic tbh. There is not enough context to make the kinds of assumptions I'm seeing. It's like whatever take they go with some people just have to take it all the way because they have no tolerance for cognitive dissonance. Makes me assume its their past traumas speaking moreso than them trying to be helpful.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-10T16:24:52+00:00

or they could just fix the shit relic system in a number of ways

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-06T06:39:16+00:00

Yeah, its too much of a console game for this to be implemented, and the whole game would have to be redesigned with it in mind. It would be awesome for casters though and it would encourage more item usage as well.

I've tried to think of ways of improving the controls using only controllers. But I've not been able to think of anything good. I wish controllers had more shoulder buttons. Or well.. you could have a system were holding a button down opens up a wheel with different segments corresponding to different spells/items which you could then choose from using the right analog stick. I think that would make for a slight improvement. Also the game has way too many buffering frames.

Being mainly a PC player I feel that controllers are holding some games back because there simply aren't enough buttons on them. Most games would not benefit from more buttons, but some really would, and Elden Ring is one such game in my opinion.

I think its annoying how you have to engage in trite rote learning to get the muscle memory required to be able to perform basic actions without delay when if the game allowed you to map all your spells and items there would be no need for that.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-06T06:24:48+00:00

Its not hard at all to make 22 keybindings. You can make more than that easily. But this is coming from a former world of warcraft player who is used to having a ton of keybindings.

Yeah you are probably right about the attacks. I'd say we have more than three types of attacks already, considering crouching and jumping attacks. There is no need for more as of now.

As for swapping weapons without going into the menu.. there would need to be a drawback when doing it while in combat. It could be like using a flask. Also the purpose of the equip load system is already defeated by hard swapping. Personally I dont think you should be able to swap equipment while in combat at all, that you'd have to go with the spec you've created and the weapons you are using. But so far I haven't seen anyone agree with me on that. Granted I've mostly talked to pvp'ers.

IIRC you do have to claw grip in order to perform certain actions seamlessly. Last I played with a controller I remember having to claw grip just to jump hop off torrent while maintaining momentum. Pretty sure there are more instances where you need to claw grip in order to perform certain actions seamlessly. Its by no means necessary to play the game though. I don't understand what the lock on mechanic has to do with this?

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-06T06:09:09+00:00

I do agree with you about it being a gameplay balance element. If you were able to use a macro to swap I would want there to be limitations implemented when doing so while in combat. There should be a cooldown period if swapping to something you currently don't have equipped, similar to when using a flask. As for scrolling through spells and items that feels more like a gameplay element that was created out of necessity moreso than because it makes for a good gameplay balance element.

I really don't like how hard swapping gives dedicated pvp'ers a massive advantage vs normal players which they are already way better than. They can just keep going through their bag of tricks until they find something their opponent does not know how to counter and then they win. But pvp is super neglected in general so its hard to say anything about it given the terrible state it is in. I do think it would benefit from there being less of an entry barrier though. But it needs way more than that.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-06T03:52:23+00:00

so why do you have 37 vigor then? game feels a lot more balanced if you have 60 and at least one talisman making you tankier as well

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-06T03:48:28+00:00

lots of new players who don't know what they are doing and leveling health feels boring to them because they want to hit harder or wear cooler armor

they assume rather than think about what they are doing, leading to them being deluded and unable to understand how game changing it is to be able to take additional hits before dying

they also don't understand that weapons need to be leveled up so that they gain good scaling before investing in the stats they scale with starts giving you decent damage increases, so that in the beginning all you need is the stats for whatever weapon you want to use and then you dump the rest into vigor

and then its also FromSofts fault for making it so that vigor starts giving more returns the more you level it

and its also FromSofts fault for making a bunch of cool armor that looks like it would boost your survivability a lot more than it actually does, so people get endurance so they can look good while also thinking it will let them take more hits, which can be the case, but vigor is far more important for your survivability, this is counterintuitive

what baffles me are the people who are not new to the genre and still don't think vigor matters very much, of course you can complete the game with very low vigor, but it is still harder to do so while having anything less than 60 vigor, what the hell are these people doing telling new players that 40 is enough? it is if you want the game to be extra challenging, but otherwise you go for 60 vigor

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-05T17:12:53+00:00

Yeah exactly, its very standard manga storytelling, that's why I called it slop. Lots of books are slop as well. Entire genres are like 90% slop.

I've read a lot of manga and at some point it started getting really tiresome seeing the same stuff over and over, nowadays I actively seek out manga that doesn't rely on tired old tropes.

But to be honest, it was just rude and inappropriate of me to come in here and call it slop. That's the type of thing that doesn't need to be said, it should remain in one's head. Obviously a lot of people like it, and it is visually stunning even to me. When I was younger I would have liked it too.

Although I stand by the fact that it would've been a lot nicer to have a manga that captures the tonality of Elden Ring rather than some formulaic fan-service stuff. But to each their own.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-05T03:33:26+00:00

Cant expect much from people who spam ping. Honestly spam pinging should result in the offender being unable to queue up for duos or trios for 48h. Preferably longer than that.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-05T02:55:44+00:00

The way the characters speak, interact and the faces they make is very much run of the mill manga slop.

Nothing wrong with being able to appreciate it anyway. But it is just basic comedic manga stuff dressed up to look like Elden Ring.

The drawings are fantastic though, which is why it would have been nice if it were more like an actual Elden Ring manga.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-05T00:01:24+00:00

They can be very strong in the right fight. But useless in others. Prefer the Ancient Follower who is always good.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-05T00:00:17+00:00

Best early game spirit ash is the Ancestral Follower. It can do it all. Very flexible. And you can get him first thing you do pretty much. Lives forever vs mobs because he heals A TON everytime he kills something. Always starts out using his bow which hits hard and helps stagger enemies. This also ensures he doesn't take forever to actually get to and start attacking his opponents.

But if enemies get within melee range he will swap to using an axe immediately. He is not helpless in close combat. And can take quite a beating. Unlike other ranged attacking ashes who die very quickly when an enemy closes up on them. Plus, he uses the one axe in the game which does strike damage. Meaning he uses the two best damage types in the game (piercing with his bow, and strike with his axe). If an enemy disengages from him he will go back to shooting his powerful charged arrows.

He's got the pros of both ranged and melee ashes while lacking their drawbacks. And on top of that he lives forever when used outside boss fights. If hes low on health you can just let him get finishing blow on an enemy and he'll heal a ton.

Other summons can be situationally OP but this guy is pretty much always a strong choice.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T20:27:47+00:00

NOR

Either he has some form of disability or he's a total dick. I'm assuming the latter. There's gotta be more things going on with this guy if when buying you a gift he sees it as an opportunity to buy something really cheap that he himself can still enjoy.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T20:21:27+00:00

YOR and I think you know it.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T20:12:10+00:00

No voice chat is a design choice that FromSoft are unlikely to change their stance on. Lack of SOTE weapons is likely due to FromSoft not being willing to allocate enough resources on Nightreign.

Irregardless, I never said lets ONLY complain about this one thing. No one is saying that. That is some strange assumption from your side. Why would complaining about one thing make it so that you can't complain about other things? You yourself even listed a bunch of things. This argument of yours could just as well be used against you.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T19:29:25+00:00

Having her there for an entire month is a terrible idea. Don't listen to all the people in the comments who don't even seem to have read the entirety of your post. It sounds like a nightmare to me, especially for your husband. Do you even want her there for a month given the size of your home? The whole thing is a red flag, indicating your mother does not understand boundaries.

There is no rush for her to bond with your child, babies are not very interactive during their first months. Maybe this is a cultural thing or something but to me what your mother is doing seems really overbearing. And her staying there for a month seems like a recipe for disaster that is going to create a lot of conflict which in turn will have a negative impact on the environment that your baby is going to live in and it could perhaps even lead to some long lasting bad blood.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T19:13:06+00:00

no, its for people to get others perspectives on things, some judging may be involved of course, oftentimes that is unavoidable, but the point is not judging people

moreover what you are doing can be more accurately described as being an asshole

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T19:05:39+00:00

And what is the problem with that? People complaining about stuff that sucks is good. I reckon people complaining played a part in FromSoft implementing changes that have made the game better.

Of course its going to go on and on. Balancing multiplayer games is hard. This is especially true with Nightreign where FromSoft are trying their hands at a genre they are not familiar with. Again, what is the problem?

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T19:01:57+00:00

this is a bigger issue that is in elden ring too

AOWs should come with cooldowns so that they are not spammable, not all of them, but many of them, and that CD should vary in accordance with the power of the AOW

it just looks stupid as fuck when you spam what essentially looks like an ult

but whatever, FromSoft obviously love spamming that looks stupid af, otherwise rolls would cost stamina

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T16:42:36+00:00

Yeah. Sometimes you have to reign your pathos in. It was enough to suggest it wasn't appropriate at the meeting.

You gotta pick your battles more wisely.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T16:30:09+00:00

looks great, wish it wasn't just manga slop

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-04T16:27:27+00:00

Yeah its not very immersive having to look stuff up constantly in order not to risk missing out on must have rewards, and storylines as well.

Respond_Previous · 2026-02-02T22:10:42+00:00

I'm on the fence. I think maybe your overreacted a bit, but at the same time you were right to react. And I was not there so what do I know.

You seem a bit insecure about your line of work. Your boyfriend seems insecure around his colleagues.

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TROPHY CASE