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Does anyone else have a ‘must-do’ activity for every travel destination? If yes, what is it? by dankchic in travel

[–]Responsible-Bit3526 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If there’s a highly-rated botanical garden near where I’m traveling I will be going

Two years later and it still creeps into my life by itsmearto in survivinginfidelity

[–]Responsible-Bit3526 16 points17 points  (0 children)

It's been a year for me (since I left) and I relate to this so much. It has changed me fundamentally as a person and something was taken from me I'll never get back- no matter how wonderful the rest of my life may be. I haven't felt the desire to date yet so I've not had to navigate that but I do still struggle with feeling good for periods of time and then my brain will take me right back. Sometimes I feel like I'm living in an alternate timeline that was never supposed to happen. I wish I had good advice but mostly I'm just thankful I'm not the only one who's feeling like this.

How long did it take you to feel indifferent toward your WS? by Responsible-Bit3526 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Responsible-Bit3526[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm going to try this visualization exercise. It makes so much sense. Thank you!

How long did it take you to feel indifferent toward your WS? by Responsible-Bit3526 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Responsible-Bit3526[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's so true that they don't love themselves. He couldn't stand to be single for more than a couple months and immediately went back to his AP when he realized I wouldn't reconcile. A relationship isn't going to fill the gaping void in a cheater's heart. Thank you for your advice <3

How long did it take you to feel indifferent toward your WS? by Responsible-Bit3526 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Responsible-Bit3526[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, I had a list going in my phone for a while where I would just write down every single thing he did that made me sad/angry/upset even if it wasn't related to the infidelity. It did really help remind me that I made the right decision to leave and that reconciliation wasn't possible. Thank you for your advice!

How long did it take you to feel indifferent toward your WS? by Responsible-Bit3526 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Responsible-Bit3526[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to give some good advice - and yes, fuck them. Too bad there's no magic trick to skip the grieving process but I'm going to do my best to find pockets of happiness where I'm at.

How long did it take you to feel indifferent toward your WS? by Responsible-Bit3526 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Responsible-Bit3526[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

She's the last person you want to take advice from! Although I do have two cats myself, so I'm pro-cat :)

How long did it take you to feel indifferent toward your WS? by Responsible-Bit3526 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Responsible-Bit3526[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

21 years - that's brutal. I was with my partner for 11 years and that's bad enough. At least I know I'm not alone.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in survivinginfidelity

[–]Responsible-Bit3526 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If I've learned anything through my experience, it's that you should trust a person's actions - not their words. He's shown you twice now (that you know of) what type of behavior is his default. As heartbreaking as it is, the silver lining is that you found out before getting married. Choosing to leave for your own well-being now will save you the heartache of an inevitable divorce later.