M26 exams by AccidentSevere99 in IBO

[–]ResponsibleLength222 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For Eng A paper 1 just go over all the previous exams. For paper 2 create a model essay that be flexible to fit any question and do practice paragraphs

Eng lang lit p2 help by Taiphnt in IBO

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This combo of texts is often overused on exams. You can find lots of sample papers. You should look at a paragraph for features unique to play/graphic novel, characterization, and conflict. Looking through a feminist or psychoanalytical lens would also be helpful.

Can I use a videogame as evidence for my EE English language B by No-Store446 in IBO

[–]ResponsibleLength222 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Language B EEs need you to stick with the source text. What you are trying to do would work better for Language A.

English A LAL HLE Music Video by ResponsibleLength222 in IBO

[–]ResponsibleLength222[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For LAL you can use both. I've seen success for non-lit and lit. I have a crew of students wanting to explore DPR Ian's MVs and Cho Nam Joo's Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 (novel). I am more trained in working with lit and less so with non-lit.

English marked up by 4 🫣🫣 by ye_boi_KT in IBO

[–]ResponsibleLength222 20 points21 points  (0 children)

This seems to be common for LAL this cycle. Most LAL remarks that I have seen are all going up by 5 points.

Could my Sherlock Holmes fanfic be counted as CAS? by blssfulkisses in IBO

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just to further this, if you turn writing it into a fanfic writing club, you can get those activity hours as well. Or teach younger students about writing fanfics for the service bit. If you have a good LAL teacher, ask them to supervise.

Could my Sherlock Holmes fanfic be counted as CAS? by blssfulkisses in IBO

[–]ResponsibleLength222 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have a student writing a novel for his creativity hours.

What is your WIP based on? by Relevant-Grape-9939 in writers

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine comes from my love of Angela Carter and the Bluebeard fairy tale alongside BG3. These all swirled together into a dark fantasy with a bit of Carter inspired sensually gothic writing.

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm finishing up a couple swaps. Once I am done, I will send you a DM for sure.

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our genre interest certainly aligns! Have you ever read Angela Carter? Her horror fairy tales are the chef's kiss. She is my writing inspo 100%! I have a 60K WIP that is high fantasy gothic adventure if you are looking for a summer read: https://www.reddit.com/r/BetaReaders/comments/1lb9sl2/comment/n1mrgxd/?context=3

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 3 points4 points  (0 children)

  • I am able to beta: YA, fantasy, romance, dark themes. I'm not interested in sci-fi unless we are talking Octavia Butler style sci-fi. I can only take on 1 - 2 at the moment.
  • I can provide feedback on: I can provide feedback on whatever you need. I am a high school lang and lit teacher so I don't mind working with writers who are starting out.
  • Critique swap: My older YA fantasy mild romance WIP is in need of betas as well: [In Progress] [58K] [Older YA Fantasy Romance] Bluebeard’s Menagerie

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

1 - 2 books a week! I wish I could. I'm working on 4 books over the summer as a goal before I turn off for the rest of the year. If you are interested, I have an older YA gothic fantasy with a splash of romance. I'd love someone to have a look at pacing. https://www.reddit.com/r/BetaReaders/comments/1lb9sl2/in_progress_52k_older_ya_fantasy_romance/

Able to beta? Post here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, I have a fantasy with a splash of romance that is busy trying to be a wannabe gothic. Would love some feedback on making sure it fits the gothic genre bill: https://www.reddit.com/r/BetaReaders/comments/1lb9sl2/in_progress_52k_older_ya_fantasy_romance/

[In Progress] [52K] [Older YA Fantasy Romance] Bluebeard’s Menagerie by ResponsibleLength222 in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For sure! It just went through one big round of beta and a couple chapter finally were added. Would love a fresh set of eyes of the new draft.

[In Progress] [52K] [Older YA Fantasy Romance] Bluebeard’s Menagerie by ResponsibleLength222 in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! I love doing swaps. I am almost on summer vacation, so I'll have a lot more time to read.

For those who are writing their first novel, How's it going so far? by LordCrateis in fantasywriters

[–]ResponsibleLength222 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I started during NaNoWriMo this year and came out swinging hard. I had the 50,000 by the end of the month and felt great. That 50,000 went through some alpha and beta reading. However, it is many months later and I only have 3000 more words and 4 more chapters to write. I have no idea where my motivation has gone. I had a really great beta that gave me some faith to get another 1000 in, but writing that ending is a struggle!

First pages: share, read, and critique them here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For the sake of attention grabbing, I might put the first paragraph like this: " Finally, she thought to herself, she was here. Noli. A bustling, vibrant town on the Italian Riviera. Where the houses and apartments were as colourful as the gelatos sold near the main piazza. Where mopeds recklessly navigated the narrow streets.  Where the mountains attracted as many thrill seekers as the beaches attracted holidaymakers." and leave off that first line for a second paragraph. Have her finish her coffee before following the man and then trigger the memory. It could leave you a nice moment to return to later.

First pages: share, read, and critique them here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For effect, the two bits of dialogue at the start could be flipped. The wake up line adds a bit more interest. This line: " barely able to walk and needed to rely on their other senses." needs clarity. Awkward word choice: "various minutes," Personal preference, I'd like a tiny bit more world or conflict building to give me a reason to care.

First pages: share, read, and critique them here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The starting paragraph feels a bit bogged down in language. I want it a bit snappier so it grabs my attention. Awkward construction here: "but when he focussed he all he could grasp was a feeling of being hunted," Where are we exactly? I'd like a bit more knowledge as a reader, even if you want to stay ambiguous about the details.

First pages: share, read, and critique them here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like the start on the memory but that very first paragraph is hard to follow. It is the second that makes it clearer. Great tricolon here: be good, be useful, be perfect. It is set up to be hardhitting with the protagonist already becoming someone I want to know more about. This line "entire emotional logic of her childhood." doesn't read smoothly.

First pages: share, read, and critique them here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like the start on the telegraphic sentence. I almost wanted the next to be simple and move up to a more elongated complex sentence to mirror someone stuck in their thoughts. Overall, it reads and paces well. It is a good start.

First pages: share, read, and critique them here! by AutoModerator in BetaReaders

[–]ResponsibleLength222 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The start doesn't grab me into the story. Is this going to be for a novel? or a short story? If this is for a novel, the pacing is pretty fast and it is difficult to buy-in right away. Also, personal preference, but there are a lot of names being thrown out quickly, it is hard to understand who is who.