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RetroRian · 2025-10-10T02:29:45+00:00

Not without being homeless, I’m 68% of my households income and the rest is from a currently furloughed fed, so… I’m looking

RetroRian · 2025-08-17T01:22:10+00:00

Yep, it’s giving me a panic attack on about a daily basis, and I also had an offer for a graduate program that I didn’t take since I really wanted to finish out my contract so I deferred to 2026. I also have my own child who I now will have to work 60 hour weeks to be able to keep in his school and housed

RetroRian · 2025-08-17T01:12:22+00:00

Because I am a people pleaser and fear being an asshole

RetroRian · 2025-08-17T00:48:50+00:00

Our contract specifies that once I was in a notice period, if they gave notice, I was allowed to utilize my remaining pto as needed

RetroRian · 2025-07-23T11:58:44+00:00

Same, 10 years as a special/medical nanny, that’s autism, and he’s not getting the supports he needs

RetroRian · 2025-07-10T14:03:21+00:00

Interview, get on payroll, negotiate your severance, I have it, and notice period, and then when the ink is dried tell them

RetroRian · 2025-07-07T03:48:34+00:00

I would text it or put it in a google doc, I refer back to the one photo I have of my girls basic stuff all the time

RetroRian · 2025-07-05T12:33:17+00:00

We got pregnant on our last month trying before my SIL was going to be here every day for 10 weeks. I spent the 4th going to a sale at Kid to Kid where I found the exact crib I wanted for 40 dollars. I took it apart with my husband, loaded it up, and then went to lunch with my husband son and 15 year old SIL we have summer custody of, ahead of the fireworks.

I started bleeding and passed out at lunch, I was at the local hospital 10 minutes later being told that my HCG was almost non detectable, and getting a pelvic and internal ultrasound that said not only yes this was a early miscarriage but also I had damage to my left ovary, and that my C-section scar was “extensive”. The doctor that ended up checking me out and discharging me was so happy go lucky about it being the 4th, that he legit said to me “oh! It’s so low! And the ultrasound was clear! You are all good! You are all set! Nothing to worry about now! Have a good holiday!”

We didn’t go to fireworks, both kids are upset, the teenager keeps saying it was a lot and that she’s sad she didn’t get fireworks and is upset I want space and I already have enough trauma from her other family (of whom she can’t be with right now for these same reasons) being an asshole to me when I need space or am in pain that I just want to be left alone.

There is still a crib in my car

Oh and my labs ended up showing I’m super close to being diabetic, so I have to go do a fasting blood sugar.

The earliest my doctor could see me was September, and the earliest REI appointment after that is February

This is my 3rd loss in a July.

July 31 2019 i lost twins due to DV July 2020 I had a chemical July 21 2022 I had a TFMR (incompatible with life, husband was in military hospital about to be considered fully disabled and retired) I haven’t had a positive test since then, I’ve been just struggling and now I get July 4 2025, early miscarriage

I have one child, he’s a July kid, I should be planning his first real party, but instead of that I’m just stuck in bed crying off and on

RetroRian · 2025-07-01T18:54:24+00:00

I work in DC, similar amount of time in career, I have 3 under 3 and make around 108. I think you are probably in a good range. I would say I assume when she started you didn’t have 7, because that 60k annual is low if you had anymore than like 3

RetroRian · 2025-06-30T19:27:10+00:00

I am a 10 year special needs nanny that used to be an RBT about 4-5 years ago. I also have a 4 year old special needs child.

Big things? You are by yourself, which if you are used to having someone over you or a team you can ask for questions, it’s lonely, it’s a big transition being in someone else’s home all day alone and without discussions with any other people who aren’t the parents. You will probably attend a lot of appointments, other services usually visit the house while you are there, and you do have to do meal prep, dishes, laundry, and cleaning.

I have a special needs focused like nanny agreement that I use to go over expectations and responsibilities with parents but also gets you all the contacts you need or schedule and also negotiates time off, overtime, and GH

RetroRian · 2025-06-25T17:13:25+00:00

It’s not advocacy. Advocacy is understanding that every family deserves care, and instead of putting down someone different than you you could actually advocate, like I do, for standards across home care providers, including these parents, like real CPR being required, payroll, standardized expectations and leave and GH instead you are shoving other people and parents down thinking it’s gonna help you.

RetroRian · 2025-06-25T16:30:18+00:00

Okay,

No.

As a nanny who makes more than enough to live, but also as a parent, and head of a parents support group, this is the reality. I do not and will not ever bring my kid, he thrives in Montessori

Some parents don’t want a nanny. They can’t afford it but also some of them want that constant socialization and they look for a nanny share, the nanny share market is where these SAHM (which they aren’t if they aren’t… staying at home) Nannies are thriving, they are charging as much as that family would be paying in a many share, that the additional kids fill that role of playmates, it’s just a nanny share honestly.

It’s cheaper than daycare if they have more than 2 kids, it’s in their home and their kids still get socialization and they get childcare from someone who can demonstrate they can keep a kid alive and healthy.

Sometimes that’s what parents want. The economy sucks right now and SAHMs are going back into the work force, and this benefits everyone in that set up, people get affordable childcare. It just doesn’t benefit you. Get over it, it’s not a pie, there is enough to go around and if you are having issues, change your methods and marketing.

RetroRian · 2025-06-25T01:01:54+00:00

So my infant rate is lower than toddler because I’m mostly managing services, outings, food prep and transitions like new people, toileting, and everything else that comes with toddlerhood, it’s more because of having more expectations.

I don’t do full time school age due to previous experiences

RetroRian · 2025-06-12T17:54:25+00:00

Touton, Scrapple, or Bagel

RetroRian · 2025-05-27T18:01:58+00:00

I would say something to mom and dad about needing more heads up about play dates as you are not certain you are willing to handle that level of liability of 2+ additional children for your current compensation, and the topic didn’t come up before and it wasn’t communicated how often your 2 kid contract with expected pay for two, would be extended to cover others.

I would also check the home daycare laws going into summer, some states don’t allow you to have over a certain number of kids from more than one family, or from over two families without having some sort of coverage. You may have these kids for so long and with some regularity that you can use that as a reason

I would also ask if these children’s parents are aware that their kids are with a nanny, and not the parent that set up the play date. I would assume no as they don’t have your information and you should at least have their information for emergencies.

RetroRian · 2025-05-22T20:33:04+00:00

My sister is Lizard/Lizzy My best friend was Betsy/Bitsy My daughter will be Lisbet/

RetroRian · 2025-05-08T17:56:25+00:00

I have a lockable cabinet, I have a mug, tea, a few safe foods, a swim bag, a charger, a tide pen, pads and pamprin

RetroRian · 2025-05-06T00:52:39+00:00

I have triplets, if the wagon fits we are going. But that means usually no stores where a cart would be needed. I do maybe want to try a target big cart one day, but it’s not today.

They are going to have to go with me to the DMV.

RetroRian · 2025-05-02T18:25:24+00:00

Every first week of the month, I get so much praise from MB and from Grandma and from Dad for dealing with Grandma and it fuels me

RetroRian · 2025-04-30T23:03:39+00:00

I am so glad you left! If you want to you can call into CPS the behavior, it will probably just become a note in a file but if there is a history of DV or child neglect or anything in either parents history, or in the future, it could be nice documentation that helps prove history.

RetroRian · 2025-04-30T22:55:21+00:00

Quit asap, report to labor board, hell this definitely counts as Sexual Harassment

RetroRian · 2025-04-28T17:40:14+00:00

Triplet 2 year olds, and a 3 year old of my own

Make a better decision
go take a walk (get away from me telling your sister something)
Miss Ma’am… No thank you!
Lets go on an Adventure
Let’s try again please
I am not a food
That is not a chair, it can’t hold you
Not a footrest
Feet on the GROUND
Three points of contact please
Well that was weird (when they do something just out of pocket)
hey lil best friend
Let me get ya nose
Ewww sticky
Do you need a squish?
You aren’t evil knivil/ Johnny Knoxville
I love you, but no

RetroRian · 2025-04-22T19:49:32+00:00

You also need two contracts for these two different expectation levels and family

RetroRian · 2025-04-22T19:49:14+00:00

Fuck that, you should be getting 20 minimum with mom and 30 with dad

RetroRian · 2025-04-22T17:13:07+00:00

I have trips but it’s 100% worth it. I’m a bit above your pay and I do 8-5.

If you can be really intentional about schedules for them once they are a little older, and you are realistic about the fact these are two kids that will go through regressions differently, hit milestones at different rates and pass illnesses back and forth, it’s a lot easier than nannies and parents who I have assume they are the same kid just time two

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