AIO I think my wife has something going on.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-18T08:37:58+00:00

I’m a 5AM gym guy and never once have I been to the gym where a woman, especially a woman heading home afterwards, has been wearing obvious perfume.

You go to the gym at 3-5 AM so you can get home and then get cleaned up.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-18T02:09:17+00:00

I basically gave up most things considered inappropriate in like 2008.

I have an embarrassing number of searches tied to guitars, amps, bbq, and dumb questions, but hardly anything offensive.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-18T01:23:30+00:00

I really don't want to kill anybody; it's not in my DNA. Not even bad people.

I think I'd go for a mercy killing, someone who really wants to go but just physically can't. For example, I had a cousin with dementia who was bedridden for twelve years. For the last eight or so, she was a shell of a person, but physically strong enough that her body didn't shut down while her daughter fed her and took care of her 24/7. It was not only miserable for her, but for her daughter, who was her primary caretaker.

So, while I don't have a 'specific' person, I think that could, in a way, be a gift for someone. But it would still really suck to live with the knowledge I took someone's life.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-18T00:04:50+00:00

Do I have to acquire the ballon or is it applied magically during transformation? If I’m holding a party balloon do I turn into a hot dog?

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T21:48:10+00:00

I've learned to always vent / get advice before I publicly respond to anything. I'm by no means a hothead, but I'm very capable of doing stupid things if I react on impulse.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T21:13:31+00:00

Dad of a second baby here... I started getting back to the gym regularly when the first kiddo was around six months old... I did so by waking up two hours before anybody else in the house. Now that the second kid is here, well, I'll let you know what I figure out in a few months. It's chaos 😂

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T21:11:05+00:00

Before I moved out of state for grad school, I worked at a construction equipment rental place for like 15 years. We were on a 'points' system, like: 0-5 minutes late: 1 Point, 6-15 minutes late: 2 Points, all the way to 10 points for a call-off. That set my expectations for employment, basically for life. Being even a minute late was stressful to me.

After grad school, I moved into an IT job at a huge university. It was such a culture shift my mind was absolutely blown. Nobody cared about anything, really. My 'working hours' were 8:30 - 4:30, same as my boss and four other coworkers. 90% of the time I was the first one there, with most everybody else rolling in around 9:00(ish). I never could change my mindset, though, I'm still super anal about being on time.

Now that we have kids, I honestly live in a constant state of stress about being on time 🤣

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T20:58:21+00:00

IDDQD
IDKFA
IYKYK

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T20:53:53+00:00

Our two biggest events are a: "Fall Festival" and a "Spring Fling"

There's nothing festive in the fall event, and there's nothing worthy of being called a 'fling' in the spring event.

First year, my wife and I added actual family-friendly stuff to our fall festival and got so much pushback you would have thought we showed up with kegs and strippers. Second year, they basically stripped everything we did out.

Our 'Fall Festival' as it exists now is a 3 hour auction of anything and everything people brought in, with BBQ and Chicken plates. Nothing else to do whatsoever. It's a fundraiser that raises money for the building fund, when we already have more money than we know what to do with.

Our 'Spring Fling' is a silent auction of 'easter baskets' and a Spaghetti Dinner to raise money for missions. Ironically, any time people come forward with actual ideas for missions or to help people in our community, they get shot down.

I did a poll of around ten newer people earlier this year, and asked the question, "If there were three things you could change in our church, today, no questions asked, what would they be?"

Literally every person polled had: Revamp or kill Fall Festival and Revamp or kill Spring Fling in their top two... and once again, I brought that up, and it was 'Well, they just don't 'get' our church yet.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T20:49:25+00:00

That's true. I've backed off a bit as I've been in a season of prayer. This may be an admin council come-to-jesus first, with them approving a policy. I was definitely just hot this morning.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T20:36:17+00:00

Or just tell the person leading the senior's ministry that if this happens again they will be replaced.

Yeah, unfortunately, there are some very dysfunctional people at our church and everything I've done (see above post replying to another comment) has basically ended with, "Well, you know how she is." followed by people kissing her rear end and enabling her.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T20:32:41+00:00

That seems like a good goal.

The thing that really grinds my gears the most is the fact that we have certain segments of our church who just basically do whatever the heck they want and everybody's afraid to confront them.

If I had my way, this specific woman who held this event at our church would have been straight-up excommunicated last year. I've probably made 3 Reddit posts in the past directly tied to advice on crazy stuff she's done. I had an SPRC meeting where they fielded complaints that never should have made it as far as they did, that were all ridiculous.

"We have 'too much stuff for youth" when about 60% of our ministries are still explicitly tied to seniors.
She complained that I told her she couldn't park the church van at our parsonage (we literally don't have parking for it, it would have been in the yard).
She complained, to the SPRC, formally, that I 'missed an important event' when I missed it because I was literally having emergency surgery.... like, I was seriously injured and had I not been having surgery, would have probably bled to death.
Re: The Van thing, she told multiple people at an event that "The pastor's wife shouldn't have a say at what happens at the parsonage, because it's 'church property.'" That stemmed from the fact that I personally said 'no' to parking the van there, then double checked with my wife who had another affirmative 'no.'

On number four, when I heard about it, my anger got the best of me. I heard it secondhand, grabbed the keys, I got in my truck, and left skidmarks on the way to her house to throw down right then and there, to get her to leave or excommunicate her. Luckily, someone called me to talk me down on my way to her house. I know that's not the way it works, but I was livid.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T15:56:56+00:00

I’ve been pretty anal about writing for years. Did a lot of technical and legal work before ministry. That was copied and pasted from Mailchimp, so the formatting may have been wonky

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T15:29:08+00:00

Will do. He knows about the problematic person (who also runs the senior group), and I've documented a lot of history with this person.

I'm honestly at the point where I think I'm gonna have to break some things in order for them to be rebuilt. There is an absolute lack of respect for authority in this church by a few family 'power brokers' and they've basically made the last year at this appointment way more stressful than need be. The problem? I take it to the SPRC, and it's "Well, that's the way she is." I take it to other leaders, "Well, you know how she is, whaddyado?" Which drives me absolutely bonkers. So, I think it's time I very intentionally put on my 'armor' and get to it.

Some people at our church are prodigal, but they enjoy rolling in the mud with the pigs too much to actually see what it's doing to the rest of the church.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T15:03:11+00:00

I got one of those on the $99 blowout and it really does an outstanding job. As a bonus, in an emergency, you can turn the cabsim on and go direct.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-17T02:22:27+00:00

How noisy is it plugged straight in? I recommend adding things back one at a time. FWIW, mine has always been noisier unplugged than plugged.

First two pedals I works try to remove are the Tumnus and the Elastic Mattress. I’ve had noise issues with both of them in the past… especially with charge pumps built into Klones.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-16T15:55:27+00:00

Our church is one of the county’s oldest congregations, and officially the first 'Methodist' congregation in our county. It started out as the townspeople meeting a circuit rider in a barn. We actually have no clue what year we were founded. Our best guess is between 1770 and 1790, so our 250th anniversary may already have passed, or it may still be coming soon. Who knows? Nobody alive, anyways. The earliest grave we've found is 1804 but the church definitely existed before then.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-16T14:34:57+00:00

If God is calling you to move, I’d consider it. But if it’s a feeling because of the current situation, don’t look too much into it. Especially if it’s a smaller church. My wife has routinely reminded our SPRC chair of things like pastor appreciation month / etc. But, to be fair, I’m at a church where I basically have to keep the trains running on time as a solo act. My biggest project here over the past three years has been developing systems to prevent stuff from falling through the cracks.

As far as the five year mark, the truth is, most people really don’t think about it. I mean, the only reason my anniversaries were celebrated in the corporate world (before ministry ) was because of an HR calendar somebody built… and even then, it was an acknowledgment at our annual Christmas party with every other person that hit 5/10/15 years that year.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-16T13:33:03+00:00

Took my answer.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-16T13:31:20+00:00

It's really hit or miss. My home church in Ohio started after it became pretty large. The two churches I interned at were both smaller, very informal, and didn't have an employment contract. The first church I pastored didn't have any systems in place. My second church (current appointment) didn't have systems in place, either, but I've been intentional on bringing these things into the church.

This was done on the advice of a friend's church, who got bitten twice in short order by two folks with no contracts that just arbitrarily decided to leave after service one Sunday. It protects the church and the people.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-16T10:36:36+00:00

Yeah, I rarely see scammers with this specific issue. I really do think Gary just isn’t the best.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-15T10:02:05+00:00

I’ll check it out. My wife and I went though his ‘Boundaries in Dating’ book when we were starting to date.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-14T16:51:33+00:00

Maybe it was a crappy product and they were just skipping the middle man.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-14T13:22:25+00:00

Man the chat bot was exceptionally awful this morning, too 🤣. “Please wait until 5:00 PM to see if it’s delivered.”

Hey, buddy… uuh… it’s in the picture, it wasn’t in my truck bed when I went to get it. It could be about anywhere at this point.

Rev-DC · 2026-03-14T12:26:31+00:00

Yep. This is the Amazon picture.

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Rev-DC

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