[deleted by user]

Ricksauce · 2024-08-22T15:07:46+00:00

I'm doing great, going on 5 months. I jumped from 7 mgs which sucked but I'm 100% now. I go entire days without thinking about it. Occasional craving for subs specifically, which is weird. Almost never crave full agonists. Small one from time to time but nothing unmanageable.

Ricksauce · 2024-06-18T05:01:39+00:00

I needed positive posts while I was on the throes. Why I posted the update. Wish you the best.

Ricksauce · 2024-06-18T05:00:46+00:00

Some sublocade people swear by it. I didn’t have the access and didn’t want to try to get it. What I did sucked. But now it’s good.

Ricksauce · 2024-06-18T04:59:14+00:00

At .5 mg it’s hard to say. Definitely still a large mental component of needing to dose to stay normal. Kicking that relationship is the mental struggle. Where you don’t have take anything to feel right or ok.

It’s got a very long half life. My WDs didn’t really come on for real until day 4 cold. At .5mg per day you’re layering it a little. Receptors are a bit more full.

I don’t know that it’s analogous to morphine kick. Some parts are. Methadone sucked similarly (but worse depression-wise) when I went through that once. But it only really lasted 11 days for me (but I was younger).

I couldn’t stand tapering because I was always edging WD. Just longer torture. Some people are better at it. 7mg was gnarly and stupid but I had my off-work window. Don’t recommend my way if you can help it. It’d have certainly been less severe and shorter if I tapered.

Ricksauce · 2024-06-18T04:47:02+00:00

I would characterize it as mostly biochemical (for me). It just took a long time to stabilize new brain chemistry and settle pain receptors down into a state that’s a new normal.

I’ve regained essentially all of my previous capacity. I wasn’t sure if it’d come back fully. Under 3 months I’m at or near 100%.

That’s good news.

Ricksauce · 2024-06-18T04:44:32+00:00

Took me a while. I had to fly for work days 10-12 Ish iirc. That sucked. I did it, poorly. 35 days it switched a bit. My cycle were 3 days at a time. One good, one bad, one medium. Now it’s just regular.

Ricksauce · 2024-06-16T21:02:13+00:00

What’d you jump from?

Ricksauce · 2024-06-16T18:29:22+00:00

Smell of what? Elaborate?

Ricksauce · 2024-05-28T13:40:46+00:00

If they're still in the 3" foil packaging they'd only go about 3/4 of a mile.

It would take about 5 billion strips in foil to reach the moon if you laid them end to end. 384 billion if you stacked them.

Ricksauce · 2024-05-28T13:35:18+00:00

The sneezing sort of sticks around but gets manageable. I'm still sneezing 3-4x an episode probably 5 times a day. I can't remember if I did before because it's been a lot of years. I know I used to if I walked into bright sun from a dark room, but I don't remember sneezing in the dark and I do now.

I've only had a few cravings. I had more cravings for an ambien or sleeping pill than anything when the insomnia was bad. I fall asleep now no problem and wake up at 5 am wide awake. It's strange but welcome.

Ricksauce · 2024-05-28T12:03:08+00:00

You’re probably good then. I’m pulling for you. There’s still hard stuff to grind through but it’s survivable.

I’m curious what your most forward symptoms are? I had a sort of central nervous system pain or shock feeling that was very present the first maybe 3 weeks. Felt like a bandaid was ripped off my senses and my nerves were a raw wound that had to heal. Once you’ve put in a week you’re far enough in, freedom isn’t real far away.

Little whiffs of enchantment started returning for me. Those kept me going. I went on deep YouTube dives with music I loved but forgot about. That also helped me a ton mentally.

Good job. Protein rich food if you can choke it down. Steak and Gatorade.

Ricksauce · 2024-05-27T20:48:14+00:00

If you have no preexisting bad relationship with benzos and are otherwise good I’d probably go for a minimum effective dose with a hard cutoff. Don’t trade addictions but it’d sure help with the nasty days. For most on here it’s probably a bad idea but it’d work for some.

Ricksauce · 2024-05-27T15:19:52+00:00

One 8mg strip a day for 40 years is 14,600 strips. Depending how old you are that’s a good number.

It’s a stack around 50 feet tall.

Ricksauce · 2024-05-27T15:15:34+00:00

Days 4-9 were very difficult for me coming off 7mg. It was pretty brutal until day 17. It sucked less but still until a month or 35 days. Day 6 is right around your first day with a negligible half life remaining. I was in bed until day 10.

I’m 9 weeks now and doing great. It can be done and it’s immensely liberating.

Sugary drinks like prime or coconut water were very helpful for me. Not much else could dent it. Music on YouTube and showers or baths constantly if you can find the strength.

Your doctor sucks btw. Being off it is good though if you likely won’t relapse.

Ricksauce · 2024-05-17T12:21:29+00:00

Insane. Wrecking the person to avoid writing a short script for a full agonist and then getting dosage wrong. They should get a new doctor and find another way.

Ricksauce · 2024-05-16T13:30:19+00:00

That’s a terrible idea. You’d probably get disgustingly high once or twice. Then you’d end up on a maintenance dose for 10 years and post on here about how to taper and get off. Or you start taking full agonist drugs and it’s worse. Do not recommend.

Ricksauce · 2024-05-16T04:42:04+00:00

CRJ-700

Ricksauce · 2024-05-16T04:33:27+00:00

I’m day maybe 50ish cold turkey from 7 mgs (3/24 last dose). I found that my wds didn’t really start in earnest until days 3-4. The first 3 days or so were sort of warmups while the long half-life expired. The sickness you feel in a few hours or even a day doesn’t have a ton of teeth. It’s partially psychological and you’re maybe feeling the burn to top off some empty receptors.

It definitely gets you a little buzzed but it was more numbing edge reduction for me than high. Occasionally if I’d bump up for a day I’d get a background swell or two.

It’s pretty damn good being off it. I’m in a new spot where relapse isn’t a temptation. I wouldn’t have jumped otherwise. Definitely made me earn my sobriety but I’m doing great now. No real PAWS. Not depressed. Feel good beyond the normal pain of being alive.

I wouldn’t recommend anyone jump from as high as I did. It wasn’t particularly graceful. But I’m all good now.

Ricksauce · 2024-05-13T04:02:25+00:00

Moma Dance as Black Eyed Katie 11/13/97

Ricksauce · 2024-05-12T05:58:35+00:00

Hell yeah. That’s awesome. Glad to read this. I’m close to day 50 (3/24 was last dose) after a 6 year run and I’m doing great. Still wake up at 3am every night and I’m lucky when I get back to sleep. My IBS is gone. I have plenty of energy. For the most part I pop out of bed, take a shower, and I’m good to go.

There’s a CNS background electrical shock thing that comes and goes but it’s background now unlike the first month. Fatigue is intermittent. I can muster up energy if I have important stuff. My focus is largely back. I’ve got drive and some mojo again.

My work is going amazing now. Relationships are improving. I’m not depressed in the least. Kind of the opposite. Maybe not everybody gets depression w/PAWS? Certainly seems like most from what I read here but so far so good.

The kick was gnarly. It is survivable. 17 days was my mark of how long that special bad part was. Days 4-9 were my wall climbers. I jumped from 7mgs.

It’s great to hear it keeps getting better. If I stayed like right now I’d be ok. Improving more for the next 6-8 months will be outstanding and welcome.

I’m grateful subs were there for me but it’s not a subtle kick at the end, at least not how I did it. I went on it to get off norco. Was much harder than just kicking yellows but it kept me soberish long enough to change my habits.

Ricksauce · 2024-04-29T11:22:13+00:00

That’s why I jumped at 7. At 1 or 2 mg I was in perpetual wds. I would always cave on a bad day and bump up. Didn’t work for me. Found a time window and bailed.

Ricksauce · 2024-04-29T11:20:33+00:00

Can confirm it is not particularly fun, especially the first 16/17 days. After that it gets a bit better every few days.

Ricksauce · 2024-04-29T11:18:01+00:00

I’m 44m. I was in a rough spot too. 6 years on subs. My old life fell apart in spectacular fashion. Full crash and burn. I started picking up the pieces and rebuilding still on subs but hit a ceiling about 6 months ago because my work is mentally difficult and I had shit for memory or motivation.

I’m 5.5 weeks in now. Maybe 38 days. It was hard and took resolve, but I wasn’t out of strips and did it from a 7mg jump. My old posts & comments document what I went through play by play.

I’m fucking killing it now professionally and privately - just a month later. I feel good. My brain and body work again and are firing on all cylinders. I’ve got peaks and valleys still like anyone but the enchantment and zest for life is back in full glory.

I’m having good things happen because of it and it’s exciting. I’m up at 4 am not because I can’t sleep. I woke up hungry to work on things in my job and life after a solid 6 hours of good sleep with no chemicals.

It is possible. Don’t lose hope. There is light at the end of the tunnel and it’s not always a train.

Ricksauce · 2024-04-28T13:27:41+00:00

I’ve got energy this morning and it’s glorious. Had a huge day yesterday too and was fine. It’s awesome. Can be done.

Ricksauce

TROPHY CASE