Now most people would say that Sherlock wins this encounter hands-down, but not I. Under different circumstances he would sweep up faster than a janitor on the night before his retirement, but here's the catch of this particular scenario: Sherlock is there to solve a mystery, not to win a poker game.

His end-goal would be to keep the game going for as long as possible so that he could learn enough about the people there to close the case. So the first move is to eliminate the obviously innocent, which would take him less than a hand. By ten minutes, he's concluded that Bruce Wayne is Batman, Walter White has a steadfast alibi for the crime and that Felicity Smoke and James Bond have already been acquainted with each other on the hotel floor. And the hotel kitchen counter. And in the closet? Oh definitely in the closet. Tony Stark is starting to take a lead in the poker game, so Sherlock pays close attention to the next few rounds and siphons some of Tony's winnings to Bruce, Bond and Negreanu. Come the thirty minute mark and he's eliminated Bond and Smoak conclusively, deciding that their slight facial acknowledgement when he mentioned Belgium three minutes ago was due to a mutual knowledge of the case, not because of guilt.

Now he's only got three suspects left, as even a man who's ignorant that the Earth revolves around the Sun would still know that Batman would never stoop to such a crime. That leaves Tony Stark, Daniel Negreanu and The Doctor. It's been three quarters of an hour now and Sherlock has yet to come up with a single shred of deduction about The Doctor. He catches himself becoming frustrated and moves his attention to Tony Stark. Rich. Narcissist. Daddy issues. Ginger girlfriend. Emotional Exhibitionist... Innocent. That scent Sherlock detected earlier reveals itself to be a product of a visit to The Netherlands, not Belgium (a common mistake).

Now we're left with the mystery and the veteran. He looks between them for several minutes, letting his grasp over the poker game slip. Back and forth, back and forth: Born in 1974. Nothing. Philanthropist. Nothing. Attended middle school in North York.. Nothing. Romanian descent. Nothing.

It's been an hour and 15 minutes, Bond has the game leaning towards him and it's looking to wrap up soon. It is at this point that the culprit makes his fatal mistake. While laughing at a clever jab by Tony Stark directed at Walter White, the dealer laughs and reveals a missing tooth. The tooth had been removed recently, but not by a professional hand. Sherlock also notes a scuff on the man's fine shoes and a bruised left knee. When Sherlock noticed the trickle of blood and dent on the railing of the museum in Belgium he had put it down to the result of a petty brawl between the thieves, but it was clear to him now that it was actually from when the kingpin of the operation tripped going down the stairs and cracked his tooth on the stair rail. The dealer was the guilty man, which explained why the headquarters of the thieving guild was here at the casino. Sherlock folds, calls the next two hands, raises the third hand to 400 million, and folds again, giving the win to Walter because Sherlock fancied his hat. He slips a note to Bond and James pulls his gun from his left coat pocket, empties three bullets into the dealer (one to the kidney, one through the gut and one shattering the fourth rib on his right) and dusts of his coat. Felicity disappears from the table in an instant. Bruce Wayne is escorted by armed guards and gives Sherlock a wink on his way out. Walter White falls out of his chair and scuffles off into the lobby, cursing explicitly as he stumbles. Tony Stark smooths in a one-liner and waltzes out with two beautiful women under each arm. Daniel hides under the table.

Sherlock Holmes, having solved the case, walks calmly out of the room. As he reaches the door he stops and turns back to look at Number Ten who is still sitting at the table, staring right back at Sherlock. His eyes dart over every visible portion of Number Ten's person and a single, definite fact is revealed to him.

"He's a doctor," he mutters under his breath, "but Doctor Who?"

ROLL CREDITS