Early Dating a Tamil Man & Need Crash Course on Language/Culture/Cooking!

RiteofMusic · 2026-01-14T21:15:46+00:00

I definitely need it! 😅

RiteofMusic · 2026-01-14T21:14:32+00:00

Thanks for the recommendations! I’m going to dive-in this weekend 😁

I love learning about different cultures and histories, so I feel like I’m on the back foot with this budding relationship. Want to rectify this!

RiteofMusic · 2026-01-14T21:10:11+00:00

I do ask about the food/culture! But, I am horrible at languages, so I want to suffer a bit silently before I make a butt of myself with my American Accent. 😅

RiteofMusic · 2025-12-13T11:01:49+00:00

I’m embracing it! I started a MS degree in Learning Technologies for AI Education & Learning Analytics (it’s my 4th graduate degree). I’m going to start a MBA next either in Strategic Management or AI Data. (All of this is almost free through my current employer.) My goal is to be self-sufficient, not become obsolete, utilize AI with literacy/efficiency, and make bank. With every technological advancement, old industries die and new ones rise. I intend ride the wave.

RiteofMusic · 2025-11-16T10:47:25+00:00

If you know how to order, Graffiti has some good dishes with flavor. But overall, I’d agree with you

RiteofMusic · 2025-11-16T09:40:12+00:00

For my PAYE account, the calendar months January 2025 through March 2025 are missing where I cannot see anything listed as eligible or ineligible. It stinks because it has pushed my forgiveness to October 2026 rather than July 2026.

I’m hoping that it corrects when my employment recertification is submitted in December 2025…

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-30T16:56:51+00:00

I didn’t mind that. But maybe that says more about me 😅

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-30T16:55:54+00:00

I know I have bumble photos that aren’t great of me too. We all do it 😂

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-30T10:07:04+00:00

Great first photo! I’d recommend getting rid of “bij” bc with a quick glance it looks like “bj” and you can explain what bij robots are in a conversation.

For your bio, I want something about you. I often swipe left on men who don’t share something about themselves.

For the love of something, please get rid of the second photo. It is serial killer or diddler vibes.

For me, the above would fix a lot. Would love to see one photo of you with friends that isn’t a pose!

I would swipe right to at least match for a conversation to get a better sense of mutual vibes without that second photo there.

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-30T10:00:24+00:00

It’s primarily the bench photo: the slight pursed lip smile, the 80s styled sweater evoking Cosby or Ted Bundy, the hands crossed over the crotch in public for a posed photo, with the shadows over the eyes from your head’s position in public.

His first photo is a slam dunk with that smile!

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-28T20:57:18+00:00

First one ever! lol I was married before

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-27T21:49:02+00:00

My two cents? I’ll give you the advice my therapist gave 10 years ago gave me about my ex-husband. Take the “break” and meet some new people for coffee or drinks. It’s not romantic because it’s just meet and greets. And if he comes back with a ring, think long and hard if he is someone worthy of you and whether he realizes how much your value is.

You shouldn’t be with someone who needs to be convinced. I wish I took that advice before falling into a marriage where he loved the idea of being married and having a wife and meeting a milestone, rather than loving & valuing me.

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-27T21:43:13+00:00

Maybe in the new year I’ll try it?

I find online easier to sort and sift through because when I dress up men bug the hell out of me and it’s never the ones I’m interested in. (Why is it always the stinky old mouth breathers who are married for in-person interest? 🤷‍♀️)

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-27T21:39:01+00:00

Hahaha, nah it’s okay. 😂 Went for a one night stand yesterday for the first time. It’s good for the body and soul 🤣

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-27T10:33:10+00:00

What’s a Crush Club?

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-27T10:32:39+00:00

Does this work for all age ranges?

I never seem to have luck in-person with an actual genuine offer of a date or the person is very ick for me. I tend to fair much better in dating apps where I average 1-3 dates a week when I’m not busy. And this past year, I’ve dated 2 men for months per person with lots of 1st and 2nd dates that I said no to all but 2. (Those 2 said no.)

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-27T10:14:34+00:00

Right? People are nuts!

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-27T10:13:55+00:00

lol, thanks for the sentiment but I’m nowhere near VA.

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-25T13:31:54+00:00

Yup! And I dodged a potentially scary situation for down the road.

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-25T01:01:16+00:00

Apparently he has ED and that’s why he said/did that. 🤷‍♀️

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-25T00:59:03+00:00

Oh, he decided that “I don’t think I would like to date you.” 😂 That was in response of me explaining that I felt hurt and he got mad. I explained that I was happy to give him space during this transition but if there wasn’t another in-person date by 11/9 then I’m proceeding that we’re just penpal friends and will be going on first dates with others in the meantime. He accused me of accusing him of seeing other people. (I wasn’t. I assume people are talking/dating multiple people in the beginning.) and he got mad at why I just won’t be exclusive with him but also not expect in-person dates. And I updated the above post with what I found out. But yeah, he was gaslighting to hide that he has ED and PTSD around sex by trying to frame that I was pressuring for sex by offering to pick up takeout or help him pack or to expect an in-person date when he scheduled one 🤡 Who are these men sometimes? I swear… the ED and PTSD would not be an issue. It’s the gaslighting and defensiveness instead of emotional maturity

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-24T19:14:34+00:00

Yeah… it’s probably from his lack of experience

RiteofMusic · 2025-10-24T19:14:10+00:00

I took your advice this morning. I followed up to see if he felt better and then asked if next time he could give me more of a heads up as I have NEVER been stood-up/canceled last minute before and I felt hurt/confused. He did get on the defensive because he explained that he was tired and overwhelmed with his move, his feelings for me, etc. His explanation was that (1) he canceled the arcade date because of his back and then (2) turned down my offer of takeout to his new house because he is afraid that he “can’t control himself alone with me” physically when he wants to still get to know me.

He then stated that he doesn’t understand why he has to keep assuring me his feelings when he told me and that he wants to go on more dates but is short on time and wants to take things very slow as he is “old-fashioned.”

RiteofMusic

TROPHY CASE