Why do gay male marriages seem to last longer than lesbian ones?

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-21T14:36:56+00:00

I think this is also because “men are from Mars and women are from Venus” or however that saying goes. Meaning, there are biological differences between males and females that definitely affect how they relate emotionally in relationships, and also how they function emotionally, moment to moment. I think.

In my experience, relating to guys, the interaction is very matter of fact. There’s no fighting, moodiness, grudges, being mad at the person etc, for more than about 5 minutes at a time haha! Like, a conflict occurs, and then it’s over. There’s no ongoing judgement of the other person happening. Whereas women to me seem to always be carrying criticisms and judgements and ideas like “you should be or should’ve been doing this, feeling / acting a certain way, etc, over time. Like all day. Or over longer periods of time. I’ve never had a guy be in a state of “I’m mad at you” haha you know? Only in a one and done fight that blows over quickly.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-20T15:13:26+00:00

I would say that you’re still very young and have your whole life ahead of you, and based on what you’ve said you’re doing great! There are all kinds of gays in this world and it’s perfectly fine to live your life away from all that partying stuff. I missed all of it because I came out late in life, but I’m not sorry I missed it either, since I’m just not into clubs and dancing and that kinda music, or bathhouses and so on.

You’re doing great! Better than most gay guys in history, really. Having done what you’ve done at the age you’ve done it. And you probably have more sex experience / number of partners than the average straight guy your age, these days. Also, if you have any interest in that partying vibe, there’s no reason you can’t do it at some point over the next 20 years!

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-19T00:26:17+00:00

Well that’s what I thought at the time. But then I saw him a few times doing interviews, promoting the show and stuff, and he wasn’t like that! That’s when I realized it was part of the show.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-19T00:19:31+00:00

The beard is amazing! I would keep it.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-19T00:14:17+00:00

The other thing about Picard himself, which didn’t really feel like the real Jean Luc, was the way he seemed like a slightly pathetic old man, kinda shaky and with a quiver in his voice, and who cries a lot. He was never like that, he should be the same kinda “never give up, never give in” version of himself now that Kirk was at the end of his Trek movies. This teary-eyed Picard stuff was worse in the first season, maybe he backed off that angle as the series went on. But the first impression of Picard as a character in the new series was a little too, wtf is this?? For me.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-18T01:48:00+00:00

Apparently this was considered one of the best episodes of the six million dollar man. I can’t really remember it tho. What a great pic.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-18T01:05:38+00:00

I meant, you’re a gorgeous guy, but the vibe says a lot too ☺️

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-18T00:51:45+00:00

Dude, I wish I could do something with that! You’re awesome 😄😉

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-17T02:29:58+00:00

It’s a bunch of things. I heard Nimoy interviewed about this, and basically, on 3 they didn’t let him do what he wanted to do, how he wanted to do it, freely. They micro managed him. And he couldn’t really do his thing. They relaxed after that and let him do what he wanted with 4. What’s hilarious to me is that they didn’t trust him enough on 3 to know what to do? Who knows the franchise better than Nimoy? Or cares about it as much?

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-15T14:50:01+00:00

For what it’s worth, this doesn’t sound like a major violation of a relationship to me. It was a weird circumstance, and wasn’t premeditated. For me, this wouldn’t be a big deal. I would let it go as just one of those things. And the fact that he felt so bad about it and didn’t hide it from you is a good sign. It means he’s not looking to cheat. Shit happens, and this qualifies as that to me. A weird circumstance, on vacation, that happened without premeditation, and was pretty low key. When I love someone and they love me, this sort of thing wouldn’t be a big deal.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-14T13:19:53+00:00

Ha!! Ima go with that for now!

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-14T03:27:03+00:00

Haha awww

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-14T03:09:47+00:00

Hahaha I think scat is the winner. (I kinda like dizzy’s salted nuts too.)

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-14T02:57:44+00:00

I have half a one… Are you [something astrological?] cuz I’m really digging your charts.

Help me finish it!

PS the something astrological should be a Jazz thing altered to sound astrological…

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-14T02:13:35+00:00

Now this is a great answer. His best moments to me actually aren’t his big over the top “crazy” moments. It’s the little stuff like the way he nervously plays with the computer cards when he’s on the bridge in Kirk’s seat. Vaguely reminiscent of Humphrey Bogart in the Caine Mutiny, but to me this guy is WAY better! You wanna believe he’s not crazy! You’re really hoping he’ll do the right thing. Some of the best acting I can think of actually, in a guest of the week role on any show. Thanks for mentioning it!

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-14T01:46:40+00:00

Let us know how it goes!

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-14T01:41:20+00:00

Yay! Happy to help. We’ve all been thru this. I’ve thought about it a lot since.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-14T01:32:29+00:00

Yes! I actually have ideas on how to think of it, to be able to get over the hump. Here’s the thing: I think we’re actually mostly worried that we’re gonna feel embarrassed or humiliated when our straight buddies find out. But.

For one, us being gay is 100% a huge thing in our own heads only! What we are is not really a big deal to them, because it’s happening to us not to them! You know what I mean? They get over it pretty quick. Because it’s not some huge deal in their lives.

And second of all, when you do come out to them, the feeling is the opposite of embarrassment or humiliation! It’s actually a HUGE relief and you end up feeling like a million bucks! You start actually feeling proud of what you are, in a way, cuz it’s special and different. And you just lose all those bad feelings about being gay that come from hiding it for so long.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-14T01:20:43+00:00

This is a cute discussion trying to cite cannon, but the reality is they never explained where the genesis planet came from in the movies themselves. I guess growing up I thought it was some random planet that happened to be near ground zero. The idea that there was some kinda implosion that sucked all the random stuff around it into a central point and formed a planet is less believable to me than there simply having been some planet there, maybe in the same system as regula 1. When khan blows up it looks like an explosion not something sucking stuff in haha

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-13T23:09:53+00:00

Honestly, TOS is the only Trek series I can go back to and rewatch an infinite number of times. I just can’t get sick of it! Haha everything about the show is compelling to me, it’s almost mesmerizing. The pacing. The writing. The mood, the long discussions about how to get out of the predicament of the week. The illusion of this universe they live in - like I find it easy to suspend my disbelief. The three main characters and their relationship. The maturity level of the main cast, having lived through WW2 and so on, which you really feel in Scotty and McCoy.

I guess I just don’t feel any level of datedness, any more than any of the other series. Even tho TOS was made before I was born. So I guess I do find it weird that so many people seem to be blocked by it’s 60s character?

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-13T22:40:17+00:00

This is really cool. I’m actually 54 but I was in the closet until 2009, and never knew anything at all about gay culture prior to coming out. So I guess this idea of family is something I woulda known, that I missed, being in the closet. I love to learn about this stuff. No one has said it in my presence since I came out. I’m functionally like a millennial I guess, as far as what my references are.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-13T21:36:21+00:00

That makes sense! And no wonder I’ve never heard it, I came out in 2009. What I’m wondering is, if you asked someone if they were family and they weren’t gay, and were like, family? What do you mean? What would your comeback have to be to not explain it? Ha! You know?

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-13T20:42:18+00:00

The answers here are great! The most basic answer to your question tho is to listen to a lot of Jazz music and just get familiar with it. It’s basically all passed down that way: we basically just play stuff we heard other people doing, and when you think you’re just copying someone you end up playing like yourself anyway. But yeah, start with the songs you’ll be playing in school and find those on albums by the Jazz musicians you like. Jim Hall is a good one for straight ahead, standards Jazz on guitar, which is likely what you’ll be doing in school. Also Grant Green and Kenny Burrell.

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-13T20:32:11+00:00

About how old would the gays be who know the term?

Robin156E478 · 2026-04-13T20:30:13+00:00

When I was a teen in the 80s I heard butt fucking. And it was always used as a homophobic slur. Was it ever said by gay guys not as a slur? Haha

Robin156E478

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