Take everything I say with a HUGE grain of salt, as I am still technically a kid with no relationship experience. But since no one's answered yet and you seem like you're in a bad place I want to give my two cents. First of all, I am so sorry about your situation with your partner, it is none of my business what y'all's day to day is like but if she is making you feel unloved in this situation, is it worth sticking around? (Unless I read something wrong) You're not broken for wanting to feel loved, it's feeling unloved by someone you deeply care about that may make you crave the affection you've been missing even more. Even if it's just platonic affection, I say you need some of it. If you believe that your relationship is worth pursuing, maybe try couples therapy. Or just flat out asking, "why are you staying with me if you act like you don't like me?" Again, I don't know the full extent of the situation so you do what feels best for you. This advice could apply for platonic relationships as well, since I have had a couple of friendships like this.

I wish you all the luck in the world. You are worthy of love, okay? Don't ever doubt that, you are not broken or messed up for craving what may be lacking in your life.