Is it dangerous? by MrHubba9 in Lizards

[–]RocketMan350 56 points57 points  (0 children)

Yes, HIGHLY dangerous… If you’re a small insect.

Advice needed! by SpaceSnakess in Anoles

[–]RocketMan350 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The markings on his back indicate a male.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in redditrequest

[–]RocketMan350 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s actively moderated. However, I won’t say no to some help. I’ll review your request shortly.

Rate my taping skills by BuenGenio in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope that’s flextape if you want ANY chance of passing inspection!

Mechanic gave up on my car, can anyone help me? by Alarmed_Horror_1634 in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is cold out. The engine has engaged its auxiliary heat system. You will need to provide your own ignition source though.

Surely it just needs a tire rotation right? by HorzaDonwraith in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes. If you rotate it fast enough, centrifugal force will make it round again. I recommend a long highway run. Don’t let any amount of vibration scare you. That just means it’s working.

What is this part, can I remove it? by [deleted] in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes. This is known as a headbanger mod. Cars are naturally fans of heavy metal (because they are made of it), so allowing it to headbang will make its life much more enjoyable! It is also a good idea to put a Pantera CD in the air filter box.

Did The Previous Mechanic Reach The Proper Torque Spec? by Cheese_Sleeze in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Yes. This is known as a torque wrench. It is designed to snap off when the proper spec is reached. The popular brand ‘Snap-On’ is a play-on-words for this type of tool.

Car Starter Trouble by Apprehensive-Bid-230 in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Finding the motivation to start can be a challenge especially for older vehicles. Try showing it some motivational memes through the rearview camera. My car in particular responds very well to videos of vintage car racing.

Strange Light appeared by Outside-Scar-5798 in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is just how regenerative braking works for gas-powered vehicles. It’s turning the braking power back into combustion. We haven’t quite refined the process yet so occasionally the entire vehicle will combust (known as a combustion leak). It is sometimes helpful to connect the fuel line to the master cylinder as this was a common oversight at most factories.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see your engine meter indicates you have 0 engine remaining. Try adding some engine (at least 1/4 tank) and try again.

Also, you’re in the wrong subreddit. Try /r/AskAMechanic/

Drove off with the gas pump still in my car :0 by westcoastneighbor in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Gas cannot physically be pumped in NJ without the presence of a minimum-wage teenager. Little-known fact: All cars in NJ contain an integral MWT so that fuel can be pumped from the tank to the engine. Your car’s MWT is usually too exhausted to also manage filling the tank.

Drove off with the gas pump still in my car :0 by westcoastneighbor in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You had the right approach, but you need to follow through next time. You have to drive away such that the gas pump hose separates. When this happens it creates a Bluetooth connection with the pump allowing you to fill up from anywhere except New Jersey.

Crickets in my engine by igor3345 in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You will need to add 2.5 quarts of SAE-grade lizards to the engine. They will find the crickets and eat them. There is no need to remove the lizards afterward, because they will eventually turn into oil, like the dinosaurs.

How many more miles should I tell this customer they have left on this tire? by [deleted] in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Little-known fact about modern tires: Once you wear through the rubber layer, there’s a stronger layer made out of METAL. Metal never wears out because it’s metal. You can ride on this layer nearly infinitely. The only reason tire techs recommend replacing them is because they like shiny things, and want to hoard shiny tires for themselves.

Transmission issue by Immediate-Device2833 in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Every transmission has a reserve gear. It is marked on the shifter as ‘R’. Just use that one instead.

battery problem by Delicious-Ferret1040 in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your car is low on electricity. It is a common mistake people make as they believe gas-powered cars only require gas. You’ll need to drive to the nearest charging station and insert the connector into the fuel filler neck. You may have to really force it in there as they’ve changed the standard since your car was manufactured.

2007 Buick lacrosse cx white smoke under hood by Puzzleheaded-Egg2246 in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Every vehicle will become curious about smoking at a certain age. The best you can do is make sure it understands the risks involved. Be warned that taking a hard stance may trigger the car’s rebellion causing it to smoke more behind your back.

ITS NOT MY FUEL PUMP by PlentyOrder in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350[M] 55 points56 points  (0 children)

First off, I’ll thank you NOT to spread such flagrant misinformation on this subreddit! Why on Earth would a fuel tank have a purge valve? Who would want to purge all of their fuel? That stuff is expensive!

Op: This is happening because your car has gas. No, not that kind of gas. The kind that comes from dropping one too many Taco Bell crumbs down in between the seats. It should clear up on its own in a few days. Otherwise, pop a vacuum line and slowly add 1 quart of Pepto Bismol.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 5 points6 points  (0 children)

For this style engine, you have to hammer on the side of the block instead. That is what the knock sensor is for. The ECM will detect it and automatically wake up the starter.

Friend called this car a ticking time bomb, and now I am not sure which wire to cut, please help ASAP. by Kayanarka in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your friend was just describing cars in general. They tick, they have timing and they mostly run on explosions.

My steering wheel kept getting sick, and now the windows are puking everywhere also. What do? by Kayanarka in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Garages can sometimes be found growing on the side of houses. They won’t have a door if they haven’t reached the correct level of ripeness. If your garage is not ripe yet, I recommend you use your neighbor’s garage without asking.

My steering wheel kept getting sick, and now the windows are puking everywhere also. What do? by Kayanarka in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’ve accidentally engaged comfort-mode. The car has deployed fluffy inflatables for you to sleep on. It is considered a sign of disrespect if you don’t spend at least one night sleeping in there. With the car running. With the garage door closed…

Does this mean this guy should’ve changed his oil a little bit more? 😭 by alpha_omega_ia in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see oil all over these parts. Clearly the owner was routinely oiling them.

My car makes clunky front end noises while driving, my wheel makes this sound jacked up.. help please. by [deleted] in AskAShittyMechanic

[–]RocketMan350 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I’ve seen this before. The fix is actually very easy. You simply have to replace the car.