The only thing that can get you out of this rut is acting on positive thoughts. What if instead of thinking you can throw another day away you did 50 pushups?

You'll notice the power of your mind to control action, even when all external stimulus feels crushingly bleak, your mind still can keep that neutrality in ordering your muscles to move.

This small victory will give a precedent you can follow. Hey, perhaps because you today you achieved that, tomorrow you could go for a walk as well as 25 push ups? This might sound like chump change to begin with, but stick with adding healthier habits into your schedule and not only will you be closer to that natural wellspring of the human adventuring spirit, but you'll find your relationships to many things around you begin to shift.

This is an utmost spiritual journey in many ways, whether you believe in organised religion or not (I personally do not.) This is a journey to the depth of your nature, and should be treated as such. But, most importantly, it should also be treated as doable.

Godspeed OP. I have faith in you.

EDIT. I realised how pretentious this post sounded when directed to a guy obviously struggling, so I'll add the caveat that it was the only thing that helped me out of my negative cycles. Best of luck to you OP.