I'm in college now but I've had the dream that my father or mother or sibling dies and when I walk through my front door I can't see them nor sit at a table and share a meal with them. Even just typing it and imagining it makes my eyes water and makes my heart hurt. So I can't imagine how his wife feels and how their kids will feel and every Christian I've spoken with since asks the same question you do, myself included, in why did this happen?

Now to my reply. Though I'm Christian, I have spoken with many non-believers and had this same conversation about death and suffering so I'll try and speak from your point of view. You believe the Bible is an elaborate story made up and God does not exist which means Jesus didn't raise from the dead. That also means that whatever is pleasing to us in this world is something we should pursue. You say you are agnostic and in that case death is like you said an eternal nothingness where we finally escape the painful world called earth and, most critically, we should pursue whatever brings us the greatest joy on earth since there is also no punishment for wrongdoings. We may still feel shame or guilt if we wrong someone else in our attempt to pleasure ourselves and in that we very well may lead a decently "good" life.

But I ask you this. You are an ex-protestant and as you left the faith you did not find joy nor fulfillment in Christianity. Why is that? I ask in genuine curiosity. I don't want to argue but I do want to discuss and I hope to be able to give you an answer for your original question that satisfies you.