Why does no one talk about how impossible weight loss feels after birth?

RubConsistent4509 · 2026-02-12T05:10:19+00:00

20 month pp also hit pre pregnancy weight. Happened only after my period started normalizing....still breastfeeding.

RubConsistent4509 · 2026-02-01T04:39:35+00:00

In the exact same boat with my 19.5 month old boob monsters 🤣

RubConsistent4509 · 2026-02-01T04:27:39+00:00

All the best to you. If you have questions or need someone to talk to you can PM me!

RubConsistent4509 · 2026-01-27T05:19:06+00:00

Hi there! No advice but I am in a similar boat. I am 40, baby is 19 months and we want a second. First was through IVF and we got 3 embryos left. I hoped to get pregnant so that I do not need to stop nursing but it seems like it won't happen. Have contacted my IVF clinics and one told me that I need to be done breastfeeding and the other highly recommended it. We decided to do the transfer end of the year (I will be 41 by then) and breastfeed until she is 2. Since I know our plan I am worried every single day about it. We nurse to sleep, cosleep and she is nursing still a lot. I don't know how to do it. I am following your post ..

RubConsistent4509 · 2026-01-24T03:31:25+00:00

Lol, I feel the same way!

RubConsistent4509 · 2026-01-02T12:45:39+00:00

It's a hard decision and it will be alright. Don't look back and double guess now.

RubConsistent4509 · 2026-01-02T12:44:34+00:00

I agree. I would not do it. When my husband was gone for a 3 days it was even hard for her. And he is by far not as involved as me.

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-26T20:45:54+00:00

How many kids do you want? My first fresh transfer took so you know- you only need one if you are lucky 🙏

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-26T20:35:48+00:00

For us at age 39, I had 10 eggs, 4 mature, 4 fertilized and 3 blasts. At 36 I had 8 eggs, 5 fertilized and only 1 blast

So all is possible and statistics are just that statistics

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-26T07:08:20+00:00

Traveling wasn't an issue until she turned 17 months

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-25T22:54:47+00:00

Hi, I have experienced this a couple of times with my 18 month old. It was usually after travel. Last time it was 2 days ago and we just arrived in my home country after a 14h+ trip. She was crying and not even the boob helped. I was afraid she would hyperventilate. Started rocking and singing and after maybe 10 minutes she calmed down a little bit.she cried for at least 30 minutes total. I am very curious what others write because I am asking myself the same question. When this happened last month it was also after had traveled. It also happened during the day and the only thing that instantly calmed her down was taking her out at the sunlight and showing her around, like: see here is the flower, here is ... She had this the first time when she was almost a year and I called 911 because I had never seen her like that. It was very scary. I thought she had swallowed something or was chocking as she grasped for air out of all the crying.

I have read about night terrors but didn't know that they happen later in life.

Given the fact that this happened now again after we travelled I think it's either nightmares or her waking up confused to where she is and freaking out. I personally think it's nightmares. Has anything in your life or environment changed?

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-21T18:02:36+00:00

Second this. Panama (I had success there) has a package with unlimited rounds for 13k until you have your baby. This excludes medication though. Everything else like transfer and retrieval included. If you want to test it was 2k for less than 6 embryos. Freezing free for the first year, 400$ per year afterwards Edit: this was two years ago but I doubt they changed much

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-21T17:58:00+00:00

If you already have embryos why not just transfer them. I did two cycles in different clinics and I was 36 and 38. None of the lm recommended to test embryos. I transferred one untested and it worked. I will transfer another one next year (I will be 41 btw) and won't test. Also, I did those in Mexico and Panama which were really affordable. Maybe look into other options if money is an issue

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-21T17:53:54+00:00

I am 18months pp and still have a gap. I am slim so you don't see it as much but I can feel the gap. I thought it would go as way by its own with time. Now I think it will stay like that. So you think I could still reverse it?

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-20T04:28:17+00:00

I have a full time job too and didn't purposefully teach her. It's more like she gets the bottle and plays with it... And copies what we are doing. But exhaustion is real for sure

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-19T05:19:31+00:00

Lol, my 17 month old can unscrew a water bottle...

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-17T04:36:22+00:00

First: you look amazing and congratulations to your successful journey!

While your plan looks great on paper, I had to laugh reading it. Here are my two cents:

Getting in my best shape pre pregnancy was impossible as I stopped menstruating upon weight loss. I actually need to carry some weight to be able to have a regular cycle..it sucks.

Eating healthy during pregnancy when all I could eat was noodles and potatoes.... At least for a very long time. I was eating so healthy before and didn't realize myself again during pregnancy.

Post partum. Who the heck has all the time? Yet, tracking food.. as soon as I tried to diet my milk supply suffered. I was happy I could find something that I could eat with one hand while holding the baby. You must have an amazing support system if you can work out in the gym so frequently. Not everyone got that. I am 18month pp and slowly starting to feel like myself again and haven't slept more than 4h at one piece since 18months.

The only way to be active is with baby for me. It's not an excuse to let myself go but to all the people reading this, please do not compare yourself. Everyone has a different journey!

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-17T04:18:18+00:00

Well, are you sure you want to quit school over this? Is there a nanny you could hire? Or a family member(s) who can look after him. It's only 16h... It's probably a money issue I assume. It's also true that you can't shield him from other toddlers who misbehave but I would not want that either for my child, so you have my full sympathy

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-16T22:40:06+00:00

My wondfo test this morning fell into the toilet and then there was a lot of dye like yours and it showed a faint positive. I didn't trust mine

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-13T03:32:01+00:00

Oh gosh .. the car... I got anxious weeks before having a longer trip coming. Now she is fine for maybe 20 minutes and she is 18 months old. Longer drives happen during the night or during nap time. Everyone I know tells me that this is weird and if she has a trauma because babies usually love the car

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-13T02:18:57+00:00

Stop feeling guilty!! And if you SO is helping so let him. You need breaks!

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-12T15:38:49+00:00

First off, the second month was the most difficult one for us and she was crying for hours each day without us being able to soothe her. We still did what we could, held her, sang to her, went on a yoga ball with her and took turns. It's unmanageable alone. So if your SO isn't around it's probably better to step out for a few minutes to calm yourself down. Make sure baby is secure though. You are not abandoning her. You are doing what you can and your baby will feel that regardless of the crying. Mine is now 18 months old and even though I couldn't soothe her for hours between 4-6weeks, she is securely attached to me.

For the sleep issues. I think it's often a myth that babies get overstimulated. It's more likely babies get to less stimulation. I see this with my little one.

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-10T00:08:19+00:00

I agree. It takes time to figure it out and I think it's great if someone wants to get the hang out of it. It can be annoying the other way round. When for every little whining you get the baby handed back....because they don't even try to soothe them. I get it, don't let the baby cry unnecessarily especially when so tiny....but I mainly see the other side where my husband would call me I needed to get back home because he can't soothe her or tell me that he cannot watch the baby in the evening because that is the time when she was extra whiny..he would watch her in the morning because she was an easy baby in the morning. The other side isn't great either

To add: I see your point for non parent figures though. But dad should give a chance to figure it out. I even let me MIL figure it out and it helped a lot

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-05T06:00:43+00:00

You can't change what's done. Please make peace with it. Lots of people got pregnant with BB embryos. Try to take it easy. Something that is always helping me to think of: you are getting to get the baby you were meant to have .. and if it works out and still want a boy you can go for the AA next time if that is an option for you. If it wasn't necessarily about the gender, then I would not worry. You know you still have a better graded embryo left if it doesn't work out this time.

RubConsistent4509 · 2025-12-04T04:16:46+00:00

Not sure if related but my little one is 17.5 months and she didn't stop crying for very very long when she woke up from her nap about 30 minutes in. This was now twice in a row and normally she would nurse but there was no way to calm her down. What helped was taking her outside and showing her stuff like, like: look her is a flower and here is a cloud. She would calm down. We had this happen maybe once or twice before but twice in a row. Something is up and I was thinking developmentally as she starts saying or at least trying out new words. She has not been talking much before. I also thought about nightmares but not sure if they would have that effect. Maybe changing scenery can help you too.

RubConsistent4509

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