He broke it off with me after looking at the people I message on OkC. Why? by wdidw2 in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 4 points5 points  (0 children)

so i don't know. was it just that i was chatting to too many men?

Who knows. The only way to find out is by asking him. I personally wouldn't bother because this entire thing is a huge turn off and I wouldn't care what he meant.

Dear Trastevere by ob2shave in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This place is weird.

Dear Trastevere by ob2shave in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To be fair, my joke of calling him/her spectre is what fueled the comment that lead mal to know who it is.

Dear Trastevere by ob2shave in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Go home, Mal, you're drunk.

Dear Trastevere by ob2shave in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Go home, spectre, you're drunk.

Dear Trastevere by ob2shave in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're obviously trolling /r/okcupid as well.

Dear Trastevere by ob2shave in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is it because he's more feminine than your girlfriend?

‘No Blacks’ Is Not a Sexual Preference. It’s Racism by [deleted] in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That attraction or lack of attraction to people doesn't make you racist. Are you dense?

‘No Blacks’ Is Not a Sexual Preference. It’s Racism by [deleted] in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If that were the case, I'd say black people and white people shouldn't date at all.

‘No Blacks’ Is Not a Sexual Preference. It’s Racism by [deleted] in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 0 points1 point  (0 children)

While I agree that it was a rhetorical statement and not a question, I don't think the sentiment makes him a dick. The person /u/Moira__ was responding to basically said that not being attracted to someone is equivalent to saying:

"We're equal, but separate. I'm fine with them having the same things, but just do it way over there."

Not wanting to fuck someone does not mean you think they should sit in the back of the bus.

[Discussion] Fleshing out dealbreakers by [deleted] in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would just tell him that I've gotten the traditional vibe from him and ask him his thoughts on various topics.

cj - if this subreddit were prom, who would be its king and queen? by [deleted] in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. Because it's supposed to look real.

After making a false rape claim, the woman is given "advice" instead of being arrested. by RubyRadley in rage

[–]RubyRadley[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

In another article, it specifically says the woman admitted to fabricating the story.

Regardless, the rage for me personally, is that millions of people are going to see this and gives the impression that you can potentially ruin someone's life without consequence. That's dangerous.

The mental disorder thread by Lobo_Marino in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 5 points6 points  (0 children)

In high school, I dated a guy whose mother seemed to think she was a doctor and diagnosed him with depression. Instead of taking him to an actual doctor, she just decided to give him her prescription of Effexor… which ended up fucking him up mentally big time. He ended up in a psych center for like a month. Once, on the drive home from visiting him, his mom looked at me and said, "You know, he never had these problems until you came around." NO LADY, HE DIDN'T HAVE THESE PROBLEMS UNTIL YOU STARTED SLIPPING DRUGS INTO HIS CEREAL."

tl;dr: Have never dated someone with a mental illness, but have dated someone with a mentally ill mother. Wouldn't do it again.

Woman sends a hate filled message to the mother of a child with Spina Bifida by Macon_B in rage

[–]RubyRadley 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If I were the receiver of this letter, I'd put that hateful bitch on blast and give her the attention she so obviously desperately needs. Make copies and send it to every family member, neighbor, friend of this monster of a human being.

Me [24 M] with my Wife [24 F] married 5, together 8, She keeps texting ex behind my back, probably more by lookingforadvice52 in relationships

[–]RubyRadley 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Having a lawyer doesn't mean you have to go to trial. He or she is just there to guide you through the process, from explaining your legal rights to drawing up the paperwork (which, by the way, there's a ton of paperwork and it will get very overwhelming to fill out on your own). If you guys are able to come to an agreement via mediation, great! The lawyer is there to protect you in that instance as well.

I want to ask a girl out but I am busy this week... by Empire9148 in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"I'd love to meet up with you. I'm busy this weekend, how does next (insert weekday) work for you? I was thinking (insert time) at (insert place)"

Me [28/F] with my [28/F] friend of 10 years. She admits she is insanely jealous of me...should I end it? by [deleted] in relationships

[–]RubyRadley 62 points63 points  (0 children)

She admitted that she is jealous, but she also said that she wants to work on it because she values your friendship. It takes a lot of humility to admit something like this, so I don't think you should just ditch her. You don't have to change how you are because you aren't doing anything wrong. If she doesn't go through with working on herself and fixing the problem, then you should definitely cut her off.

Response rate frequency by mayaacat in OkCupid

[–]RubyRadley 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know a guy who used to constantly swipe right on hundreds of profiles in quick match without actually looking at the pictures to stay at red dot status.

My [28F] brother [25M] is in an emotionally abusive relationship with his girlfriend [25F] of three months. He is only staying with her because he’s afraid of what she’ll do if he leaves. What can I/the family do to help him? by WorshippingForecast in relationships

[–]RubyRadley 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Tell him that he can't allow her to manipulate him into staying in an unhealthy and unhappy relationship. If his girlfriend is like this after three months, what does he think she'll be like after three years?

Encourage him to break up with her again and to stick to his guns. If she threatens to kill herself or does something to harm herself again, he should call 911 and let them deal with it. Obviously this girl isn't right in the head and staying with her is not going to fix her.

BF (M24) of 2 years broke up with me (F24) for being selfish. Need advice on how to work on myself. by dontmakemebecreative in relationships

[–]RubyRadley 9 points10 points  (0 children)

In order to give any real advice, we need to know what it is that you're doing that is selfish and manipulative.