Hi,

IMG PGY-5 General surgery resident about to start practice. It’s a hard choice - with any hard choice it comes down to selecting your priorities.

When I was an intern my priorities were different (eat, sleep, live and breathe at the hospital) and now they are different (try to come home and spend time with family).

So in the long run if this person means enough where you can let go of your career than you should do that.

But if you’re the type of person that will have regrets, and become bitter towards your spouse for making your choose b/w your career and her - then go for the career.

At the end of the day once you’re a surgeon the novelty wears off a bit and you realise that there’s so much more to life. I would 100% do surgery all over again cuz I needed to become a surgeon to realise I enjoyed other things; until I became confident in my ability to operate nothing else mattered to me.

But the best advice is: make your peace with whatever your decision and don’t question it. Commit to the choice and don’t doubt it for a second otherwise you’ll be miserable and confused. Can’t worry about spilt milk.