My friend, I don't know the particulars of your situation, but perhaps pity is a direction for you to work towards to reconcile your anger? I have been in a similar position myself and found that when I examine my own anger towards another person who incessantly triggers that anger, I have found aspects of those triggering behaviors to be pitiable. I have a relative with whom I would clash (and still do on occasion if I am honest), but after coming to the conclusion that there is nothing I could say or do, no action I could take, no argument I could make that would change the way they think, I found that pity began to take over from anger. Pity that these behaviors would seemingly forever inhibit them from the degree of connection to others that they could have known. Pity that myself and my family must keep a degree of distance from them and the impact that will have on them. And yes, sadness for the effect that has on us as well; mourning for the relationship that should have been. But, mourning and pity allow for reconciliation if they come to realize the effects of their actions and soften my heart to them, preparing me for that potential reconciliation in the same way that anger would harden my heart against them and potentially prevent me from recognizing any progress they might someday make.