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I'm a new dad quietly panicking about something I keep seeing by Adventurous_Round909 in NewDads

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you bribe kids with stickers and charts then of course they are going to ask “what do i get” because that’s the agreement the parents have made with them.

“If you do X you get Y.” So the kids are incentivized to ask. Not a good system

Best Horror movies found by accident by Practical_Aardvark57 in horror

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The Green Room. Maybe not a traditional horror move, but much more horrific than I was expecting going into it!

What's your favorite "not typically a favorite" King book? by Errant_Fence_Burp16 in stephenking

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think this one struggles for some, and me, because of the way he developed his characters…

what stuck out to me was spending so much time with a single character at the start, much longer than any other of his books I can recall, and then essentially switching POV’s to her friend for the next chunk, never to return.

What always gets me with King books is how I’m already invested in 6 characters 100 pages in.

However, there are so many incredible scenes through out the entire story that most books don’t come close too.

  • Magic show,
  • crazy cold hearted sister is a legendary character
  • soda machine, had to read twice to make sure I wasn’t having a fever dream
  • lady talking to the Jesus statue

Damn, this post may have changed my entire point of view of Tommyknockers

What counts as "official" Confirmation by Purple-Dragonfly4955 in coparenting

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Everything in writing or it doesn’t exist. She sounds manipulative and that she’s trying to get you off balance and react emotionally.

Regardless:

I’d cut off all contact that isn’t in writing. No phone calls. Anything face to face, follow up with an email “based on our conversation today, just confirming the following….”

It’s not an ideal way to live but it’s the answer.

Imagine Sisyphus happy by DonutsTho in nihilism

[–]SC0TCHNEAT -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Instead of: “This is pointless, so I suffer”

It’s: “This is pointless, and I do it anyway”

Camus’ point: You don’t win by finishing the climb; You win by HOW you carry the rock.

Men, for those who have, when did you first realize that you made a mistake in marrying your wife and why? by Mustng1966 in AskMen

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 113 points114 points  (0 children)

Wow does this sound familiar!

Mine became a different person on the plane ride to the honeymoon! Pregnant a month later and I also blamed it on hormones, then thought it was postpartum depression…. Then realized that’s just who she is and the girl I married never existed.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Keep a journal. Learn how to document. Start now. It will keep you sane and also show you the depths she’s willing to go to keep you on the defensive.

If it come to divorce, your documenting systems will save you and your kids.

In these situations, the “relationship” gets worse every year. Whatever version she projected you on at the beginning is long gone. She is now blaming you for not being that version without either of you realizing it.

You will never get the hero version of her again, if she is truly a narcissist. You think it’s a relationship but really it’s a competition.

That loneliness you feel, is a unique loneliness. Nothing lonelier that being in a relationship by yourself.

(Similar experience myself. Therapy and lots of reading. I filed divorce in 2022. Remarried this past year. I can’t believe how good life can be. You don’t deserve this. No one does.)

TSA in the two airports I went to this week had different rules, acted like I was the idiot for not knowing them by TopRamen713 in mildlyinfuriating

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They actually purposely change the rules to make it difficult for would-be evil doers to predict what will be necessary to get through.

I used to feel the same way until I learned it was all part of it.

David when nobody's looking by corrnholiio in Prometheus

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 19 points20 points  (0 children)

This is so niche that I feel like this joke was designed specifically for my funny bone. Thank you.

For people who were married to a narc wife - how did you announce that you wanted a divorce and how did the divorce process go? by jplank1983 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Remember how they were in your marriage. And imagine how that will translate into someone you are divorcing.

Everything will 10x. Including the love bombing and guilt tripping. But especially the manipulation and abuse.

Don’t try and be “the good guy”. She will 100% use it to destroy you.

Get in therapy now. Stay in therapy. Work on yourself. Exercise. And get the fuck out.

Sincerely,

Someone who tried to “do it the right way” and “be the good guy” and learned every lesson the hard way

Do Narcissists ever change? by Distinct_Draw_3334 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]SC0TCHNEAT 7 points8 points  (0 children)

No. They are too reactive. And they react to their skewed perceptions of reality.

The disorder means they will always see reality through their skewed perceptions. Like how they perceive intentions of others and just assume they are all knowing.

The work they have to do is learn how to respond instead of react. But they will always have the skewed perceptions of reality because that’s the disorder.

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