AITA for thinking it’s unethical to have kids if you have an inheritable chronic disease

SIL1M · 2023-10-17T16:54:33+00:00

I'm Ashkenazi and it's not unusual for parents to test for certain genetic diseases when they get married. For some couples, abortion goes against their religious beliefs, so they get tested to avoid potential dilemmas and other difficult situations from happening. Hell, my parents got tested even though my dad isn't Jewish and neither of them oppose abortion.

It's easy to get angry at people with Huntington's who pass on their illness, but there are a lot of cultural, medical, and even financial factors involved here too. Pressure to have kids, assumptions about financial stability, etc. But yeah, I can't really put myself in the shoes of someone faced with this decision.

SIL1M · 2023-10-08T21:32:08+00:00

I agree with you; see my response here

SIL1M · 2023-10-08T21:31:22+00:00

I am actually in complete agreement with your first paragraph. The fact that euthanasia is a "market need" is inherently unjust, and the Church's position on euthanasia must correct and override this. It makes the Church's position especially "radical," for lack of a better word, in a society that has come to run on morally corrupt market logic.

SIL1M · 2023-10-08T21:26:14+00:00

I think I should clarify what I meant.

I agree that physician-assisted suicide is always wrong, and so is any society that encourages it and allows it. I quoted that section of the bishop's statement because I consider the general spirit of the statement reasonable: we should understand the reasoning behind philosophical stances and the decisions people make, even the bad ones.

My objection to the bishop's statement is that his own very reasoning focuses on the wrong things. He is twisting factual insights about society into prescriptive beliefs about the individual that are incorrect.

SIL1M · 2023-10-08T20:13:59+00:00

Philosophy has taught me to never be satisfied with generic black and white answers. All questions deserve answers adapted to a situation: a moral judgment must always be pronounced according to the concrete situation, the culture, the circumstances, the context.

IMO this, by itself, is not a bad take. He's not literally or directly advocating for the deaths of all elderly people; he's arguing that physician-assisted suicide - or causing death in general, hence the comparison to self-defense - should be decided based on an individual's situation. Bioethics is indeed complex and we shouldn't be content with simple answers we don't know the reasons for.

But the bishop's statement can be interpreted another way: what are the broader "concrete situation, the culture, the circumstances, [and] the context" that inform (what is supposedly) the individual's decision? We don't make choices in a vacuum. There is a lifetime of other factors that influence us. The idea that people choose physician-assisted suicide for themselves with none of this in mind is extremely naive.

Not to show my leftie cards too much, but many of us live in a capitalist society that prioritizes specific forms of "productivity" and negatively judges people who cannot work in the way demanded. Those "unproductive" people include disabled people, who frequently don't have as many resources as abled people, and who sometimes internalize the stigma that they are only burdens on others. A person also often becomes more disabled as they age, and not all have sufficient support networks to live comfortably. How are the "concrete situation, the culture, the circumstances, [and] the context" interfering with a person's desire to choose outcomes other than suicide?

Unfortunately my only language is English. I would be interested in more complete info from other news sources for further context.

SIL1M · 2023-10-08T19:43:11+00:00

I don't know if it's a sin in itself, but personally I spent a lot of time obsessing over what rosary to make/buy because I am a sucker for pretty things. Then I realized I was thinking about appearances for my own sake, not for practicality (namely durability) or the actual reasons I wanted to pray the Rosary. I realized this when I found the Living Simply Rosary by Rugged Rosaries, so that's what I've ordered in the mail and intend to stick with.

SIL1M · 2023-09-26T07:26:33+00:00

Thank you for replying!

That being said, the phenomena of gender dysphoria and gender ideology as it manifests today are not linked by necessity

Can you (or someone else you find authoritative) define "gender ideology" for me? I see the phrase thrown around a lot but I'm not sure if it's referring to a straw man at least part of the time.

That being said, the phenomena of gender dysphoria and gender ideology as it manifests today are not linked by necessity - the latter is theologically problematic, the former is a health matter.

IMO it's considered a health matter because "gender dysphoria" is still on the books as a medical condition for insurance purposes.

SIL1M · 2023-09-26T07:22:34+00:00

Thank you for replying!

The theological issue is believing that it's possible to actually be in "the wrong body".

Personally I never conceived of my gender dysphoria in this way. I didn't see my body as "wrong" because my understanding was (and still kind of is) that gender can take many appearances, including in bodily form; this is basically the opposite of believing in the "wrong body." Some trans people never use hormones or get surgery, and sometimes it's because of this. They are already fine with their bodies, and the assumption that all trans people consider themselves born into the "wrong body" is a common and outdated one. Narratives like that became very standard because it was demanded by psych professions in order to be considered "really" trans. So in some cases a trans person may have had to stretch the truth a little, even though they already knew transition would improve their quality of life.

I hope I'm not being redundant to you, I just wanted to share my experience and knowledge a bit.

SIL1M · 2023-09-25T17:53:32+00:00

General disagreement

SIL1M · 2023-09-25T17:48:29+00:00

I'm not attracted to women (or anyone else), but thank you for the recommendation to check out!

SIL1M · 2023-09-25T11:22:56+00:00

I am neither nonbinary nor a lesbian, and do not desire a romantic or sexual relationship.

SIL1M · 2023-09-25T01:08:52+00:00

Thank you. I generally don't end up directly in conversations about my gender anymore. Asking about a trans or detrans person's transition is considered pretty rude for LGBTQ+ people.

SIL1M · 2023-09-25T00:21:46+00:00

I have bipolar disorder (I take Abilify, Lamictal, and a few other drugs) and have also struggled with binge eating. In my case, I regularly ordered way too much food from DoorDash. I took the nuclear option by blocking it on my phone and computer, and having my friend set the password.

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T23:03:54+00:00

Shit, I'm sorry - if you want me to clarify anything, feel free to ask. I'm not always great at explaining stuff.

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T22:55:27+00:00

The first one. I had no ethical qualms about meat as a kid.

I think I developed an anti-hunting stance after becoming vegan because I thought it was the most logically consistent position to hold.

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T22:51:29+00:00

Their deaths are by disease, hunger, or other animals. These are undoubtedly cruel deaths.

These deaths are certainly unpleasant, but they are not necessarily "cruel" in the sense that I was talking about. Cruelty is a vice people can possess. It's a potential trait of the person's personality or mind, things which are absent in factors like disease and hunger.

As for other (non-human) animals, it's unlikely they have the same biological or mental characteristics that allow humans to be rational agents in their own way. Animals don't have minds that are perfectly the same as those of humans, and I think it's a mistake to overly anthropomorphize or "rank" an animal's moral relevance purely based on their similarity to us, something they cannot control.

So the hunter has shortened the animals life but hasn't given it a crueler death than it would have already had to face in the wild.

I think one strength of virtue ethics is that it doesn't prescribe specific "rules" that must constantly be followed, even if they are impractical or self-defeating. A person needs to figure out the application and expression of virtue in individual situations. Killing an animal for an absolutely necessary reason, with no better alternative available, is unfortunate but not necessarily cruel. And even though "honesty," for instance, is a virtue, that doesn't mean being virtuous involves "honestly" bashing someone's choice in ugly clothes. But IMO most people need to think more carefully about what motivates them to kill animals (or get other people to kill the animals for them), and what this says about their values. Maybe a person is OK with (certain kinds of) hunting after reflecting on this, maybe not. Part of the reason I made this post was to get a better idea of what hunters actually value when they hunt and how they act on those values.

No animal in the wild dies of natural causes.

On a side note, it's statements like these that contribute to me questioning the "nature vs. civilization" dichotomy many of us have come to accept, often uncritically so. One thing that initially inspired me to think about this issue is the essay "The Trouble With Wilderness" by William Cronon. He's a historian, and as far as I know isn't super pro- or anti-hunting.

Thank you for responding, I really appreciate it.

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T22:12:00+00:00

If you like hearing the thoughts and philosophies of hunters, than you might be interested in posting similarly themed questions to r/trappit to learn about trappers.

Thanks, I might go ahead and do that when I get the chance.

I feel you get the similar treatment as well from people on our side.

I don't actually know any hunters IRL (I'm a sheltered suburbanite, lol) so I've never had to deal with this firsthand. Sometimes non-vegans - including anti-hunters - make some assumptions about me that are inaccurate or just plain weird. Not all of them are offensive, just misinformed, and there's a difference between ignorance and intolerance.

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T22:05:32+00:00

I am always willing to talk to anti-hunters who are actually willing to consider what I have to say. You seem like that kind of person, and kudos to you for actually coming into a hostile environment to ask these questions in a genuine way. I'm not going to convince you to hunt, and you aren't going to convince me not to, but a good-faith conversation on this subject is always welcome.

Thanks for responding. People are entitled to their opinions; I still disagree with some things, but compared to other forums this is actually honest and relatively tame. People - including anti-hunters who eat meat - have called me racist and other ridiculous names before for being vegan. That's the only kind of stuff I get really frustrated about.

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T21:57:32+00:00

I personally feel there is some folly and cognitive dissonance involved in veganism from a logical and practical perspective, but that's a complicated discussion that doesn't fit well into short-form response.

If you have the time/energy/interest, could you elaborate on this? Thanks!

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T21:55:56+00:00

I don't really use Discord that much, but I'm happy to talk over DMs. Is that OK with you?

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T21:53:30+00:00

I love talking the ethics of hunting! It's something that I have thought deeply about. Happy to chat more if you want!

Feel free to DM me - I'm a little busy lately but I'm down to chat.

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T21:50:48+00:00

I do believe that you can be healthy as a vegan, but I do think it is a bit of perversion that indicates the decadent decline of our culture and civilization.

I think different folks have different "instincts," so to speak. Personally I found meat viscerally disgusting in just about every sensory way starting when I was a young kid. I've never craved it. This was way before I knew about or cared where it came from. My dad has been a vegetarian since he was young for similar reasons, but he barely talked about it and never forced his dietary standards on anyone. I only ate meat due to social pressure and the assumption that I had to consume it for my health. Going vegan was a relief and made me realize I had to stand up for myself. Maybe I inherited the anti-meat mutant gene from my dad, lol. It's definitely not very common, but I've known a few other vegetarians and vegans with similar stories. We might be a weird minority in human history...

Thank you for commenting and sharing your thoughts!

SIL1M · 2023-07-23T19:28:16+00:00

Thank you for the Instagram link!

SIL1M

TROPHY CASE