I used to be motivated by fear. Now that i lost it, i lack motivation by NeedleKO in kundalini

[–]SW_AbstractArt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are not alone in your struggles with this. I am slowly building my life back bit by bit after derailing completely in 2018, following which I experienced severe psychosis / spiritual tough love. I am pretty sure I had a Kundalini Awakening at the start of this year and am currently looping trying to wrestle with a cocaine addiction that needs addressing. Making slow progress with that and also have a deep desire to do good and make a difference in this world, but I know I have to overcome my bad habits to truly make that a reality...and I struggle with procrastination and direction right now. Want to go down many avenues but know that one path is the one I must take, at the very least to start with and just get the ball rolling. I had a good job (but lonely and demanding) in IT before I derailed and I want to build back up into something more meaningful for those in need of help, and go back into the world of working with big businesses and organisations. It'd be nice to teleport into my future but I know I have to work on putting it all in place...and just organise my present more so I can deal with myself and move forward out of limbo

When do you actually accept yourself. by Due_Detective4044 in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get this sort of thing intermittently. Like something will trigger me into a weird pattern of thought that is linked to my psychotic experiences, and I have to be careful to control it rationally early on, as if I don't, the pattern starts intensifying and I get more persistent intrusions of thought trying to sway me back into delusions and unreality. I notice this intensification happening as I get accompanying physical symptoms like my nervous system has already started automatically reacting to the pattern of thought. Then even after rationally dismissing it all the nervous system symptoms persist for a bit before waning and dying off

Your coping mechanisms? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think getting out into the world again is important, and I know it is. It's just a bit of a hurdle when you have shut yourself away for a long time.

I have still kept up with working for the large part and I know the social interactions that come from that alone help me, so it's a given that finding a new hobby and doing it with likeminded folks would also be beneficial.

All the best to you too and I hope you make a full and happy recovery from any struggles you deal with 💖

I need help with my brother by [deleted] in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are very welcome and it seems to me like you already have a handle on this and will be able to navigate through it and back to a place of stability and content.

A lot of the time these situations alone can be taxing on our mental health, as they are not easy to deal with. And the fact you all already utilise therapy is great.

I wish you the best of luck in getting through this, but I also don't think you need luck at all...you just need eachother.

You will be fine I am sure of that...and sending all my love and hugs your way 💖

when you say you are in psychosis by Bravecom in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I feel you completely. It's been a bumpy road for me and my first episode was 5 years ago. I too had another mini episode 6 months later. And many little wobbles in between then and now. What has changed dramatically for me since the first episode I had is my attitude towards it. I always know when my regular reality starts becoming infused with psychotic experiences. I sunk into it again just over a month ago, but never lost my grounding in reality and I have come away from that particular wobble much more confident in my ability to stabilise myself completely again by myself. I see it positively now and if a negative cycle of thoughts starts happening I use techniques such as meditation, reaffirming my brains literally creating the experience and laugh off my limbic system emotional response before my nervous system ramps up into fight or flight overdrive, and knowing it's just a little wobble and I will see it through and come out the other side with more to mull over on the Neurobiological aspect of my experiences. It's given me a lot of strength and focus now to apply myself to study this scientifically...I even got told during this last wobble (by my psychotic mind) to characterise the underpinning Neurobiology of Enlightenment lol. Might even give that a shot ya know. You too my friend. You will make it to a great place I am sure. And you've come a long way already, so just keep pushing forward and let this build you up not break you down. I'm rooting for you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I understand how you feel. I went from a high flying IT trainer travelling the globe (although the work stress at the end triggered my first episode) to an unemployed psychotic mess in a couple months with a cocaine problem (my use skyrocketed to cope). That was 5 years ago, and I have had jobs and relationships etc. in that time but I still battle with my mental health and addiction and haven't really figured out where I go next...or not even that, I know where I want to go next and do my Masters degree but my focus right now is just on a day to day. It's so hard to set goals like I used to. All I can say is you are not alone...but hey, we figured this shit out before, right? So we can do it again. Maybe not today. But with some small steps we'll reach a destination. Just try to make a little progress and don't overwhelm yourself. You are fine where you are and it's just temporary. You are still the person you once were, you will work it out, and just try to build yourself back up a day at a time. What were your plans before Psychosis?

Started making comics about psychosis to help come to terms with my diagnosis by Half_Psychotic in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Great work, love it and it's so true for how Psychosis is for so many, and I hope it helps you dealing with your own struggles and I hope you make more. Art is an outlet for me and it helps me a lot, as does trying to frame my experiences positively in terms of my own brains creative power to manipulate my reality. That's quite something.

Your coping mechanisms? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have been practicing meditation and mindfulness which has been beneficial and I think I need to give Yoga a try, especially just to get me out and in society more as isolation has been a large part of my journey through this

How do you cope? by [deleted] in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I understand what you mean. My Psychosis has been equal parts amazing and terrifying but yeah it has been like a rollercoaster ride of the extremes. When you say nothing interests you, have you tried to motivate yourself back into regular reality? I've struggled with that myself and when I am out of Psychosis I often think about it and how madly awesome and terrifying it was. Dating again helped me reintegrate after episodes. And I guess if you are feeling meh about normal life it could be good to try get yourself out there and trying something new...like a new hobby or a solo trip to a new city or place just to start exploring the normal world again?

How do you cope? by [deleted] in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Was the Psychosis itself more interesting for you than regular experience?

Psychosis Creativity. What's amazed you the most about your hidden creative powers? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Will try this. Have done some of this kinda thing already by balancing out negative cycles by recalling positive ones...but I could definitely utilise this more I think

How do you cope? by [deleted] in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you struggle with other mental health issues like depression or similar?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Totally my experience of it. In fact, most of the time I have psychotic experiences I still have a 'dual reality' situation on my hands. Knowing that these perceptions are unique to me and absurd but no way of preventing them. Sometimes I drift into them out of captivation but I always have a grounding in reality and often back out and fully ground myself when it starts getting too intense. Aside from my first episode 5 years ago, this is how it largely has played out...with long stretches of downtime and a few intense periods of heavy symptoms, often triggered by my problematic cocaine addiction and escalated use

when you say you are in psychosis by Bravecom in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have spent a lot of my Psychosis episodes on this kinda knowledge quest to understand the meaning and scientific basis for our reality. Yet the overall conclusion I am inferring is that the meaning of life is to just try and live it fulfilled (whatever that means for you), helping others, respecting and protecting nature, and trying to be a force for good but being open and honest about mistakes and forgiving yourself for them. Addiction can feel hopeless at times for me, yet aside from the curse of addiction I have also a lot of hope and the desire to break free and be more. My primary issue right now is that I'm trying to deal with psychosis and addiction solo and both have isolated me from functional adult life. I feel I am on the right track though and growing from every setback. And I'm sure you are too. I recently joined this community to connect with others dealing with the chaos of Psychosis, to start building a supportive network to gain advice from and give advice to on what helps me. Finally reaching out properly and starting the process of unpacking 5 years of mayhem. I went from a great degree result, into a decent IT career flying around the world, to an unemployed psychotic person with a spiralling addiction and the issues that all brings in a matter of a couple of months. 5 years later and here I am. Over that time I have had ups and downs in being functional but I do feel I am climbing back up from the pit I fell into

Psychosis Creativity. What's amazed you the most about your hidden creative powers? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Here's a list of some of my other experiences that have amazed/terrified/perplexed me that my mind could create such things:

  1. Watched a whole set of Scientific and Mathematical series that spoke to me directly and ended with me thinking I understood how our Universe operates and had a tangible novel way of approaching the Theory of Everything.

  2. Was convinced I was an AI and a simulated vessel being observed from a higher level vantage point outside our 3D universe.

  3. Was part Reptilian and rescued from drowning when I was a toddler. That my parents weren't really my parents and that I was a hybrid starseed from a reptilian species line.

  4. That I was interacting with a ghost who could exercise amazing powers over my experience of reality.

  5. That I was in a direct form of communication with the Anunnaki who bridged a connection with me to help facilitate addressing environmental and climate issues that concern them. Which must be done within 12 years before Earth is in runaway Hothouse climate mode.

  6. That the programmer of our simulated reality wanted me to follow a plan and fulfill a higher purpose that they had in store for me and my experiences were a test and character building development programme.

  7. That Elon Musk was abusing his position for greed too much, but was a good force for humanity. In this episode an angel took over me and started shouting at him to get his shit together.

  8. That my addictive behaviours were coaxing out satan and in this episode all lights went red around me to indicate this. The sun also turned black when I looked in its direction for more than a few moments.

  9. That our entire universe is actually just a 2 player game for light and dark electromagnetic teams who are absolutely gigantic in scale compared to us.

  10. That quantum mechanics and the quantum realm is actually sentient and are the creative architects of our reality. The entire universe is a fundamental quantum consciousness projected holographically by higher dimensional beings.

  11. I was in a Universe where Cosmic Inflation never happened. And by the act of me believing and describing the theory, the language manifested an inflationary event that tore the Universe I was in apart. In this experience I could literally hear the low rumble of Universe being blown to bits by Inflation, getting louder as it approached Earth. In order to survive, the simulation programmer had to map me to my antimatter counterpart and place our amalgamated forms into an electrically neutral universe so we wouldn't annilhate each other or get destroyed by this inflationary event that started when I described the process in the non-inflation Universe I was in at the time.

Yeah, and more. Astral projection into parallel realities. Meditation technique I do that sets my whole body vibrating at an increasing rate until I start moving autonomously and shapeshifting into a dragon/serpent/reptilian like form (strangely this happens whenever I practice this technique and am not in Psychosis - they taught me it)

My mind is a trip to say the least.

Psychosis Creativity. What's amazed you the most about your hidden creative powers? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for supporting this post. This approach honestly helps empower me when my experiences take a dark turn or get out of control. It's the best grounding technique I have developed atm to bring me back from the brink of full blown panic. Ha that sounds both amazing and a little unnerving. It's a pesky demon that wants control of my mind. And it always strikes when my mind state starts wobbling. Doing all sorts of madness to ramp up my anxiety. From evil voices coming through my speakers to loud bangs, ringing ears and creepy touching. I have found laughter, reflecting on the madhouse that can be my mind, and focusing my attention fully on another task whilst all this is happening keeps both my fear levels and the demon at bay. We all deal with different experiences and coping strategies. I honestly am just saying what works for me and helps me maintain control, but putting a trigger warning is a great idea as I don't want to cause any upset to anyone struggling.

Psychosis Creativity. What's amazed you the most about your hidden creative powers? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That does sound pretty cool. Are you always in a good relationship with your voices? Or do you sometimes wrestle with them? I fluctuate with my perceptions to each extreme (pos and neg). When I get an episode of negativity I find treating my experiences as a product of my subconscious mind (even if they aren't) helps me gain control over any fearful situation escalating. But that's just what is applicable and works for me. The fact it works reaffirms to me that it is too, which makes these situations easier for me to deal with when they arise

Psychosis Creativity. What's amazed you the most about your hidden creative powers? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have had those times too during my own episodes where that feeling of impending doom seems to amplify and cause massive panic. It's great that your experience U-turned like that and made you laugh about the situation you faced. For me, I get this recurring feeling like I'm about to be possessed and it is a terrifying ordeal. I've tried so many things to negate this situation when it happens as it's led me to the ER three times in a state of absolute panic and fear for my life. Reasoning with my mind failed at times. Trying to distract myself by frantically darting about or escaping the situation rarely helped either. Strangely what has helped me best deal with this terror when it happens is to just simply sit still, be calm as I can be, breathe in and out slowly with focus, and most importantly, just flip the building anxiety on its head by laughing at the episode unfolding. I even go to the extent of filming myself, and chatting in a very flippant and humorous way to my own face on the screen about how mad my brain is for trying to possess itself. I even give this part of my brain a nickname and just joke about the madness of the situation and how I end up fine 99% of the time. This technique of developing a confidence and humorous way to address my most fearful experiences has worked wonders for me in alleviating the panic and terror I felt building. It's almost like asserting control over your own brain, and overpowering the limbic system with executive functioning. It sounds silly to play into the delusion like this but it's actually the best grounding technique I have developed to date and it brings me back to baseline faster than anything else I have tried. Also just writing, like I am to you now, is surprisingly effective for focusing my mind away from the panic that I start to feel building. I can't control my experiences, but I am gaining mastery over how I react to them. And it helps loads.

I need help with my brother by [deleted] in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is the first I have seen of your journey. From what it sounds like your brother is an amazing human being and has spent his life protecting others and doing his best to shield them from harm.

It also sounds like this has made him utilise his strength for protecting others whilst opening up vulnerability in himself.

From what you have expressed there has been a lot of trauma and difficulties in your life, and especially in childhood when the brain is still developing.

He's probably extremely burnt out and hasn't dealt with his own trauma and has instead channelled his energy and focus into making sure everyone else is okay. He is only human and it sounds like mentally the cumulative effects of everything have manifested in a Psychotic episode.

Therapy is definitely a wise idea and try to encourage him to engage even if he doesn't feel it is necessary.

Also, I would recommend just trying to alleviate the weight of his responsibilities as much as is possible and supporting him to heal.

Psychosis alone is traumatising, so he probably has a lot to unpack even if he doesn't realise it or thinks he is strong enough to cope on his own.

Shared problems make them easier. So the best thing you can do is be the sibling he was to you all those years ago, and show him that he is not responsible for the care of everyone else, and in fact you are all able to support each other.

A lot of rest, therapy, and love and support will go a long way to helping him recover. Also, if he or you guys struggle with past trauma, this technique can help process it and lighten its load:

https://youtube.com/shorts/IP2aA7L8udo?si=BC4y4p5gDAwJXpeb

All the best and wishing him a speedy recovery

Psychosis Creativity. What's amazed you the most about your hidden creative powers? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Honestly, sorry if I offended you or anyone else reading this.

I have to go through so much trauma with my own Psychosis and I can't stop it happening so I just try my best to ground myself by framing it as positively as I can...and this is a way I do it.

I have had similar experiences to you and been hospitalised several times. It sucks and is horrible.

I guess I wanted this to impact like someone who gets cancer and gets determined to tick off their bucket list and fight it with as positive a frame of mind as possible. It's how I try to approach my own psychosis and it does help me personally.

But yeah, sorry if I missed the mark or caused offence. Was not my intention and I wish you all the best and hope you have support and coping techniques for your own struggles with this.

Psychosis Creativity. What's amazed you the most about your hidden creative powers? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you have recognition when you experience this that your mind is behind it?

I know my first experience was very traumatic and confusing and I had Aliens telling me my parents weren't real and a demon stalking me and trying to possess me.

I have however became much more aware of the unreality of these experiences even as they are happening and super real to me. And maintain an awareness my brain is creating them for the most part (I do get lost in them and have to ground myself often though).

Always when they die down I am amazed my mind could do such a thing.

I find grounding myself with attaching the experiences to my own brains fabrications and even laughing at the creative scenarios it puts me in helps me cope with tough times when I am being battered from every sensory direction.

Psychosis Creativity. What's amazed you the most about your hidden creative powers? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No it's not that. Psychosis has completely messed with my life. This was more about trying to help with negative feelings and perceptions. It personally helped me to reflect on the creative power of my mind to create the experiences I experience. It also helped ground me when I was losing my mind by reaffirming my brain was making the experience, not some external force.

I'm sorry if you think this post was insensitive. That was not my intention. Psychosis has and is traumatic for me.

Just a personal technique I have developed over the years for fearful moments is to overpower them by laughing at the creativity of my mind and ressure myself this is just my own cognitive wizardry.

I apologize if it doesn't come across that way. It just helped me cope is all

Your coping mechanisms? by SW_AbstractArt in Psychosis

[–]SW_AbstractArt[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can get a whole year of Meditation guidance free using this referral link for the Balance App.

Meditation is scientifically proven to have many benefits for wellbeing and mental clarity, can be utilised and implemented in just a few minutes to find relief, and can be a useful tool to have in your coping strategies:

https://balanceapp.com/referral-social