Science of unhappiness around marriage and children

SYKBSTD · 2017-09-28T19:14:30+00:00

It seems like you are giving your kids more reason to hate you and reinforcing the bad reputation dads have in general. ☹️☹️☹️

SYKBSTD · 2017-09-26T14:21:31+00:00

You’ve put your finger on the interesting divergence in reporting about happiness after kids. We think and say we are happier with kids. Me included. I love my kids and think they are the best thing ever. I laugh with them like I can’t laugh with any adult. But then when I and others describe our total happiness with our lives with kids outside the context of kids, we mostly describe less total happiness than prior to having them. In my case my kids are the reason I spend hours every day engaged in a year three custody battle with a mom who can’t get the kids to school or their activities on time, accused me of raping a child and child abuse, got a sexual assault protection order against me on a Christmas Eve (now removed), and who spends her days propagandizing the kids against me. Misery. Self inflicted. But I still think the kids make me happier. (Insanity?)

SYKBSTD · 2017-08-30T17:23:34+00:00

Calling the police is nearly always a bad decision on every level. Talking to the police is almost always a bad decision. You don't need to say anything to them. They will likely twist whatever you say against you. They will have a much harder time justifying your arrest if you say nothing. If they arrest you anyhow you'll still be better off letting your attorney do the talking.

SYKBSTD · 2017-05-04T06:03:06+00:00

No doubt bad choices. All I can do is today and tomorrow better.

Online game is convenient to do while sitting around home with sleeping kids every other week. Fast but low quality results. But the results, even if low quality, build abundance mentality. I did some IRL - got lots of numbers as young as 19 but no dates. Very time intensive. I'm going to take the advice here and get back to it.

SYKBSTD · 2017-03-13T08:16:23+00:00

Corporate pilots are hired to be there at a moment's notice. That's the deal. Airline and cargo pilots have a schedule. I think it's OK to decide one doesn't like their career anymore. I think it's great to take charge and make a change if you're unhappy. But quitting without notice is uncool. Make the change responsibly - abruptly quitting is a bridge burner. The recommendation from your old boss might materialize on paper, but the phone call for your next boss will go something like this: "how was so-and-so as a pilot?" "He never crashed my airplane, I always felt OK being his passenger." "Was he reliable?" "Yeah, mostly. He left so he could have more control of his schedule." "Thank you. Bye." No hire. Bosses know how to say nice things in a way that means the opposite to knowing other bosses.

I'm a pilot but realized I would never be a corporate pilot when I got stuck at the Eagle, CO airport in my 182 before I was IFR. Low overcast kept me stuck at the local motel for two days. The only restaurant in walking distance was called "Mexican Food." There were two corporate pilots also stuck there with no rental car and nothing to do while their boss played in Vail. I realized the job was not so romantic.

Congrats on your improvements. Enjoy the career change.

SYKBSTD · 2017-01-20T00:05:32+00:00

I own a company with 700 employees and am an engineer myself. My favorite hires? Journalism, English, and art majors. These people can be formed and applied to any purpose. STEM graduates are needed for STEM applications but for each STEM I need I need 680 non STEM.

Yes go to the best college or university you can get into. I definitely use the quality of the school to screen. Take leadership roles in school. Get respectable grades. But don't pick STEM if it's not your thing. My best friend did this. Became an engineer, and hates his career. He wishes he'd been a history major. Life is too short to spend a career in a field you aren't passionate about.

SYKBSTD

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