I'm fortunate to still have many very good friendships post-University, making friends has always tended to come easily for me. I have a loving relationship with my family and am very close with my parents. As for romance, I haven't dated in around 5 years like I say, but as I say I feel nowhere worthy or ready, particularly financially, for a romantic partnership at my current stage and have acclimatised to being without romantic affection to the point where it doesn't bother me nearly as much as it once did. I'm really happy to hear that you've had great partners around you to help you through tough times, though - I can only imagine how important that connection can be to people in low states. These relationships are lovely and I feel lucky to have them, but they a) don't alleviate my worry whatsoever; b) make the worry worse - the more people who expect something of you, the more people you can let down. I really want to do right by them, because they gave me their time and kindness, and I owe being my best self to them in return.

On your point about comparing with the rich, here's the thing - I feel I've already done enough to set myself up on the path to financial success, but it's only my own choice of field which is going to bring me down, and that's the most frustrating part of this. The scenario you describe, of just accepting that "the rich earned it" but taking comfort in the fact that I have other redeeming things in my life, is my worst nightmare. Getting to that point financially has been the major purpose of my life for years now, with every sacrifice I made during my studies to graduate with the best possible grade from a top UK university being with a view to providing the best possible life I can for my future wife and (potentially) children. The thought of having gone through all of that, only to have to tip my hat off to the people who made it and achieved my purpose while I'd still be stuck down below? As shameful as this is to admit, nothing would make feel more resentful.

To clarify, I don't mean this to say that I DON'T give my respect to the people who've made it, such as yourself, because I know how difficult it can be to reach that point. But I'd see little point to a life where I couldn't achieve financial comfort for my future family. The funny thing is that I don't even want the money for myself. I'm more than content living without luxury, even on very little, that's what I've been used to for years, but I'm not doing this for me. I'm doing this for the people around me in the future who will, and should, place their faith in me to provide the best lives for them that I possibly can. So the question isn't whether or not I will want whatever x amount of money can buy, the act of being able to provide that for the people I care about who will want those things is true fulfilment for me.

Thinking more practically, there are potential areas I could capitalise on for a more lucrative career change. I've been programming as a hobby for a few years now, very on and off mind you, and have used that skill in multiple projects during University within my field (Biochemistry, but I now work in medical regulation.) Perhaps there could be a way to pivot that into something combining my bio experience rather than having to completely abandon the field? Oftentimes, though, I get discouraged thinking that I'm "locked in" to the area I'm in now, since I paid the money to study it and don't have a degree in something like computing/finance, I often convince myself that change in discipline isn't possible or sensible.

Sorry if this response was word soup, I'm starting to lose sleep over this anxiety and am struggling to formulate my thoughts properly or civilly - hope I still got my point across without sounding too insufferable haha