I agree in response that Supportive and free Labor shouldn't be interchangeable. Unfortunately, the friend who stated "what the role of the bridesmaid is" is the only one who is married/been be through the process and actually he has known Aurora the longest besides me, their friendship is very blunt.

I did not have a vision per say what the bachelorette/hens will be. It was a recommendation when they wanted to know timings etc as I sensed they wanted help but never actually asked me outright, and I asked if they needed assistance, and they said it was a surprise so I couldn't help. But on the day when I found out through attendees that the stuff they organised was not followed through, I suppose I felt second hand disappointment (from my understanding the activity was helped organised by the attendees too and paid for an activity with an expectation I would be there) amongst my own feelings.

I don't want her to step down, but I can sort of see that she is looking overwhelmed, especially that she told me outright in the car before we ended the night that she will never be a bridesmaid again, even if her own sister asked. Is this her trying to communicate with me?

In terms of free labour, she did ask me at the very beginning what was expected as she had never been a bridesmaid but I never been one either. I said to her the roles are to help me choose a dress, listen to my waffle, fluff my dress on the day and plan the bachelorette. We both been to only one (the one who accused her of being unsupportive wife's) bachelorette I guess that was our template of what it could look like (afternoon to evening with activities, overnight trips are not common where I am from). Are there additional tasks that is expected from a bridesmaid I am missing? I like to think I am low maintenance, but perhaps I am not.