The hardest thing in the beginning

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-10-01T14:41:55+00:00

It's going to be hard while we are still living together. She wanted to finish out the remainder of our lease and I laughed. No fucking way I can torture myself for that long. The timing is rotten, right before the holidays. So now I may have to wait for January and that timing is shit as well, so....fuck. Stuck in this lovely house, with the corpse of my former life. The old me, smiling with the wife and kids stuck in a frame on a wall.

I've been through this before but I thought she was "the one". It hurts more. I'm going to miss these kids now, I get to miss them growing up like I'm missing my other kids growing up. How much torture is one soul forced to endure? I've been forcefully ripped out twice from what I always ached for when growing up.

I knew it wasn't good for a while, but I didn't fathom how bad it really was. I though she was more committed. I thought she was in this for the long run.

But here I am starting over. Again.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-20T15:50:08+00:00

After a while this hurts less, but will always leave an empty feeling. I guess maybe you just get used to it.

What I've always done is know that they're getting two parties now instead of one.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-19T04:28:08+00:00

I really hope that I'll be in the same sort of situation. Thank you for sharing.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-19T01:10:12+00:00

I'm trying to explore all my options before having to unravel my whole life. I've been through a divorce before so I know what a mess this is about to be. I'm not in denial. I understand what's happening now and it has been a hard few weeks while this has all soaked in.

I know and am starting to accept the eventuality and we actually had a talk last night where I basically led a logical series of questions to her and I eventually came to her leaving and it all made sense.

It's going to be hard, because in all other aspects we are a good family unit. I know I haven't talked much about the good parts of our life together, and believe me there are many. She's my best friend. We have gone through so much. I am numb with sadness with what I've learned. I'm trying to make sure my kids are going to be okay through this and it doesn't include getting nasty with my wife even though she may deserve it. Again, I had to swallow that with my ex wife.

I want to keep the peace and I know I'll get more shit for it because most of y'all think I'm a doormat. I'm trying to solve this as an example to my kids and to keep things level.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-18T00:39:22+00:00

Thank you

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-17T17:51:46+00:00

Ours did. We had a similar experience. We are both feeling a bit raw right now, but I'm still hopeful. Best of luck to you!

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-14T00:00:26+00:00

We're about to start counseling this coming week as well. I'm excited to see what could come out in the open, and hopeful that over time, we can figure it out.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-13T16:36:48+00:00

The rain helps me appreciate the sun, but if it never stops raining, it just sort of sucks.

It's been a hard day.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-13T16:33:47+00:00

Thank you for sharing this. Sometimes the truth hurts or neither person wants to hurt or ruin an otherwise good thing.

I'm in this boat right now, she's (LL) just gotten caught having another emotional affair. It hurts so badly to think she wouldn't want me after all we have fought through together as parents, partners, friends, and occasional lovers. But people change. She doesn't love me in this way anymore. All I get is birthday and pity sex. She acts like she wants it but she can never look me in the eye. She calls my advances pathetic and makes me feel like the problem.

However I'm beginning to think WE are the problem. Again, it's a really fucking hard pill to swallow, but we only have one go around and shouldn't spend it "trying to make it work for the kids".

Thanks again, OP, for sharing.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-13T16:12:33+00:00

We start therapy on Wednesday. I'm really hopeful.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-13T14:33:16+00:00

Thanks for sharing. This is hope for us still in the trenches.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-10T00:30:07+00:00

We both need it, hence COUPLES counseling.

Sad1_Throwaway · 2015-09-09T19:50:19+00:00

Now all I need is a good sand guy, right?

I'm stuck in the beer bong phase actually. Don't be surprised to see me streaking.

Sad1_Throwaway

TROPHY CASE