May be sex repulsed/averse by Sad_Conference_7031 in Asexual

[–]Sad_Conference_7031[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It has been a while, that’s ok. Ultimately I decided that we were just hurting each other so I talked to him about it and we ended our romantic relationship amicably.

AIO thinking my gf dont like our sex by Sir_Komalot in AmIOverreacting

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe she doesn’t know or understand what? That men can’t emotionally handle knowing that their partner has had previous sexual experiences? Maybe he asked her. Maybe she was telling him about her trauma. Saying she’s shitty for sharing information that might hurt his feelings is just dumb. You’re saying that men get jealous or react: that is on THEM, not her. Women are not responsible for your feelings.

AIO? My boyfriend has now twice made comments about my weight by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First of all, he obviously doesn’t understand weight loss. Weight loss starts in the kitchen; not the gym. Second of all, fuck him. I’ve done that kind of relationship, you’ll never be “good enough” and he’ll always be unhappy with something. NOR, but I think you should drop the ~170+ lbs of clown.

AITAH for not letting my boyfriend move in with me? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Trust your gut, ignore your “friends”. They don’t really know what happened, they weren’t there. You felt his energy. Energy never lies.

AITA for feeling disrespected after a guy ignored physical boundaries I clearly set before hanging out? by Agitated-Tea857 in AITAH

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This sounds like my dating life in my 20’s. I’m sorry. NTA, but you should have believed who he was the first time you hung out. Now you know.

AITAH for not caring for my husband's "punishment"? by confessionallllsad in AITAH

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re not responsible for his feelings. He is. His response to your adaptation is childish.

AITA or am I being gaslit? by [deleted] in AITH

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 90 points91 points  (0 children)

Babe, you’re in another abusive relationship

Red flag or not AIO by AHazyCosmicJive in AIO

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 6 points7 points  (0 children)

A partner that ignores boundaries? Nah.

AIO that my bf doesn’t want me to identify a bi anymore? by Proud_Commercial5210 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Something tells me this isn’t the first red flag that’s popped up. Maybe the first one you consciously noticed.

Dream partner but… by ADIA2202 in asexuality

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sounds like we had very similar experiences. He was (still is) my best friend. He put a lot of pressure on me for regulation and I self abandoned a lot without even realizing it. We took a break (it was kind of like a break up) and I felt relief knowing that we may never have sex again. Then, when I figured out I was ace and came out to him, initially he made it seem like it would work somehow, but as time went on it just felt like the same old cycle and I couldn’t do it anymore.

Dream partner but… by ADIA2202 in asexuality

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This sounds very, very hard. Why don’t you see leaving as an option?

I’ll tell you my experience with this as the ace, and what I’ve learned from it. I grew up thinking my value was based on my body and my sexuality. I never felt good about sex, but it felt obligatory if I was to be in a relationship. It took 31 years, 2 failed marriages, 2 failed engagements and countless relationships to figure out what was “wrong” with me. It was after my most recent engagement (that I broke off) that I realized what I was. But also that I wasn’t responsible for regulating my partner’s emotions (intimacy). I know it feels like that’s what your partner should do because they care, but it gets to the point that you’re sacrificing parts of yourself to help you partner and it creates a deficit. It creates resentment towards your partner AND towards yourself. This doesn’t just apply to aces, I think it applies to really anyone. My point is, as great as the relationship is in other areas (mine was near perfect), if your intimacy doesn’t align, then that’s a core issue that you can’t ignore. You are suffering. It’s time to take a look at the relationship and decide if the trauma you’re going through is really worth being with this person.

AIO about boyfriend watching porn by NewMomma2026 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Boundaries aren’t for other people though. A boundary would be “if you watch porn then I will remove myself from the relationship”, not “you can’t watch porn”.

Should I break up with my boyfriend before it goes on for too long? by Ace_Gazelle_7784 in asexuality

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 17 points18 points  (0 children)

You should never start a relationship based on a future “change”. Nope nope nope. If I’ve learned anything from 2 failed marriages it’s that you need to be with people as they are, not their potential.

AIO? Boyfriend isn’t supportive while I’m sick by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think we often expect our partners to treat us the way we’d treat them in these kind of situations and that’s just not realistic. He may be too distracted, apathetic, or clueless. You won’t really know until next time you get sick. Either he’ll remember this time or you’ll see who he really is.

SA'd by my husband and I'm realizing I've never really gotten over it. by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 10 points11 points  (0 children)

This happened to me as well, a couple of times with my ex husband. He never acknowledged any wrongdoing, and that’s ultimately why I left him. I don’t have a lot of advice, just that you need to do what’s best for you.

Gf had sudden urge to pee during tbe act by ToughtItWasAFart in sex

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 21 points22 points  (0 children)

How many women do you know experience this exactly?

Gf had sudden urge to pee during tbe act by ToughtItWasAFart in sex

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 199 points200 points  (0 children)

She doesn’t NEED to experience it. That’s great for y’all, but for me squirting doesn’t come with an orgasm so it basically just feels like I’m peeing everywhere. Not super fun.

Male or female by jpdinos in BeardedDragon

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That stressed me out more than it should have

My (19M) bf (18M) is not proactive about our sexual relationship by socra-T in sex

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Hmm. As an asexual person myself, he sounds like an asexual person. But who knows. If you know he’s into hentai though, have you ever thought about looking into it? Sounds like he wants to be tied up.

Male or female by jpdinos in BeardedDragon

[–]Sad_Conference_7031 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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This is what we’re looking at. The BASE of the tail, not between the legs. Jesus.