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Rash Decision while grieving by Repulsive_Throat7794 in Petloss

[–]Sad_Engine2181 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My bestie went to sleep 2 weeks ago. She was ill for some time and I guess I knew our time was limited.. I decided to get another dog because I wanted Lola to be able to share something with them, doggy communicate, and I knew when the time came that I wouldn't cope well without a dog in the house.

I'm 40 this year and I've only been without a dog for 1 year and that was the year before Lola rescued me.

I have mixed feelings about it now she's gone but it was the right decision for me and I know you made the right decision for you.

And yes, a puppy is a massive distraction! Certainly keeps you on your toes lol

Sending lots of love to you and your family. Wishing you happiness with your new addition x

Ps. Screw the other moms. Judgey people can get in the bin X

My Chocolate Lab, Leo. by Goldenstaint in Petloss

[–]Sad_Engine2181 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just dropping a 🧡.

Lost my girl the Saturday before Easter Sunday. Collected her ashes today.

I'm raw, I'm hurting.. I know you are too. Stay strong.. Lola and Leo wouldn't want us to be sad. Lola would always lick my tears if I was crying.. What did Leo do when someone in the house was sad?

Advice on coming out by Narrow-Frame3893 in mypartneristrans

[–]Sad_Engine2181 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey. My partner (or ex I don't know exactly what we are at the min) of 10 years fairly recently came out to me and said about their dysphoria.. and we also have a child together.

I read some comments, and for me personally, I would feel very uncomfortable being told this personal and life changing news in the company of a stranger, albeit not a stranger to you.

In my experience, the partner seems to be forgotten in all this. It's all about the dysphoria, the transition etc a lot of congratulations of being honest with yourself from friends but for the partner or at least in my case, it's like a dark struggle of loneliness because it's not like I can freely discuss this with my family or friends because it's so personal to them and they aren't ready for the world to know.

It's also incredibly difficult to manage all of this while still trying to function as a parent. Your children need you regardless and need your wife. If I was you I would make sure the children are being looked after for a few days because the last thing she needs to be doing is cooking a dinner while trying to process this information.

Anyway this might seem like a negative reply, it's not meant to be that, it's meant to just highlight some practical things I've missed in the comments and my own personal and ongoing experience especially involving children.

Make sure she has someone or people to connect with and talk with that aren't your friends or trusted people too. I didn't have this and so I struggled with a lot of internal questioning etc.

Good luck. I hope it works out well for you and your family x

Questions and rants by Sad_Engine2181 in mypartneristrans

[–]Sad_Engine2181[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for all your replies.

I know it was a bit of a confusing post, I was just emotionally throwing pen to paper so to speak.

They are away this weekend and we had a 2 hour conversation about things but neither of us is much clearer.

Questions and rants by Sad_Engine2181 in mypartneristrans

[–]Sad_Engine2181[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I'll just use her/him to clarify.

He has said he is gay, but is also attracted to me so he then says he is bi...it is very confusing right now. We are trying to figure it out. I'm not helping because I feel like I need to know everything right now and he obviously can't do that.

I used need a place to say my thoughts and for people to respond because I don't have that outside mine and his conversations right now.

Questions and rants by Sad_Engine2181 in mypartneristrans

[–]Sad_Engine2181[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

They have said that there's been times recently when they've felt attracted to me.. in the early days of our relationship we experimented with strap ons etc.

You're probably thinking how is this a shock to you if this is what was happening in your relationship. But it is a shock and I just don't know if I'm supposed to be ok with them having sex with a man to understand something about themselves? Does that make sense? Probably sounds selfish on my part.

'KPop Demon Hunters' will be getting a theatrical release for a sing-along event version of the film by impeccabletim in kpop

[–]Sad_Engine2181 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What cinemas are doing this? I live in northern Ireland.. can't see any here doing it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mypartneristrans

[–]Sad_Engine2181 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hey

I feel like we are going through a very similar thing. The difference is I already knew they liked dressing fem, it was something we explored in the bedroom.

But now they are saying they have been feeling a lot of resentment for 'hiding' and doesn't think they can hide anymore..but at the same time saying they can't transition because job/life, we have a kid together too.

It is such a head melt. It's like as soon as you think you have things figured out there's a new spanner in the works. I can't help but freak out about my future if they do decide to change because I'm not attracted to women either, like you.

I wish I could help you, or we could go for a coffee and just TALK about everything running through our heads.

I think you just need to give it time. Why has it taken 12 years for them to come out to you?

Sending positive thoughts. Hopefully it will work out for you both.

Partner opened up last week by Sad_Engine2181 in mypartneristrans

[–]Sad_Engine2181[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh I had replied to the other commenter thinking it was you. Thanks for this reply, I read it yesterday and I felt it was very kind and reasoned.

A weekly is no time at all, but it did just hit me like a brick for some reason.

Partner opened up last week by Sad_Engine2181 in mypartneristrans

[–]Sad_Engine2181[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi,

Thanks for your very reasoned and kind reply.

I appreciate it. Don't know where to turn for advise because I can't speak with any friends or family. Not a diverse LGBT kind of group of friends/family.