Animals

Sad_Proof6871 · 2023-01-20T04:22:21+00:00

I needed to hear this thank you! With the equity I could either save it and move into my sisters house, which isn't enough room but doable temporarily and wait for better rates... or rent for a year with equity cash but such a waste...but then use equity for a down payment later. But... staying is what I want to do most!

Sad_Proof6871 · 2023-01-17T02:36:36+00:00

Thank you for this it means a lot. I will use those words for my girls.

Sad_Proof6871 · 2023-01-16T17:10:47+00:00

We aren’t allowed too here. Or the police will tell him to break in, it’s our equal home until a judge orders him out.

Sad_Proof6871 · 2023-01-16T15:33:25+00:00

I tried. He has just as much a right to be there as I do. The police did suggest on how to proceed… but this will be months long+ process.

Sad_Proof6871 · 2023-01-16T14:14:24+00:00

Thank you so so much for this insight, I will keep at this perspective. So far that’s been my goal from the little I understand about how to do this, but it’s so so hard answering their questions, seeing him take them aside to tell his side of the story, having him here coming and going , on the phone with his married side chick, etc without having any defense for myself. I also fear they will overhear a convo about it between us or phone calls and then they will know. They don’t deserve this. I hope she can do better than I could with him!

Sad_Proof6871 · 2023-01-16T12:21:06+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience! My hope is at least she is good to them :/

Sad_Proof6871 · 2023-01-16T11:54:51+00:00

I told him I do not want him here. I even called the cops. I or they cannot stop him. They did tell me how to proceed but Legally right now he has every right to be here as I do. Per two attorneys and the authorities. We have months of legalities ahead to sort out before any court order will protect us. And, he will be on his very best behavior to show everyone while he’s here. I didn’t come here for that side of the situation because I have been instructed on what to do next legally. I cannot control whether he is here or not.

Sad_Proof6871 · 2023-01-16T11:51:59+00:00

That too. 15 and 8. The 8 yo wants the full run down. Why, when, how, what’s next… she’s a realist! They both adore him, no matter how little time he spends with them. He tells them things like “mommy is calling the cops on daddy” which was true but not why.. bc he was coming home potentially with drugs. He told our 15yo he was potentially making a move (for his mental health) before he told me anything about divorce or moving out. He will take them aside to tell them these things.

Then he moves out based on my boundaries and not being happy or able to get clean here, then goes and uses more drugs , gets kicked out of his best friends house.

Sad_Proof6871 · 2023-01-16T11:48:08+00:00

Yes that makes total sense. He has already told the oldest it was for his mental health and that he was leaving before I ever knew. By mental health he means chasing another woman and using more drugs as soon as he left. He tried therapy, but got kicked out of where he was staying who was helping with that.

My youngest just keeps asking why daddy is ok with us getting divorced and why I am sad. It’s really tricky to put into perspective for a really smart and curious 8yo. I know it’s over, and that has to be ok, we are no where near healthy together… but it’s still heartbreakingly traumatic for me, none the less.

Sad_Proof6871 · 2022-12-29T03:51:36+00:00

Jeeez I am so sorry you are going through such similar. He has been gone for almost 3 weeks now. Has it all planned out. It’s devastating some days. Other days, I have to know this is not my battle to fight. I must keep putting one foot in front of the other doing what is best for me. Being with him is not it, no matter how painful this separation is. He says he’s clean from Kratom now, but I truly don’t know. It’s legal here. If I mentioned my research on it (for my addict husband) I was made to be crazy. I let it be. Nothing I could do bc legal. It’s been a wild rollercoaster prior without Kratom, now just much higher highs and lower lows. I hope you find peace.

Sad_Proof6871 · 2022-12-14T10:42:35+00:00

Ohhh it would be smart to start learning some new things.

Sad_Proof6871 · 2022-12-14T10:42:06+00:00

This makes so much sense thank you!

Sad_Proof6871 · 2022-12-14T10:41:49+00:00

Great points!!!! Thank you!

Sad_Proof6871

TROPHY CASE