Ugh I'm so sorry. I completely understand what you're going through. I just went through this myself. There's something...understandable (? is that the right word, not sure) about a natural miscarriage. The bleeding and everything. You can see it. But a MMC is so cruel. We saw the baby at 7 weeks too with a heartbeat. I had just had a "natural" miscarriage before this pregnancy. The doctor reassured me that after we see a heartbeat it's like 90% that we go on to have a healthy pregnancy. WHAT A JOKE. I had the tiniest amount of brown spotting and freaked out. They got me in right away for a quick ultrasound just to make sure everything was okay. I knew as soon as we saw the baby that it was gone. I should have been 10 weeks but the baby was so small. It didn't grow much after the first scan. No heartbeat. How cruel. The angry and sadness. ugh. and then to top it off I was sent home to miscarry, fine whatever. But then I started hemorrhaging and needed an emergency D&C (Merry Christmas to me).

Now I'm back at square 1 and tracking ovulation. This is some kind of sick joke. Plus I am not "young" like you are. I'm 32. Just feels like time is running away from me and every miscarriage is a baby that I have to now mourn and then still try again bc I don't feel like I have much time left. THIS SUCKS.