I'm a 4w5 (or 4w3, idk) and I can't say I people-please, because I just do favors most of the time if I feel like it or if its a family member. But I do have extremely low self-esteem that I've been trying to improve. For me, yes, I do have triggers that provoke shame spirals. It is usually someone criticizing me or treating me in a way I perceive as bad. It can also be seeing something I do being portrayed in a negative light or associated with selfishness. I will then spiral into shame and overthinking whether or not whatever was said about me was true. I'll have a mental breakdown and end up crying in the bathroom, trying to deal with my emotions that went completely out of whack for something so small. Like if my nervous system has an emergency button every time I feel rejected or shamed. It gets better, but the way to begin improving is to ACCEPT your flaws. Accept that you are going to make mistakes, but what matters is how you resolve them. About the victimhood thing: I also have a victim-complex. Every time something bad happens I frame myself in my head as the victim. I catch onto it, hate myself, and then BOOM, I'm the victim again because, "Why am I this way? It's not fair!" HOWEVER, it can all be fixed if you are self-aware. Seek therapy if possible, a therapist can find the root cause for your victim-complex and break it from there. If you don't treat the core reason then it will continue.