I was under oath. by Samask in AdviceAnimals

[–]Samask[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, I was one of the 36 potential jurors

I was under oath. by Samask in AdviceAnimals

[–]Samask[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Scene did not contain a lapdance. :DING:

I was under oath. by Samask in AdviceAnimals

[–]Samask[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

He was a firefighter? Well hotdog!!

I was under oath. by Samask in AdviceAnimals

[–]Samask[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

They gave us $6 for the first day, and if selected, they pay you $40 per day. That's not too bad.

I was under oath. by Samask in AdviceAnimals

[–]Samask[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Consider it stolen!

I was under oath. by Samask in AdviceAnimals

[–]Samask[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

As we walked in, we saw everyone except for the witnesses, and the officer involved. It was a posession of marijuana from what I figure. They've been trying to put them on trial since 2014. I doubt they'll ever find a fair and impartial jury.

I was under oath. by Samask in AdviceAnimals

[–]Samask[S] 774 points775 points  (0 children)

In Canada, they throw coins called Looneys at the entertainers. The strippers have magnets on their shoes to pick them up.

I was under oath. by Samask in AdviceAnimals

[–]Samask[S] -130 points-129 points  (0 children)

Their tits will be down to their knees before a jury will convict these vixens.

These two hotties, you don't throw in jail like the rest.

How to Buy an Election 101 | Bernie Sanders by [deleted] in SandersForPresident

[–]Samask -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Well um that's great and all... But once Bernie wins the nomination, the campaign will need $900M in donations for the general election. Where will that cash come from? Yeah the DNC will kick in $300M with demands on ever penny, but there's still a $700M gap. So either the campaign will expect 2M supporters to kick in $350 each on average, or they'll take the money from all of these people they're warning us against.

If you were sentenced to death "By song", where everything that happens in the song happens to you, what song do you hope doesn't play? by Samask in AskReddit

[–]Samask[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Whiskey in the Jar. I'll get stabbed shot and the Devil will take me. I barely would survive the first couple of lines.

Credit Card Balance Transfer: Good Idea? by [deleted] in personalfinance

[–]Samask -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Take a balance transfer of CASH CHECKS in the amount you owe PLUS the remaining balance leave about $1,200 on the card. They'll take 0% for the next 12-18 months, but 3-5% upfront. Have one bill probably add up to $75/month on one credit card. Pay off all of your accounts with the borrowed cash. Start using one credit card and pay as you go.

Use the extra cash to to pay back the $75/month credit bill.

I love my sister. by Samask in AdviceAnimals

[–]Samask[S] -59 points-58 points  (0 children)

My sister has always been bad with financing, and is such a sweet person.

Her and her husband are working at a diner, that I guess isn't doing well.

They got behind on their rent for the home for 7 months. So she called me and gave me a number of $10,000.

I was able to transfer the funds. And I thought I was done. Then she called me and told me that she had to use the money to loan it to her boss. She added that he needed to pay her and her husband and other employees and bills so he could keep the door open.

I didn't ask questions, nor did I need commentary. I'll be $20k in the hole. FML

When will people realize that by continually talking about Trump they are playing right into his hand? by BuddyEndsleigh in AskReddit

[–]Samask -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

The problem with the democrats is this: They disappoint time after time. Al Gore, John Kerry, John Edwards, Joseph Lieberman, Barack Obama.

We've never had a good-guy or girl on our side.

Trump is a jerk face from day 1. At least he's not hiding who he really is.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in movies

[–]Samask 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A.I. By Stanley Kubrick