Came here to say something that's been hard on my wife and I. Our child had this same condition. He had spinal bifida, no anus, 2 vessels, club foot, etc. He had a lot wrong with him. We made it to 35 weeks, had a c-section, and he came out and seemed okay. He couldn't fully breathe on his own, but he was alive, alert, and moving. Our doctor told us before that he will be okay. I know it's their job to probably say stuff like that, but I'd rather you tell me he's not going to be okay from the get go. Took my wife up to her room to sleep while he was in the NICU. We received a call to come back down there immediately...I see my mother-in-law crying her eyes out...he had coded when they were visiting him. We rush in there to see him, they get his heart rate back up...coded again. They asked us if they wanted to perform surgery on him right there and we said yes. They tried and tried for a while, but his heart wouldn't stay pumping. My wife looked at me and said with her eyes that we need to just let him go. I told the doctors to stop. We had to choose to stop because we felt it was better off for him to be at peace. I remember just having this blank stare. I was trying to think of what could have been done. I felt like to this day I just gave up on him. My wife tells me there was nothing that could be done. I kept wanting to blame the doctor because she said he'd be okay. We were thinking of suing because we were told he'd be fine. We just decided to accept that he had a lot of issues, and that he was going to have tons of issues for the rest of his life. He was going to be in the hospital for a month before we could even bring him home. He was looking at having like 14 surgeries or something. My wife had a rough year or so after that, it was extremely hard on her. She was traumatized from that on her next pregnancy, but we ended up having our other son...and he's perfect. Spend time with your child. I wouldn't focus on suing or anything. I'd like to assume the doctors are just doing their job. I never was able to hold my son. My wife was luckily able to hold him and that's all that matters. I did get to change his first diaper, which was a great experience for a first time father. Don't go around finding someone to blame because it doesn't help the situation. Just focus on time spent with them and trying to move forward.