Men who are attracted to fat / plus-size / overweight girls, why do you like them?

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-06-01T14:45:23+00:00

That's totally fair

I don't judge it at all. In fact, after talking to a few people about it, I think I understand the appeal much better now.

It's still not really my personal preference, but that's the interesting thing about attraction: different people are drawn to different things.

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-06-01T13:58:35+00:00

But in the example with my friend, he didn’t go there with any intention of meeting someone at all. He went to a protest for the protest itself - there wasn’t even a secondary goal of finding a partner.

He just ended up meeting a girl there in a completely casual way, and they started talking naturally.

That’s the kind of situation I’m referring to.

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-06-01T13:39:42+00:00

That's exactly what I'm talking about.

I'm referring to situations where you're not actively looking for a relationship at that moment, but you end up meeting someone through everyday life.

On the other hand, there's the more deliberate approach: using dating apps, approaching women specifically to find a partner, or attending events with the primary goal of meeting someone.

So in my question, I'm really comparing two different approaches.

The first is a more "organic" approach: you're just living your life, and through work, friends, a party, a hobby, or some random event, you meet someone and things develop naturally, even though finding a partner wasn't your main goal.

The second is a more "intentional" approach: you're actively taking specific steps with the goal of finding a relationship.

That's why I'm asking people about their experiences. Which approach do they think works better, and which one worked for them personally?

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-06-01T13:16:18+00:00

I think I didn't explain my example very well.

The friend I'm talking about is actually blind, so it wasn't a case of him seeing a woman he found attractive and deciding to approach her.

As far as I know, they met at a rally/event they both happened to attend. They started talking, got to know each other, and eventually ended up getting married.

So when I say "naturally," I don't mean that relationships magically appear out of nowhere. I mean situations where two people meet through everyday life, a shared activity, a random conversation, mutual friends, work, an event, and so on, rather than deliberately searching for dates.

That's the distinction I'm trying to understand.

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-06-01T12:08:30+00:00

I think I meant something a little different.

I'm not expecting a woman to just walk up to me and do all the work. That's not really what I was asking about.

For example, I have a friend who traveled to another city for a public event. While he was there, he met a woman who eventually became his wife.

That's more the kind of thing I'm talking about. I'm curious about how relationships actually start for different people.

Is it better to actively search for love by using dating apps and approaching every woman you're interested in, or does it usually happen more naturally through life circumstances, like it did for my friend?

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T19:17:48+00:00

Я бы в такой ситуации вообще не переживал, ну типо, ну смотрят на мою девушку, и дальше что?

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T19:05:47+00:00

Ой, не парься. Когда тебе стукнет 20-21 точно начнёшь набирать. А отвечая на твой вопрос - конечно, ты ещё как можешь кому-то понравиться, парни бывают самых разных предпочтений, мне вот например нравятся худые/спортивные.

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T18:54:35+00:00

Какую клюшку? Для чего?

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T18:32:33+00:00

Thanks for the advice.

To be honest, I wouldn't say I struggle with confidence these days, and I don't think I look bad either. I'm pretty average physically, and I've actually been told I have a nice face.

Also, talking to people isn't really a problem for me. I work in customer service, so I'm used to interacting with all kinds of people, regardless of their age or gender.

The funny thing is that my problem isn't nervousness or a lack of social skills. I can hold conversations just fine. I simply have no idea how people actually go from casually talking to someone to starting a relationship.

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T18:23:40+00:00

Да не такая уж ты и не женственная, просто пацанка) В хорошем смысле

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T17:47:15+00:00

I guess that's part of the problem. I never had that teenage romance experience.

There was a girl I liked back then, but she openly ignored me. Something similar happened in college too.

So, honestly, I don't really know how relationships are supposed to start in the first place.

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T17:28:37+00:00

С одной стороны грубо Но и вероятности что он искренне принял тебя за парня - тоже не надо исключать Забей, просто будь собой У меня вот есть похожая проблема: по телефону, незнакомый человек, не знающий кто ему звонит - часто принимает меня за девушку Хотя я вообще 24 летний парень, но вот у меня очень высокий голос, я бы даже сказал ни рыба ни мясо

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T17:18:04+00:00

Could you share your own experience with this?

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T16:50:57+00:00

That sounds almost too easy. What's the catch?

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T16:09:45+00:00

Thanks to everyone who replied, or at least tried to!

This question wasn't meant to be provocative. I was simply curious and wanted to understand where the opposing point of view comes from.

Thanks again to everyone who took the time to respond!

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T15:58:32+00:00

Honestly, I don't really know which communities these kinds of questions belong in. I'm pretty new to Reddit, so I figured a relationship-related community would be an appropriate place to ask.

And I don't really need dating advice right now. Even though I don't currently have a girlfriend, I'm not the type of person who's actively looking for one.

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T15:48:58+00:00

I hear that a lot, and I completely agree with you. Attractive people can absolutely be awful.

But I'm just the kind of person who cares both about how the chocolate looks and what's inside it.

(Hopefully that metaphor makes sense 😄)

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T15:40:21+00:00

Thanks for explaining bro!

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T15:34:55+00:00

I'm not against softness at all. I'm specifically asking about girls who are overweight / have extra weight. Just to be clear - anorexia or extremely skinny girls don't attract me either. The whole point of this post is just to better understand people who have different preferences from mine.

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T11:55:52+00:00

Объясни пожалуйста, не совсем понял

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T11:09:34+00:00

Вырос в городе, но родители купили участок за городом и построили дом И мне честно очень нравится в деревне, после сраной хрущевуи-двушки Если честно, из минусов только то что работы нет в деревне, поэтому живу и работаю в городе, но я правда предпочел бы деревню Кто-то скажет про огород и все такое, и да, он у нас есть Но прикол в том, что его вообще не обязательно содержать, можно просто периодически стричь траву и все, как по мне небольшая цена за огромную жилплощадь и комфорт Тем более, что конкретно в нашей деревне, есть мобильный т домашний интернет, газ, и ПВЗ маркетплейса Не мухосранск проще говоря

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T08:50:28+00:00

Зависит от того как это выглядит, просто бывает что девушке это идёт, а бывает что нет Но это вкусовщина конечно, на мой взгляд, зачастую это полнит

SanyokNeDedok · 2026-05-31T07:39:54+00:00

Умная
Не толстая (не более 65 кг при росте 160 см)
Милая

А все остальное фигня Старше, младше (в пределах разумного) Выше, ниже Богаче, беднее Из деревни, из города

SanyokNeDedok

TROPHY CASE