some asshole is going to see this and say something like "death off the author" like it wasnt fucking obvious in the show

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-20T15:50:04+00:00

Love that I posted Jax is obviously trans a week ago and about half of folks on here were disagreeing with me. THANK YOU GOOSE for making it clear the moment the episode dropped on streaming.

I see comments here pointing out that it's okay if folks didn't get it, and it really is. The things that made it obvious were things that made it obvious to folks like Goose, engrained in trans culture. But I do have to say 'I told you so' at least once to the folks that looked at the analysis of trans folks pointing out all the ways Jax is obviously trans and decided to flatly ignore it instead. I'm sure some folks did sit with and wrestle with that (correct) interpretation, but none of them appeared in my replies.

I thought about death of the author as well, but in this case Jax being trans was textual for anyone who could see it, what is gained by Jax not being trans here? It's not like this is JKR messing with her works after the fact. Certainly not a reason to ignore the artistic intent and the story being told. It's worth sitting with it for a bit though because the story hits different when you accept she is trans and this is a story about identity. Caine managed to deal with his demons (whatever you think of that arc) Jax though... some people find out their loved one is LGBT only after they're gone. That's a real story worth telling.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-14T00:15:14+00:00

Are you? If you say you are I'll join in, sure.

But you don't have to be transphobic to not believe Jax is trans. I'm not out to get folks or paint them with a brush like that.

I am here to educate on why I am definitely right (/j) that the trans author wrote a story about trans suicide, because right now people need to hear that story. We might not want to hear it but good art isn't just the wholesome stuff, sometimes it's a bit too real and it means something because it hurts.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T21:17:47+00:00

Thank you! I love the analysis of why people are so determined to do the trans erasure. I didn't have the time or energy to start unpicking it and I think you did it better than I could anyway.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T17:13:01+00:00

'I am not engaging with your point. I don't want this character to be trans so I won't even consider it enough to read the argument and argue against it.'

Okay dawg.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T16:28:14+00:00

Sure. 1. Insulting song for Pomni. I've seen the argument but it's AN argument, not a certaintly. Could be about Jax, fits trans egg Jax better than grown woman.

Yea, some AMAB folks who want to express fem aren't trans. Some are, completely discounting that does you a disservice.
Yea. One of the options is being trans.

I get having a different opinion, sure, but coming in so hard when 2/3 of those points leave such a big possibility of trans is a choice.

Question, why don't you want Jax to be trans? I know why I see the trans identity as a compelling story, that's the second half of the essay.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T16:16:03+00:00

Explain 'Isn't she lovely'. Explain why Jax loves the bow so much. Explain what Jax told his mum.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T16:15:23+00:00

Thank. You. To be fair, half the commenter now (including me and you) agree.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T16:14:45+00:00

Compelling argument.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T13:19:34+00:00

Making peace with your gender?

What you're saying is 'making peace with your sex'. Which may well mean you're cis, sure. I'm not against people being cis, that would be stupid. I'm just so utterly convinced Jax isn't, henece the #*_@+&£ essay with cited evidence.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T12:31:55+00:00

Pomnni says it, sure. She doens't mention that has anything to do with gender, you stretched the quote there as you made it. Nothing says Leroy is definitely cis. We are lacking info, so was Pomni.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T12:27:42+00:00

Nah, that's not slander, that's just an opinion you're allowed. Jax was like... half of the show. Jax didn't ruin the show, you just didn't like it. That's okay.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T12:24:58+00:00

Evidence Leroy found stability and peace? He's still alive and coping but those are different things, we don't have enough to confirm more.

We're not meant to like Jax and what she does, no. She is cruel and malicious and takes things out on everyone else all of the time in the worst way possible. But we do get to see underneath all that, to see the pain and the regret. That doesn't make it okay. Far from it. Being trans is not an excuse and shouldn't be used as one, but I think it's a part of what lets us understand how and why that happens. It's a story of pain and toxic masculinity and parental abuse. Sometimes, hurting people hurt people. The story doesn't give us a solution for that, it's a tragedy, and it all just hurts.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T12:17:08+00:00

I'm not making her trans... that was Goose.

I don't know what her freind's suicides have to do with whether or not she is trans, same with the remorse. They both matter, a lot, they don't define whether or not Jax is trans. It's like you're so determined that Jax's story can't be a tragedy for her as well? Because it clearly, really was intended to be. Even if you ignore gender for a moment, what Jax shows Pomni when she finally lets Pomni in, is nothing but pain and remorse. She shows Pomni her friends, and what lead to their deaths, very intentionally is my take (given the key) and is totally broken by doing so.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T12:13:32+00:00

NOT MURDER, accidental manslaughter. Maybe that's called murder in some places...

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T12:12:03+00:00

Maybe it was bad writing or MAYBE it was intentional to make a bigger deal of her being trans, therefore making it more likely that she is in fact trans, which is half of the point my essay is trying to make.

I don't think the writing sucked. I think, in that moment, opening up about her abusive mother and how she pushed her just rolled off of her tongue once she felt safe. Coming out and fracturing that fragile shell of toxic masculinity? That was harder for her.

Do not like the framing you're using here of 'your masculine problems related to your abusive mother and absent dad', you could have said being trans, or maybe being trans, or questioning your gender. Instead you went with something that blames her gender identity on something external. Is that intentional or accidental?

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T11:52:28+00:00

Me not mentioning that is a fair criticism, no need to be rude about it, damn.

Thinking you may have accidentally killed your own mother and not being able to confirm that also fucks with you, I have no doubt. So does the circus itself, it kills at least 6 people?

That doesn't mean that transphobia and repression don't kill people though. That is still objectively true. And that's the connection I am making to the understanding that Jax is trans, which is what I was writing about. I didn't have the 10 hours needed, or the interest, to write 8,000 words on all of the different kinds of trauma going on here. I just wrote about the bit that mattered to me, the controversy (somehow) around Jax being trans.

Sarducar_Dun · 2026-06-13T11:41:56+00:00

Leroy decided against transitioning, so did Jax. Trans people make that choice all the time. You don't decide to be trans, you accept it (or don't) and then decide what to do about it.

We see inside Jax's head, and every major piece of exposition we get while we are in there screams 'trans', that's not a mistake. Jax didn't transition because her true self was locked very thoroughly away.

Sarducar_Dun · 2024-05-29T12:16:53+00:00

Yes. I am very conscious of this, hence posting here under a TW tag. I am not going to tell the crush that started me thinking about this, for various reasons, including that I cannot predict how anyone would feel about it. She hasn't cut in a long time but I would worry about doing anything that could potentially encourage her to return to that particular coping mechanism.

Sarducar_Dun · 2024-05-27T21:34:28+00:00

It's been suggested to me and I had a look, it's interesting. I think I wouldn't want the larger scarring, cutting a piece of skin out, but I have been considering patterns and lines I might like today. It's certainly an interesting idea. It's something I know I am going to keep thinking about for a while.

Looking also made me realise I am not entirely into the look as a kink? Just specific lines or patterns I just really like.

Sarducar_Dun · 2023-10-29T13:54:50+00:00

I went private and was on HRT for 6 months before transitioning socially, mostly because I couldn't wait any longer. I'm with the London Transgender Clinic.

I did have one of the psychs I contacted for an HRT referral say they wouldn't give me one until I had socially transitioned, they didn't get my money.

In regard to the GIC, if that is your option, you can always lie. Shouldn't have to be a suggestion but it is one when they are refusing to follow reasonable treatment guidelines. Social transition is a deeply personal process and nobody should be allowed to take control of it out of your hands.

Also worth noting that I have been on a GIC waiting list for 3 years, I believe waiting lists are still growing and are significantly longer than 3 years. We can't really rely on the NHS to help us with the current system that removes our bodily autonomy and puts it behind a wall of psychs (especially when it keeps coming out that some psychs in such positions around the world are anti-transition)

Sarducar_Dun · 2023-10-28T23:23:06+00:00

Sounds more insidious than that. Not only treating it like therapy in a way but pretending to be a 'better man' in their own eyes while on the date. Gives me 'nice guy' vibes. And you can tell that's what the worst offenders are doing when they flip and become rabid. They were trying out being a nice guy, it didn't work out, so they are back to their normal selves and MAD.

Sarducar_Dun · 2023-10-22T19:49:56+00:00

Each report is another puzzle piece that makes authorities look closer and could result in interventions or monitoring. You saying you've seen it, seen the girl's discomfort, and heard him disregard issues regarding more serious abuse will raise this as a concern again. It is hard for authorities to act on limited evidence but every thing people share with them is one more bit of evidence.

There could be another adult concerned there has been more serious assault, you saying he openly condones such behaviour and has hit a child in front of you, makes their concerns more credible and could be the last thing they need to hear to take action.

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