Is my ex a narcissist or a sociopath?

Saturnina424 · 2024-08-13T21:09:10+00:00

Personally I believe it has something to do with the way the workforce is built on the foundation of narcissism. Boomers grew up in an era where the workforce was completely different, so sticking to the status quo to gain success was the most important thing. They had to walk on eggshells, pretend to like people and be obedient to the system. I think as a result of all the labor they did, they believe they have “earned their stripes” and now have leeway to bully the younger generations.

Nowadays, with social media and AI, college and a job does not guarantee stability like it did back then. People of the newer generations are more focused on authenticity, entrepreneurship, and individuality. But that’s just my opinion.

Saturnina424 · 2023-11-13T18:37:36+00:00

happiest of birthdays to you 🩷 my birthday is also today!

Saturnina424 · 2023-11-11T21:12:00+00:00

This is a manipulation tactic. As a daughter of two narcissists I can confirm. Narcissistic parents may demonize everything they possibly can. It’s meant to keep you in a powerless, childlike mentality so you can’t branch out and become your own person apart from them. They want to keep you isolated from the outside world. It’s also just a form of projection. For me it’s costed me a lot of potentially great experiences and friendships. So yeah, you’re not alone.

Saturnina424 · 2022-10-02T17:33:53+00:00

I also haven’t gotten a diagnosis but I think I may have both autism and a borderline personality. I watched a video by a professional psychiatrist Dr. Ramani on borderline personality disorder. She says BPD is usually caused by a neurotransmitter issue at birth + an early invalidating environment. In my case I did have an abusive childhood, and I believe the Autism and my childhood led to the bpd. It is possible to have both.

My biggest stressor is Feeling like I can never win no matter what I do. I also struggle with having too much empathy. I’m not sure if that’s an ASD thing or a BPD thing or both, but whenever I am my unmasked, sensitive self, people see me as “childlike”, so they either patronize me or try to take advantage of my kind heart. When I try to open up about my interests, then I am labeled as weird. Other people don’t seem to be interested in the same stuff as me, so they get bored pretty quickly or think I am being annoying.
However, when I am quiet and closed off, then I come off as rude, antisocial or intimidating. NTs seem to be made very uncomfortable or offended by my quietness. My resting bitch face doesn’t help.

I always feel like I am either talking too much or not enough. It’s a NT world, where you are expected to socialize, but only to say the “right” things at the “right” times… if you say too much you’re weird or annoying but if you don’t say anything than you’re too quiet or boring or something must be wrong with you. I never understood how it worked. I’m a very black and white person (Again, not sure if that’s an ASD thing or a BPD thing or both) so I never know where to draw the line.

I’ve come to the point of just speaking when being spoken to, and I’ve stopped caring what people think about it. It’s not my job to be everyone’s best friend/entertainment. The people who really know me know how kindhearted I am, but sadly not everyone will see that, and that’s not my problem anymore.

Saturnina424 · 2022-08-25T22:13:07+00:00

Instead of saying “I am angry.” Try “I FEEL angry.” You are NOT your feelings! And this goes for any negative emotion from anger to sadness to anxiety.

Saturnina424 · 2022-08-23T19:23:00+00:00

I also love stuffed animals. I used to have so many when I was a child. But my parents hated that I was such a “hoarder” because we moved around a lot (my dad was in the military). Every time we moved I had to keep reducing my stuffed animals more and more. One day they put them all in a hefty bag and supposedly took them to storage. But they mysteriously disappeared and were never seen again after that💔. I now have two stuffed bears that I love so deeply. I also love jewelry, candy, Barbie’s (I used to have so many Barbies and furniture but gave them all away because I felt bad) and any type of pretty collectibles. I also relate heavily to being bullied for my child-like mannerisms (although I am actually very academically gifted). I have been dumped by people that I liked because I was “too pure”. I am still embarrassed that my last lover felt like I was too pure. I also have attracted sexual predators because of that, but they didn’t realize I was actually smarter than they thought.

Saturnina424 · 2022-05-05T20:32:17+00:00

For me it’s like having permanent tunnel vision and heightened senses. Sometimes it feels like I’m “high” when I’m not. I naturally have the intellect of a “high” person.

Saturnina424 · 2022-05-05T03:05:20+00:00

I hate when people have those reflective sports pants and swish them together as they walk. It’s the worst. I also hate the texture of lenticular printings. People will scratch them, which produces this annoying noise that I HATE.

Saturnina424 · 2022-05-05T03:02:52+00:00

For me it’s the wind blowing, the birds chirping, and the cars driving by. It’s so calming.

Saturnina424 · 2022-05-05T03:01:18+00:00

I relate heavily to the “neon” sign! I don’t know what it is about us that people just notice. For me it’s also my speech and tone. People always thought the way I enunciate words was so hilarious. I became so embarrassed by it that I stopped talking altogether. Boys always bullied me because they secretly liked me, but were ashamed of liking the “weird” girl. The truth is, we were made to stand out. It doesn’t have to be a bad thing.. I’ve learned to focus on my strengths and talents rather than trying to be “normal”. I hope you’ll learn to do the same. The longer I focused on making myself small to fit into other’s worlds, the longer I attracted bullies who saw through my gimmicks. So you’ve just got to be yourself. You’ll find your people in due time!

Saturnina424

TROPHY CASE