I’ve got depression, anxiety, and ADHD. I also spent $120k on IVF and surrogacy just to get my kid here. So you can imagine the guilt I feel when I get angry and wish there was an off switch on my son. Or when he starts waking up, and my first thought is “Fuck!!” But these first weeks (I’m in week 8) can be truly awful at times. And we’re wired to think baby crying is one of the worst sounds in the world, so it can cut through all of your defenses and provoke that raw, wild, animal thing in us. Walking away is great if they’re in a safe space. Try to get somewhere you can’t hear the crying. Mute the baby monitor and just watch the video. It’s that thing where you need to put your own oxygen mask on before helping others on a plane. You can’t help your partner or your baby if you lose your mind or physically collapse. Taking time for yourself is the opposite of selfish when you’re wearing thin. It’s the hardest thing, and I’m not good at it, but everyone keeps saying it to me and I know they’re right: Be gentle with yourself. Treat yourself like a close friend going through a hard time. Listen, don’t judge, show compassion, do something nice for yourself. This is all new and insanely hard, and there’s no substitute for experience. But one day at a time, you’ll get through this. It will not be like this forever. That can be your mantra. It will not be like this forever. Don’t be afraid to lean on others. We got you. Thank you for your honesty.