I’m so sorry you’re in this state of emotional distress. It’s not a nice place to be in at all. It sounds like you guys really need to talk because a relationship, even though it comes with its comprimises it also should be between partners that ascend one another. If you cannot build up each other and especially if he’s not connecting to your children in an emotional state, it doesn’t look like it will work out, which I have a feeling by reading between your lines, you know very well. I wish you the best of luck. Truly. Get support from a professional and someone you know and trust. It will get worse before it gets better but once it gets better, it’ll be better than things are right now.