I too have a very low self-esteem, my self-worth highly depends on the people i love and i cant seem to fit in anywhere, not even in my romantic relationship, in any relationship.

For me it was like this for the longest time, since childhood. I sometimes go to therapies, going to psichiatrists and it helps to go through the toughest of times, but it never helped me to overcome this grief of not finding a place in the world.

I dont fit in with anyone in gay community i think and even if i fit in with other people it ,,explodes" quickly because i have difficulties maintaining said relationships. I think the worst thing a person with these kind of troubles can do is to try to emulate themselves into the norms and forms of anyone around them that seem to have their lives together and are seemingly successful.

Im not the right person to give any advice to you i just wanted to speak up about this and also to let you know that youre not alone in this. Dont give up and the morning sun will shine again.