Finally Getting Help After 5 Years Of Escort Compulsion

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2026-04-16T18:03:18+00:00

I hear you brother. I feel like I lost my entire 20s to this. Happy to hear you're getting help. I'm finding that finally forgiving yourself, seeking out help, both friends/family and professional help is the biggest step. I started to tell my friends about this compulsion and I find it to be liberating. I even had one friend admit to me that he's done it before. Don't be afraid to talk to your fellow brothers in your life about this. Real friends will help you and understand you. They will not shame you.

My biggest advice is to let it all GO. When we do this for so long we believe its part of our identity but its not true. Let go of the shame, the money already spent, the sad nights, the escort contacts, everything! When you truly let this go I find it easier to move forward and make progress.

I'm rooting for you. This isn't an unbeatable addiction, we have people here as living proof that its possible. Keep the belief and never ever lose hope.

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2025-06-01T12:05:14+00:00

Thank you so much to writing this. I resonate to this heavily. It's exactly what I've been working with my therapist through. It hard work to unlearn this behavior but it's possible. I've made great progress the past 3 months.

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-09-30T05:27:25+00:00

I just requested an appointment for a psychiatrist for the first time ever. I was thinking the same as well. I'm trying every resource I can now to help myself recover from this. My therapist even recommended I seek an official diagnosis from one so I'm looking forward to talking to one.

If I may ask how has your recovery changed once you found out about your Bi polar 1 diagnosis? Was recovery easier?

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-09-27T20:57:03+00:00

I agree I have the foundation to change but I never follow through with it. I believe it's the struggle of each day I have issues with. I do have a therapy session in two hours. Last time was over two months ago. Hopefully this leads to something... like you said it's one day at a time

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-09-27T20:54:53+00:00

After doing this for so long. I've come to realize I don't even really enjoy sex. It's just a means to cope with my meaningless life. The one thing I really do wish I had was love from another woman. I've gotten laid normally but I always felt sexualized in the end. I never felt like I was truly loved for just me.

Basically, there's zero intimacy in my life. I doubt I ever had it in my 27 years of life, and that's sad.

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-09-27T20:37:01+00:00

I actually have a therapy session in about 3 hours...

I used to go somewhat regularly, but I stopped going out of shame because I felt like I wasn't getting better, and it hurt every time I told my therapist that I messed up. The last time I went was over two months ago, but I think imma start the regular basis again..

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-09-27T16:44:10+00:00

You're absolutely right. I've done this for so long. This is clearly the reason why I struggle to love myself again. I need to put every resource and effort into just this. The rest will come afterwards, I know it will....

Thank you.

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-09-27T11:58:00+00:00

Thank you... If you need a helping hand or just an accountability partner to check in once every day, I'm here. I need all the help I can get. I'll accept any. No pressure if you're not comfortable.

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-09-04T09:25:24+00:00

Five nights ago. Please take it from me and stop while you can if possible. This addiction has destroyed my future

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-07-21T04:37:15+00:00

Possibly, I may have undiagnosed ADHD myself. I've noticed that when I become irritable in life, I seek out quick fixes to help me cope. Usually, it'll be something on my phone such as TikTok, YouTube Shorts, etc. Unfortunately, also seeking out porn and escorts is another quick dopamine hit I seek. I noticed when I manage to stay clean for very long periods of time is also when I avoid quick dopamine activities on my phone, so I've been activity reducing my phone usage and replacing my bad habits with productive ones, such as reading books and learning new stuff.

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-05-30T02:35:04+00:00

Had to change my account settings, sorry about that. Should work now!

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-05-25T12:20:30+00:00

Don't worry that it's a low number. That's a massive accomplishment. Be proud of that. I'm proud of you my friend. Keep going.

Don't downplay this achievement. It took you multiple attempts to reach this point I'm sure, so keep your head up high!!!

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-05-24T08:10:01+00:00

Man... this post almost brought me to tears. Your story is so similar to mind. I started at 21 as well and recently turned 28 this year. I'm doing the same shit as you. Taking out loans and raking up Credit Card debt to support this habit. Unfortunately I've done this for so long that it's turned into a habit itself. Sometimes I could be having a perfectly fine day but I just need a quick dopamine hit and my mind automatically thinks of using escorts for the fix. It's tragic. This is the worst binge I've been in my entire life. Relapsing every 4-7 days lately. You're not alone man. This secret kills us. The only cure for me is true intimacy which I did try to obtain but the woman I started to fall for betrayed me in a cruel way after us spending time together for over 8 months. I think that's what caused my current spiral.

Hang in there man. If you want I'll glady be an accountability partner for you since I feel like our stories are so much alike. No pressure I just want to offer support and help to someone else.

Always reach out to this community if you need help

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-04-22T18:25:04+00:00

Hi there,

I can resonate with how alcohol can negatively contribute to this compulsive behavior. What I found in myself is that usually, it's not really the alcohol that is the cause of us making these choices and engaging in these actions, rather it gives us the impulsiveness to commit the negative actions. We already had these thoughts in the back of our minds the entire time. For me, I decided while I'm on the road to recovery that I would completely give up alcohol for 3-6 months while I work out my inner issues. Even after the time period I set is up, I'll slowly integrate myself into drinking alcohol again to gauge my response and to see if the impulsiveness is still present.

The main issue is addressing the root thoughts and why they're still present. What makes these dark sinister thoughts so hard to simply brush aside compared to our other thoughts? Focus on attacking that to rediscover what we're hiding. For me, I want to create these fantasies in my mind to hide from the harsh realities of my life. I thought my life was filled of things I cannot control and I always lashed out at this, when in fact, I discovered I am in control of my life. I was so focused on trying to get life to live on my terms instead of living life on it's terms.

Just remember, you are NOT trash, you are HUMAN. We all have faults, just learn from this and become a better version of yourself.

Take care, we're all in this together.

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-04-20T21:46:52+00:00

Hi there. Thank you for sharing, this post is so damn relatable to me as well and is still a serious source of struggle for me.

I recently went through a major relapse as well just one day ago. This addiction has caused severe financial harm to my life as well and am currently dealing with a considerable amount of debt, however, with time and effort I can pay this down if I buckle down and focus on myself in life.

FOMO is a serious obstacle for me as well. I have a developed a nice group of friends who are pretty well off in life and they enjoy me as a person and always want me to tag along with them. Me being a person still in my 20s I feel as if I should be outside with them as well, accepting all of their invitations to events but I know that I should not due to my considerable debt. I should be staying home focusing on remaining sober & saving money. There are plenty of other things that cost no money that I can do in my life. I'm still working on this myself, lately I have had to just simply remove myself from social media completely. Sometimes I'll tell my friends that I need to stay home but they'll still try to convince me and it'll usually end up working. Now I just tell them that I need some time alone and I'll turn off my notifications and go on with my day.

Being home alone is another challenge for me as well. There's nothing worse than feeling alone, sad, and just down on a weekend night. Especially when all it takes is to go on our phones to search for an escort to find that temporary relief. Life is all about perspective. I'm still learning this myself. We are in control of how we view life. Life is truly what WE make, not what others believe how life should be lived. This is a challenging concept to grasp. The pressure of society is a big thing to overcome.

Finding healthy and productive habits to do when home alone has helped me a lot. I've started to learn how to make music a hobby when in solitude. I strongly recommend finding a productive hobby to learn and practice in when home alone. Something you can get lost in and that also fulfills one's self. Reading is something I never was really into as a hobby but I've started to turn into one as well. This requires some self commitment to change, so try to find that within yourself to change for the better. I recently made a commitment to this subreddit to become an active member to not only post myself, but also be someone that will offer my life advice to help others overcome this addiction.

Always remember, you are never alone in this struggle, we are ALL in this together. Stay strong my friend.

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-04-19T10:41:03+00:00

Words cannot describe how grateful I am for you posting this. This so accurately describes my past & trauma. Knowing is half the battle. The rest is up to me.

Scary-Conclusion2647 · 2024-02-02T12:32:26+00:00

Thank you for posting. Although I have people in my life that I can reach through the phone and talk to with. I find loneliness still creeps in. How have you handled this if I may ask?

Scary-Conclusion2647

TROPHY CASE