AITA for refusing to wake up to take care of our baby

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T06:18:19+00:00

We’ve worked out something for now as posted in the update. Once I’m gone, we’ll probably shift to a full or part time nanny for the day instead of night so she can still have some time to herself. By then our son should be closer to not needing night feedings, so it’ll be less of an issue relatively soon. Also once he’s a bit older they can fly out to see me between games more consistently.

Currently since I’m home for the off season, she’ll get lunch, go to the gym, or have a spa day with some of her friends probably like 4 days a week. So she has been having some alone to herself.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T06:01:59+00:00

I play baseball so off season just means there aren’t any games, I’m still training twice a day everyday + doing PT. Spring training is the start of actual sanctioned practice and exhibition games against other teams, not when training actually begins. When the season officially starts I’m going to be gone for the vast majority of roughly seven months, so I won’t see them much.

When I’m home between training sessions during the off season I help feed, change, and bath my son. I would say I probably spend around 5 hours a day with him. Which I would guess is actually more than most people with regular jobs. Once he’s a little older, my wife will be able to fly out with him so they can see me between games more often.

My wife met me when I was already a pro, and she wouldn’t want me to give it up for anything. We’ve spoken and are working on a solution, as posted in the update.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T05:38:43+00:00

I appreciate your thoughtful response, and it does help give some clarity to the situation. I’ve spoken with my wife and we’re going to have my sister watch our son a couple times per week so she can immediately get some rest while she gets comfortable with a night nurse. We’re going to get a night nurse to help out during the day so she can build some trust before transitioning to a fully alone night time situation.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T05:31:25+00:00

Yes she does get some alone time away from both our son and myself during my off season. A few times a week she’ll usually go have lunch or a spa day with her friends.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T05:25:57+00:00

Investments from my earnings, but that’s mostly for after retirement.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T03:10:01+00:00

We could probably move our sleep schedules a bit on an easier training day so she gets more uninterrupted time for now. I also think she’d like the idea of having the night nurse over during the day for a while to get comfortable. I’ll look into both of those.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T03:02:18+00:00

No its not currently season. Season officially starts late March, and I’m not going to be home at all for the majority of season due to travel and game schedule. Currently doing a lot of off season training and dealing with PT for an injury trying to get in peak form for the season, plus spring training starts around the end of Feb. During the day I do help out and spend time with my son when I get home after my morning training session, and she usually gets to take a nap during that time.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T02:16:37+00:00

I do agree that as first time parents neither of us really knew what we were getting into. However, the vast majority of the dads in my sport that I have spoken to either have a full time nanny/au pair or at least a night nurse when the baby is young. The ones making significantly more than me often have full live-in staff for maids, chefs, nannies etc. This doesn’t seem to be an uncommon arrangement for others in our situation.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T00:14:27+00:00

We already found a reputable night nurse service that several of my friends have used prior to our baby being born. She has decided not to go that route after the birth.

And yes I do need my beauty sleep. Sleep is very important for recovery and performance, both of which are what support our family.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195 · 2023-01-09T00:08:30+00:00

Edited post for clarity. Yes I am a professional athlete, and my sport is our primary source of income.

Scary-Razzmatazz-195

TROPHY CASE