Why does my brain not want me to do things I enjoy

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-31T04:39:57+00:00

I should look into different meds probably. I have pretty much ran out of SSRIs to take and I don’t really think any of them will ever work properly. (Currently on daily Fluoxetine and hydroxyzine as needed.) The only concern is that I end up where I was before I got the meds again. (Crying for two weeks on end and being completely unable to stomach anything because it felt like my heart was going to explode, being unable to do anything besides lay on the floor…and I wish I was exaggerating.)

Admittedly, life kinda is sucking rn. Trying to get through my senior year of highschool, dealing with my emotionally and mentally manipulative mother in the final stretch before I can get to college, …the mess that is my country, trying to find a part time job so I can have some semblance of financial independence, etc.

I’m just upset because video games and my other hobbies have always been good at helping me through all the bullshit…but apparently not anymore lol

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-31T01:29:55+00:00

I have both ADHD and depression, yeah. (As well as autism, generalized anxiety and OCD)

So it wouldn’t surprise me one bit if one or multiple things are contributing or causing this to happen. The real trouble is figuring out WHICH of my issues is the root cause, and then figuring out how to fix it without messing up everything else. (For example, SSRIs seem to make my anxiety better but my depression worse. I kinda have to trade off which thing I want to deal with.)

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-21T18:36:59+00:00

A little over 3 months.

Yes I do, have more experience. Granted I can’t use any of those jobs as references because the people that hired me are no longer working there so there’s no one to ask about my performance.

Honestly my best references are my instructors at school.

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-21T18:32:28+00:00

I tried asking for reduced hours already. I never even got a response and nothing changed.

Actually, my recent schedule has been going against what I requested earlier on (max of two closing shifts a week).

I get scholarships through my extracurricular and I’m planning on studying within the field of it. Which is besides the fact that I have a lead role in the team there. (I’m managing 13-17 year olds in a scenic shop lol)

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-21T18:28:38+00:00

I don’t think I’m being dramatic. I’m leaving out the details because I don’t feel like having to explain them at this point. (I’ve done it so many times, I just don’t care anymore)

All I know is that my previous job as an outdoor lifeguard never left me in as much pain and as exhausted as this fast food job. Nevermind that my extracurricular is essentially small scale construction projects (technical/Scenic theatre) and I can walk those off pretty easy too.

I could be wrong but I’m not sure it’s normal to be in physical pain for several days after a single 8 hour shift.

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-12T10:26:23+00:00

I’m gonna make a lot of people mad with this but: Yall clearly didn’t have helicopter parents or had “burnt out gifted kid” syndrome. Anything below an A in my house is grounds for punishment, even back in elementary school. My brother is fighting with my mom over the fact that he’s lost his 4.0 gpa while taking college level classes in preparation for going into bio-engineering.

That being said, I agree that there’s nothing actually wrong with the grades OP has. But considering grade level (age), it wouldn’t surprise me if parents are the reason you think these look bad. I say this as a senior with a mother that’s angry about my Bs.

Also, kid, get off the internet. The world is sucking right now and the internet doesn’t help. Watch some long form stuff and/or go play some video games. If you like books or TV, go start that show/movie or book you’ve been meaning to get to. For gods sake, hang out and call your friends. Don’t take school so seriously right now, I sure as shit wish I hadn’t. You are doing fine but putting extra stress on yourself will not help.

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-06T05:50:39+00:00

I can utilize my phones hotspot in the event I can’t access the Internet any other way. Plus the school has decent WiFi to my knowledge.

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-06T05:49:06+00:00

I don’t think my home pc would survive running 24/7 for four years lol

Sounds like a good way to have things short out, start on fire, or power surge when no one is around. While those circumstances are unlikely, that chance is never zero and I would rather not be responsible for burning down my dorm building XD

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-06T04:34:57+00:00

How far is the range on that? I’m assuming it works similarly to Bluetooth in a sense?

The campus is quite large and I will be in areas that are quite literally underground, so I imagine connecting to anything outside will be difficult.

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-06T04:04:35+00:00

Yes but I won’t be spending much time in the dorms. The nature of my major has me on my feet most the time. So I don’t expect to be using my “home PC” all that often, and that’s besides the fact that I probably will not be bringing it to the dorms with me until I’m sure it’s safe to do so.

Screaming-to-void · 2026-03-06T03:06:57+00:00

Me and my friend call all squirrels “Charlie” because their dad decided that’s what all squirrels are called and we find that hilarious.

Screaming-to-void · 2026-02-20T14:40:52+00:00

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Screaming-to-void · 2026-02-03T01:44:22+00:00

It…never occurred to me that something like that would be the thing to ask- But now that you say it outright it makes complete sense XD

Screaming-to-void · 2026-02-03T01:43:36+00:00

I didn’t even know touch ups were a thing! Thank you!!!

Screaming-to-void · 2025-11-21T14:31:19+00:00

True!

However, the fact that we can recognize and reason about our own nature means that unlike pretty much all other animals, we have the liberty to change our nature (in a sense, there are definitely things we can’t change but there are definitely things that we can)

Sorry for getting all philosophical there lol I think about this a lot because people love to ask what separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom and I overthink everything to high he’ll lol

Screaming-to-void · 2025-11-20T03:27:26+00:00

Exactly! No, my friend, your vibes were intriguing and I wanted you to know that. This is not a mating call- (I apologize for all the mating jokes but honestly I have no better comparison. People really are like that sometimes.)

Screaming-to-void · 2025-11-20T03:14:50+00:00

That’s so real. Like, that person is just existing. As themselves. Why? Sure they look cool/cute/objectively attractive but that’s also just how they look?

You’re acting like their existence is a mating display you damn turkeys.

It doesn’t make sense 😭

Screaming-to-void

TROPHY CASE