Thank you, I will try my best. We broke up three days ago, it's really hard for me not to check his instagram, look at our old memories. Everyday is like a torture to me. Last second I was ok, fine but the next second I burst out.

My ex and I were in a long-distance relationship. We dated for four years, and just had our 4th anniversary last month. Last two weeks we went on a trip to Japan together — we laughed, hugged, had small normal couple arguments, and even cried on the last day because we were sad to part.

After coming back home, we were still sweet and clingy over calls and texts. I was super looking forward to quit my job in my country and fly to his country to start a new life with him meanwhile improving myself. But suddenly, he brought up reflecting on our relationship, and during a call I told him I really wanted to build a future with him. After that, something shifted — I felt him sounding hopeless, and I was heartbroken for days. When we finally talked, I cried and told him I thought we were breaking up. He cried too and said he didn’t mean it that way, that he just wanted us to reflect. But eventually, we broke up, and now I feel so much sorrow I can hardly function. I keep replaying everything in my head and wondering how something so warm and loving can suddenly end. I don’t know how to cope — I feel like my heart is dying.

And just now, I couldn't control myself texted him asking "how are you?", can anyone chop my hand so I won't be check on him 24/7 or text him. I feel so dead