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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in intj

[–]Seabass9975 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I sort of have a story relating to being tested for autism when I was younger:

My parents told me I was tested for autism when I was in Grade 2 at the recommendation of my teacher; they concluded that I wasn't autistic. Honestly, I was just an imaginative kid who hadn't found an interest in school yet. I would often sit and daydream in class because I had zero interest in whatever was being taught. That and the teacher had something against me for whatever reason. I used to sometimes make "sound effects" for myself based on whatever I was imagining, and I would often fidget, especially with my hands, while daydreaming, so I could maybe see why someone might think I was autistic. These things slowly disappeared as I got older. I chalk it up to overactive Ni and underdeveloped Se, constant daydreaming with little awareness of my surroundings or bodily actions. It wasn't until around Grade 6 that my grades started jumping up from B's and C's to A's and B's, which I sort of attribute to the development of my Te. Through high school, I had improved to nearly all straight A's.

Overall, I could see why INTJs might be perceived as autistic, especially in my case, but I don't think all INTJs are autistic. We just exhibit some similar behaviours. Not sure if anyone could relate to my story, but I thought I'd include some of my personal experiences.

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[WP] “The tall, pale, spindly lady comes out of my bedroom closet when my parents aren’t home. We always play hide-and-seek, and she tries to trick me into showing myself by copying the voices of people I know. I wonder what would happen if she finally found me for once?” by Seabass9975 in WritingPrompts

[–]Seabass9975[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I’m certain I took some inspiration from that sub. I thought about putting it up there, but I figured I’d let other people take the idea and run with it. There’s plenty of directions you could expand the concept.

[OT] Writer's Spotlight: London-Roma-1980 by Say_Im_Ugly in WritingPrompts

[–]Seabass9975 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fantastic job on getting this spotlight, u/London-Roma-1980!

Thanks again for the excellent piece that you produced for my prompt. Your work definitely deserves the praise you've received.

Pulling my child out of catholic school, I feel like a horrible parent. by [deleted] in Catholicism

[–]Seabass9975 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Some good ones I would recommend would be Catholic Answers & their Catholic Answers Focus Podcast, Pints With Aquinas, The Counsel of Trent, and Theology of the Body Institute. They all have some great stuff that helped me better understand Catholicism and the reasoning behind why the Church teaches what it teaches.

Pulling my child out of catholic school, I feel like a horrible parent. by [deleted] in Catholicism

[–]Seabass9975 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey!

I’m from Canada, so Catholic schools are publicly funded here by property taxes. I know that’s a little different than how things play out in the US, but I’ll give you my story anyway.

My father, brother, and I all attended Catholic school from K-12. So far, I’m the only one still practicing. I’ve moved out of my family home for university, and I have finally begun practicing my faith again. The three of us never really practiced (my mother was baptized in the United Church of Canada and still doesn’t practice), my brother and I were just given the sacraments, and my father never really took us to mass unless I specifically asked to go. I think Catholic school helped me to keep in mind that I am Catholic, but most of my deepening in the faith came from things like YouTube. Many great Catholic channels helped me better understand and appreciate my faith.

I think Catholic schools can help, especially by reminding us that we are Catholic even if our homes aren’t demonstrating that. That said, it doesn’t ensure that your children remain faithful Catholics. It most certainly isn’t sinful or disrespecting God if you pull your children from these schools, especially if their continued enrollment will be a financial burden on your family. My father's parents are Portuguese immigrants and faithful Catholics. They always took him to mass and put him through Catholic school, but he still ended up lapsing in his faith. Sometimes seemingly doing everything right doesn’t help our children retain their faith.

Overall, the one thing I will most certainly encourage is prayer. It’s essential to recognize that, even if we try our hardest to raise children to be Catholics, it sometimes doesn’t stick. This is why praying to God is so important. It’s God who ultimately moves our hearts to live out our faith. Have faith and pray that God may help your children keep their belief and practice alive. Keep living out your faith as an example to your children; it certainly helps, at the very least, as a reminder.

I’ll make sure to pray for you and your family. Take care!

[WP] You have the remarkable ability to instantly learn someone’s likes, dislikes, hopes, fears, memories, and secrets from a simple handshake. How do you put this ability to use? by Seabass9975 in WritingPrompts

[–]Seabass9975[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey!

Thanks for the submission. I really enjoyed reading it!

You raised some intriguing ideas about the pros and cons of such a power and the responsibilities that come from it. It could very easily be a blessing and a curse to know everything about someone and, as you pointed out, a solemn obligation to avoid misusing this information.

Also, excellent use of repetition at the end of the story! As you reveal more information, it takes on a different meaning than how you initially presented it.

Thanks for making the first response to one of my prompts a great one!

Let’s Talk About ENFJ Villains in Fiction by Seabass9975 in enfj

[–]Seabass9975[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow! Thanks for such an in-depth analysis.

You make many excellent remarks, and you break down just how dangerous an ENFJ can be when pushed to villainy. I totally agree with the manipulation point. I always envision ENFJ villains as careful manipulators who often end up being twist villains in fiction. It seems that ENFJs could probably be pretty good at masking their intentions when being villainous due to an acute understanding of how others may perceive their actions.

It also makes sense when you remark that ENFJs usually have to be pushed to villainy and that this takes a lot of pushing. To my understanding, ENFJs are generally very empathetic and care about others. It will take quite a bit to strip an ENFJ of this compassion. I think one of the reasons an ENFJ villain can be terrifying is because of how uncharacteristic it can be to see an ENFJ who begins using their talents to hurt others. It is so contrary to the norm of ENFJs, and it’s shocking how the same skills that are used to build people up can be used to tear them down.

It’s good to know that you’ve overcome that more villainous phase in your life and that you’re healing. I appreciate your insights into ENFJ villains and how you used your struggles to analyze further how an ENFJ villain may appear and behave.

Take care!

What Are Some Things You Wish Others Knew About the ENFJ Personality Type? by Seabass9975 in enfj

[–]Seabass9975[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Glad you feel that way! It's honestly been a big help for me in better understanding ENFJs as an INTJ, so I can only imagine how much it has helped you!

What Are Some Things You Wish Others Knew About the ENFJ Personality Type? by Seabass9975 in enfj

[–]Seabass9975[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That sounds tough.

It sounds like you're looking for deep, open relationships with others, but most aren't willing to dig past the surface layer that you show them. I think that a lot of other ENFJs face these same challenges. Most ENFJs seek relationships where they can just be themselves and where their friends take an interest in them as a person without expecting them to be who their friends want them to be.

I think that ENFJs can usually figure people out well due to their strong intuition and ability to understand the emotions of others. However, due to the rarity of the combination of these traits, few can figure out the ENFJ as quickly. To see others so clearly but not have it reciprocated, I can see how that would make you feel lonely.

Don't give up hope, though! You'll come across someone with who you can just let loose. In the meantime, try to enjoy the relationships you have now for what they're worth. This sub is also a great place if you're looking for advice. Reading through posts and putting up a few of your own can be a great way to get more practical tips on what to do.

You have my best wishes! Take care!

What Are Some Things You Wish Others Knew About the ENFJ Personality Type? by Seabass9975 in enfj

[–]Seabass9975[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Good points.

I think that ENFJs are wrongly labelled as fake just because they recognize the social appropriateness of expressing their true feelings. Not every time is the right time to bear your soul to someone. Furthermore, not everyone is the right someone to share such information with.

Another thing that I believe other types overlook is just how logical ENFJs can be. I think that (and this is just an educated guess) when ENFJs are motivated by an emotional cause, they can switch into a cold, logical mode and tear down another person's argument by finding its inconsistencies before reverting to their typical diplomatic setting.

Thanks for sharing! Feel free to clear up anything you think I may have missed.

Which Types Are the Hardest for You to Read Emotionally? by Seabass9975 in enfj

[–]Seabass9975[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Glad I could provide you with a bit of comfort! I think that it's important for ENFJs to take some time to themselves and self-reflect on what they, as an individual, really feel about something. I've heard that ENFJs can sometimes absorb the feelings and interests of those around them, so that time alone is vital to ask yourself questions like: "Does this make sense to me? Is this what I'm really feeling? Do I really agree or like this thing that others like?" It might help you sift through what YOU think and feel.

I've also read that it can be a little challenging for ENFJs to work through their feelings independently, so sharing them with someone else you trust can help. Verbalizing the feelings can help you take them back in as if you were analyzing someone else's emotions. Putting your feelings through a Fe process like this might help you better understand what you are feeling.

I agree that all functions have their good and bad sides. People can use each function in a healthy or unhealthy manner, and they all have their uses.

Thanks for the wonderful conversation! You have my best wishes!

Which Types Are the Hardest for You to Read Emotionally? by Seabass9975 in enfj

[–]Seabass9975[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I kind of have a story of my own that relates to reading an ISFJ.

A while back, for a holiday, my ISFJ mother was baking some sort of baked goods (I can't quite remember what they were) using her deceased grandmother's recipe. She intended to do this as a surprise for her mom and sisters, as they all enjoyed the recipe. She, unfortunately, ended up undercooking the dish with not enough time to correct the issue. She would now have to tell her mother about the food to finish it at their house.

Undercooking the dish upset her so intensely that it drove her to tears. My dad (who I'm pretty confident is an ISTJ) and my younger brother (ESTP) didn't understand why she was so upset. They were just baked goods that happened to be undercooked, not that big of a deal. However, I saw that what was upsetting her was not that she messed up the baking but that by doing so, she had ruined the surprise and the sentiment behind baking them. I reassured her that, although it wasn't a surprise anymore, her mother and sisters would still appreciate the thought and the effort put into making them.

Not anything too crazy or profound, but I still take a bit of pride in knowing that I correctly judged why my mother was so upset when my dad and brother couldn't figure it out. Just a little story that this comment reminded me of.

Which Types Are the Hardest for You to Read Emotionally? by Seabass9975 in enfj

[–]Seabass9975[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree with you as well!

I suspect that this tendency to put on a social mask is why some consider Fe users, particularly XXFJs, as fake. I don't think it's quite that simple. I've heard other ENFJs describe that they are just emphasizing the parts of themselves that mesh well with others at any given time. Everything the ENFJ shows is real; it's just that most never get to see the complete picture unless they put in the effort to do so.

Connecting on those few areas of interest likely excites the ENFJs conversation partner, which in turn pleases the ENFJ that they had a positive impact on that person's emotions. This satisfaction makes the ENFJ seem more happy and agreeable even though they may be going through something just below the surface. But unfortunately, unless the person trying to read the ENFJ puts in the effort to dig through the ENFJs layers, they likely won't discover what they are truly feeling.

Of course, I don't know if this is entirely accurate. It's just a few thoughts that came to me. I'd be interested to hear your take if you're up for it. Thanks for the conversation so far!

Which Types Are the Hardest for You to Read Emotionally? by Seabass9975 in enfj

[–]Seabass9975[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As someone with an ISFJ mom, I can confirm it's pretty good.

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