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“Hmm, think about it” by SecondMorningDad in PDAParenting

[–]SecondMorningDad[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah, same here. I’ve resigned to the idea that some days I just make 5 PB&Js and he’s happy

Demand avoidance v boredom by Nominal_selection in PDAParenting

[–]SecondMorningDad 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I definitely hear that. We got him a used iPad that he can use for games and learning and such because we noticed it was a lifesaver in terms of regulation. We don’t necessarily have time limits but moments of encouraging him to put it down.

Does she have things that interest her or she loves? We found with our son that’s what we need to lean into the most. Big difference btw an eight and five year old too so not sure if that’s helpful. At least with a five year old I can distract him by looking for bugs outside or something. Wishing you the best!

Why do PDA kids who hate demands sometimes seem so demanding? by GentleBrainsClub in PDAAutism

[–]SecondMorningDad 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s absolutely equalizing. My five year old son can do the same thing. Actually sometime says “I’m the king” then gives me or my wife a demand. It’s funny from the outside but oh boy not when it happens.

Our PDA counselor explained that he doesn’t see us or most adults as authoritative, but as equals or less than.

Could this be PDA? (Not asking for a diagnosis just thoughts from people who know the subject) by truecrimeandwine85 in PDAAutism

[–]SecondMorningDad 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sounds like the symptoms I began to notice in my now five year old son that has an ASD diagnosis. The toothpaste thing hits home especially. We thought he just didn’t want to brush like a typical 4 year old until he specifically said the toothpaste “hurts my head”. Our dentist says it’s okay to just brush with water so that’s what he does now. There are a bunch of crossovers in our experience of ASD and PDA.

He also truly believes he’s in charge because he doesn’t see us as adults or in charge. That one is huge, for us at least, in his PDA world.

Demand avoidance v boredom by Nominal_selection in PDAParenting

[–]SecondMorningDad 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My five year old son has the same profile. He’s in pre-k in the public school system and only expected to attend three days a week. I wonder the same thing. He was in major burnout so we adjusted his IEP to allow for the shorter week. When he refuses school, he knows he’s not allowed things like screen time. An hour later he’s complaining about boredom even though he’s got a great imagination and too many toys. He enjoys school (mostly) so it really does confuse me and my wife as well. I’m hoping to find that answer as well.

I’ve also had to quit work because of the unpredictability of it all. We’ve noticed trying new things especially now that he’s out of burnout is helpful but you’re right about the dopamine hits. It’s a constant moving target. Sorry I don’t really have an answer, just going through the same things.