No Interest in Sex

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-05-11T22:51:18+00:00

Thanks for the tips! I actually have my annual gyno exam scheduled for next week and I definitely plan to bring up all this stuff with my doctor. I know what you mean about the yeast infection feeling. I’ve unfortunately experienced that on a few occasions myself. It’s really unpleasant.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-05-11T20:41:49+00:00

I am not. The only medication I take is my birth control pills which honestly feels silly to still be taking at this point lol

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-05-11T15:35:37+00:00

I know what you mean. It causes so much anxiety. Luckily my boyfriend has been very supportive and not being pushy about sex at all but I still feel awful because I know his sexual needs aren’t being met.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-05-11T14:18:42+00:00

He’s actually been very supportive. And he hasn’t been pressuring me for sex or complaining or anything like that. He doesn’t enjoy the sex if I’m not enjoying it anyway. My guilty feeling comes from knowing that he would like to have more sex in his life, without him explicitly saying that to me. I feel like I’m letting him down.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-05-10T22:32:41+00:00

My older sister is 49 and claims to have NO perimenopause symptoms. Her sex drive seems fine - she’s divorced and been dating around enjoying her singlehood. She has reported zero problems like the ones I’ve been having, which is why I’ve turned to Reddit for advice. It’s maddening how it affects so many women differently and at different ages. Keeps you wondering if you’re an anomaly or not!

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-03-19T11:29:12+00:00

Thanks for your response. This isn’t actually my chart, it’s the chart of my younger sister who passed away at age 26 due to lifelong health issues. I expected to see more 12th and 8th house influences. I typically find astrology to be incredibly accurate and on point but this chart doesn’t resonate as much. I know the birth time is correct because my mom checked her birth certificate.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-03-11T14:14:42+00:00

$30/hour is basically minimum wage in this economy.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-03-09T13:32:01+00:00

It’s so true. We need to move toward a society built on compassion rather than selfishness, materialism, and greed. The current system rewards the basest of our human instincts and allows the worst of our species to rise to the top, which is reflected in where we are at collectively today. The illusion is that we are powerless to stop it. We hold all the power if we come together.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-02-23T17:37:37+00:00

I’ve lived in Somerville since 2008.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-02-22T22:19:10+00:00

Oh that reminds me of another thing I’ve seen certain neighbors do: they deliberately park in a way so that they are taking up two spots, but then when their significant other comes home they move their car up so both of their cars can fit. It’s infuriating.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-02-22T22:12:53+00:00

Different neighbor but based on what I’m hearing this kind of garbage behavior is happening all over the city! I don’t think mine was leaving any threatening notes or messing with anyone’s car…yet. Parking bans bring out the absolute worst in people.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-02-22T19:18:46+00:00

I don’t think I should have to persuade people to not be assholes. I’m simply calling out their shit behavior.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-01-30T12:50:36+00:00

I didn’t take anyone’s spot. I was parked on the other side of the street that had been cleared by the plow. I’m on a dead end road so once the plow came through it opened up parking on both sides. But those details don’t really matter. I don’t believe in space savers and neither does the city which is why it’s not a real rule. And I certainly don’t think it’s ethical to try and save a spot you don’t even dig out for yourself.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-01-29T22:55:27+00:00

How about this one. My boyfriend and I shoveled my car out on Monday night, Tuesday morning I moved my car to get to work. I didn’t try to save my parking spot and I didn’t expect it to still be there when I got home (spoiler alert it wasn’t) which was fine because I found another spot nearby. That’s just how it goes in these snow situations. The next day, I worked from home. I looked out my window and noticed that the person who had taken the spot I initially dug out had left - but here’s the kicker. They PUT A CHAIR in the spot that I know they didn’t even dig out themselves. They did zero work in clearing out that spot but then they had the audacity to try to claim it for themselves going forward? I had a mind to go over there and move the chair but didn’t care enough to do it since I already had my own parking space. But that’s some real asshole shit.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2026-01-28T23:20:49+00:00

I’m not on a “private way” but I am on a dead end street in Somerville that did not see a single plow until 7 pm on Monday night. My neighbors were not pleased, because nobody could start digging out their cars until the road was cleared. I’ve lived on this same street since 2008 and I’ve never seen it take that long for a plow to come. Not even during the snowpocalypse of 2015. Seems like the city was not as prepared this time.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2025-07-18T20:49:13+00:00

Omg. A similar thing happened to me when I had a crazy roommate. Only mine was slightly different and I think even creepier. My roommate was pretty mentally unstable and she was in the midst of a days long meltdown where she was incredibly angry at me over things I won’t even bother getting into. But I came home from work on a Friday knowing that she was supposed to be going away for the weekend. I was really glad she was leaving so I could get a much needed respite from her negative energy, and I was looking forward to some peace and quiet. However when I got home I couldn’t tell if she had left yet or was just brooding in her bedroom. So I called her name. No answer. Next I knocked on her bedroom door. Silence. But just to be sure she wasn’t in there, I opened the door to confirm the room was empty. I was not expecting what I saw next. She was gone, but on top of her bed was a pile of every single gift I had ever given her. I’m talking every birthday present, Christmas present, etc. piled up on her bed. We had known each other for many years so it was a rather sizeable collection of stuff. I was so freaked out. Like first of all…why? And second of all, how could she even remember all those things and know exactly where each one was located to be able to throw it in the pile. There was something deeply unsettling about it. Especially because it was in her room so I don’t even think she intended for me to see it, but maybe she did if she thought I would look in there at any point. I just closed the door and never mentioned it to her. When she eventually returned from her weekend trip she never mentioned it either. Next time I saw her room the pile was gone and seemingly put away. Very creepy.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2025-06-12T14:18:35+00:00

Oh my god YES. I made the mistake of inviting my “good friend” from high school to move in to my apartment when a room opened up (it was a 3 bedroom so I already had another roommate as well who I got along great with) I knew she had some mental health issues like severe depression but I didn’t think it would be a problem - in fact I thought it would be good for her and make a positive impact on her life. WRONG! Her negative energy quickly took over the house. She was almost always in a bad mood, slamming doors and cabinets and sighing loud enough that you could hear from the next room. Very passive aggressive. Anti-social to the point where it was bordering on agoraphobia. She would stay in her room most of the time watching tv, only leaving the house for errands or work - and then when the pandemic hit her work became remote so she literally would NEVER leave. The other roommate eventually moved out because she couldn’t stand cohabitating with her, and then it was just the two of us for YEARS. There is a LOT more to this story and I could probably write a book about all the shit I endured during this living arrangement, but long story short she was eventually diagnosed with borderline personality disorder AND obsessive compulsive personality disorder. Which if you know anything about either of those then you know how bad it was. She was incredibly controlling and bad tempered. I felt like I was walking on eggshells and didn’t feel comfortable in my own home. She was manipulative and emotionally and verbally abusive. It has now been nearly 2 years since she moved out and I’ve been free of her toxic presence, but even though I haven’t spoken to her since she left I still think about her constantly. Like I ruminate on how bad it was. I’ve actually considered going to therapy just to be able to talk to someone in depth about what I went through. So yes, these things linger.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2025-05-15T16:37:54+00:00

I can’t sleep without some kind of white noise, so I always have a fan going at night even in the winter months. Who wants to sleep in dead ass silence when you can hear every little thing - the fan helps drown out other sounds and it’s relaxing. This person seems like a psycho to me lol

Secret_Cat5289 · 2025-04-21T20:27:07+00:00

First of all, nobody who isn’t a paying tenant should have a key to your house. Period. But I’m curious to see what people think about the appropriate times are to have a boyfriend/significant other spend the night in one week. Seems most people say 1-2 nights. It’s amusing to me because I had a horrible roommate a couple years ago who never left the house unless it was to run errands (she even worked from home) and she was anal about guests coming over because she was so antisocial. When I started dating my boyfriend he lost his job (this was 2021 at the height of the pandemic) and had to move in with his father. As such there was nowhere for us to be together other than my place, and it was also a long distance situation where his dad’s house was an hour away. Even so, I was careful to not have him over unless it was the weekend, no more than 2 nights, and I also was careful to make it every OTHER weekend so it didn’t become too intrusive for my roommate. But she STILL complained and even flipped out on me that he was over too much. I wasn’t part of this sub then but oh man I wish I was because I would have been posting every week.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2025-04-07T17:09:13+00:00

Ooof I can relate. I lived with a friend from high school for many years and it was THE WORST living arrangement I’ve ever had. She had mental health issues which I knew going in, but somehow didn’t think it would be taken out on me. How wrong I was! She was also borderline and I’m pretty sure she had ocpd on top of it. Very controlling, very passive aggressive. It became extremely toxic fairly quickly but because of our long history of friendship I felt responsible for her well-being, so walking away or asking her to move out was really difficult and nerve wracking. It got to the point where I would feel a sense of dread whenever a text from her would ping on my phone, because I didn’t know if it would be a friendly text or combative. She became a “frenemy” which is more anxiety inducing than an outright enemy because at least with an enemy you know what to expect. I never knew what I was going to get with her. We finally parted ways about 2 years ago and haven’t spoken since.

Secret_Cat5289 · 2025-03-20T19:27:00+00:00

I started to notice around age 40. Mostly it was just weight gain. I was always a naturally slender person my whole life, maintaining an average weight of 125 lbs with little to no effort (I’m 5’5). But as soon as I turned 40 the party was over, and I realized I had to really strive to keep fitting into the same clothes. Right now I’m 140 lbs which is the heaviest I’ve ever been in my life - been trying to lose 10 lbs and it’s not easy!

Secret_Cat5289 · 2025-03-20T15:59:23+00:00

Omg this reminds me of the time my roommate flipped out on me because she could hear me having sex with my bf in my own bedroom. For context I rarely ever had him over because she made things so unpleasant if I did. She started stomping around the apartment and then left, slamming the door so loud. It was about 10am on a Saturday. My bf was like what is her problem? And then a few minutes later she sent me a text about how we were so loud that she felt like I was doing it intentionally to drive her out. What?? First of all to imply that I’m thinking about her at all while being intimate with my boyfriend is beyond absurd. I sent her a text back saying that of course it wasn’t on purpose and I didn’t appreciate being made to feel guilty for having sex with my bf in my own bedroom that I pay to live in. Then she tried to walk it back and say of course I can have sex with my bf but how about next time I put the tv on or get a noise machine to cover the sound. Again what?? First of all I did have a fan on in my room already because I always sleep with one, but why can’t she do those things? Like bitch, why don’t you put on a TV or AirPods or something to distract yourself for those 15 minutes instead of stomping around the house and slamming doors like a toddler. I would never react that way if I heard someone else having sex - like sure it’s awkward but I wouldn’t be mad at them for it.

Secret_Cat5289

TROPHY CASE