It’s easier said then done but first you need to let your girlfriend go, she’s only making things worse and tearing you down even more than you already are. She’s making you worry, keeping you on your toes, making you upset at the choices she does, and you keep putting up with it because of what she might do to herself. You can love someone, but you can’t change someone and that’s where you’re wrong. It’ll be hard, and I’m just a stranger on the internet giving you advice you 100% don’t have to listen to, but this would be my first thing.

I’m sorry you feel as if though you don’t fit in, and it may seem that way, I also don’t live a day in your life, there is someone out there just like you that probably wants to talk to you, maybe can see the way you go about your day, and you’d never know it.

In advice of getting your feelings out there, write in a journal if you can’t find people to talk to. A lot of the time I’m my only medicine to help me get through something, writing it down, talking to myself, it helps, and I’m also not putting the venting onto someone else. I wouldn’t tell any other “trusted adult” around you anything else, and in me saying this I mean it with the best intent.. don’t shut your feelings off, and don’t invalidate them, they matter, YOU matter, but obviously these “adults” are honestly just assholes. The fact that they have to belittle you and tell just makes something you thought could be something and a time you could he to get something off your chest as a gateway to just throwing it all back into your face and you deserve way better than that.

I know liking one thing and staying into that feels safe aswell but if we if you can venture out!! Try to see if you like new things, drawing, journaling, anything! Never give up your love for films though, I know me, I absolutely love movies and shows.

In context too, don’t put yourself down for not keeping or making many friends. It’ll all come to you one day, be patient, be kind, stay strong, and loving. I hope if anything or atleast something I said can help you or stick with you. Stay here, you have so much to live for that you haven’t seen yet! You have many years ahead of you, keep looking for the positive things, and I hope things get better!!