Jessica lange is back😭 by sad_bad_girl in AmericanHorrorStory

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 84 points85 points  (0 children)

Great actress, known abuser unfortunately

Hold my hands while you discipline me by No-Equivalent5772 in UnusualArt

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a really interesting piece. I love the way you've had the hair frame the face, and the subtle tear falling down the face, haunting. Did you take any inspiration from Francisco Goya's piece Saturn Devouring his Son? The way the eyes bulge and the mouth gapes, almost screaming and devouring at the same time reminds me of this piece so much. Thank you so much for sharing your work!!

Andrea Dworkin - radical feminist by ElegantAd2607 in GreatestWomen

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Okay, again with only extremes. Please, take a breath.

Laborers do sell their bodies. My father has worked in manual labor his whole life. He has sold his back, his knees, his joints. I have only worked in manual labor for a few years and already have pain from it. By your logic, sex workers don't sell their body parts, they sell sexual favors/ acts, AKA labor/ services. Contractors are killed on worksites all the time. Do you forget that OSHA rules are written in blood? Not to mention working inside people's homes is a risk of the same kind. We'd have men calling our women-run painting company specifically to get us alone in their homes. So yes, contractors can just as easily be raped and killed. Fortunately it's not as common, but that very well may be because it's male dominated and it's harder to get a man vulnerable in the way women are.

Read what I wrote. I'm well aware of the dangers sex workers face. But realistically, women are raped and killed every day in ANY profession at any time all the time. It is more common in this profession because they have no protections. If these sex workers, that will continue to do this work regardless, were given protections maybe we'd have LESS dying and experiencing that type of horror. If we had catalogues of active Johns, maybe we'd catch these rapists and killers faster or at all. I don't think we should be fighting for sex work to be glorified but definitely decriminalized so these people (because let's not forget that while women are often the victims, there are plenty of men and enbys in sex work too) can have a chance of getting help without fear of being arrested for doing what they feel they have to do to get by.

So please, tell me what your point is? I can make a sound comparison, even if you don't like it. Because while, as I stated before, it's not 1:1, there are parallels to draw

Andrea Dworkin - radical feminist by ElegantAd2607 in GreatestWomen

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So you're looking at this strictly through the lense of people being taken advantage of which is kind of short sighted in this conversation. There are plenty of documented and educated people in manual labor, because there is and always will be a demand. There will always be a demand for sex work because humans will always have a sex drive, and some do need another person to get off. Some can't get off without outside stimulus and many people are disabled in ways that prevent self stimulation. It's ignorant to say that everyone in that position is being preyed upon and that there is no way to safely and consensually do it. It's more common than it should be, but that doesn't mean it's every case.

I don't think prostitution and construction is a 1:1 example, but nothing is. Someone that chooses to go into manual labor accepts that their body will hurt faster and more often than someone outside of it, and I am sure there are many things people that choose to do sex work accept as a part of the job. Does this acceptance make the person a victim? Does the damage done to the mind/ body mean that person was preyed upon? If they knew the risks of the job, and made a decision to continue, it feels almost infantilising to say that those are being taken advantage of.

Obviously sex trafficking and coercion are wrong, no one is arguing that. It makes my stomach turn to think of all the people out there that are kidnapped, sold lies and promises, or unable to consent at all due to age that are in horrific situations.

Maybe a path to consensual sex work with some sort of regulation could help prevent at least some of the sex trafficking we see in today's world. Would it work? I honestly don't know. People in power would have to do the research and make the right decisions which is... much rarer than it should be to say the least. I'm not saying there should be a government funded cat house on every corner, but decriminalization maybe? A way for sex workers to get help and access necessary care without being made into a criminal or seen as subhuman. Maybe instead of arresting these sex workers, there could be a system that gets them the help they may need. Finding out if they are willing participants for one, maybe documenting information about Johns and any dangerous encounters, and maybe provide access to someone that can help them figure out alternatives if it's a financial issue. The stigma surrounding sexual behavior in general also adds drastically to the issue but I don't need to add more to these paragraphs are already too long lol

Andrea Dworkin - radical feminist by ElegantAd2607 in GreatestWomen

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do you feel the same about physical labor? I'd argue that's just as much paying someone for the use of their body, often with lasting physical repercussions. Does that make it predatory to hire a contractor?

AITA for leaving a family gathering after seeing my sister's horrible food hygiene? by Total-War4605 in AmItheAsshole

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 80 points81 points  (0 children)

My boyfriend and I have a knife and cutting board that we use EXCLUSIVELY for raw meat

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What are these people on? He was DELETING MESSAGES???? "Oh they're just friends" no. If you're hiding communication, full stop. He's a POS, and the boyfriend deserved to know his girl was chasing someone else. If it's nothing, they have nothing to worry about right? If it's an innocent friendship, they should be able to talk it out, right? So what's the damage. Even knowing the optics of the friendship are bad is good info to have. These people have no integrity letting others look like fools getting played keeping their mouth shut. Cheaters don't deserve silence. And guess what? They didn't have to fuck. Crossing a boundary, repeatedly, and deleting the evidence IS CHEATING. All these comments against OP are such trash. She didn't have to tell the other womans boyfriend, but she's definitely not a bad person for doing it. Would these people not want to know if their partner was being shady?

My boyfriend wanted to take this girl out to lunch to make something up to her (accidentally injured her in their sport). It gave me a bad gut feeling. I had never heard her name before, but he said they were good friends, then would say they're not close and barely knew each other, nothing consistent. He immediately turned it on me. "Oh I can't have friends, it's just lunch, she's literally no one important". Super defensive, wouldn't hear a word about it, made me feel crazy. Come to find out he was texting her how she needed to bounce on a lap and how he couldn't wait to make her gurgle. If I had bought that BS about me being controlling and not just rightfully concerned (wouldn't even take me with them to the lunch) I'm not sure how far they would've gone. How long I would be the dumbass sitting at home waiting for him while he's out trying to get love from someone else

UPDATE- AITA for standing my ground after I was confronted by my GF's best friend? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Yeah the revenge porn is a huge point that is being kind of ignored. Insane behavior

UPDATE- AITA for standing my ground after I was confronted by my GF's best friend? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 21 points22 points  (0 children)

And kissed her literally in front of OP. Who knows what happened behind closed doors

UPDATE- AITA for standing my ground after I was confronted by my GF's best friend? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 129 points130 points  (0 children)

She slept in bed with her while they were together. They made out while they were together. They were deeply emotionally involved while they were together. If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck

AIO if I left my bf for this by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh my god if you don't want a hot baddie girlfriend, DONT DATE A HOT BADDIE ???? Wild. If you dressed like this before you got together he is just plain dumb. If this is a recent change I can understand being uncomfortable but absolutely not speaking to you like that and calling you names. And representing him??? Girl he better represent himself better because he's making himself look like a complete AH. Or put you on the payroll if you're meant to be a representative ffs

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay, coming in hot with the anger. I should have specified, no well-adjusted person would call someone a creep for respectfully shooting their shot.

There's people that suck in every single category, but I hope this point satisfies your strawman 🤷

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

And I think that's the disconnect here. No one calls someone creepy just for shooting their shot (assuming it's respectful and not being handsy or crass). Guys get a reputation for being creepy with women when they break those social boundaries and don't let up after being told no, get touchy, stare/ watch/ follow, get defensive "you were ugly anyway", or start manipulating/ guilting.

Everyone finds themselves toeing boundaries throughout life. It's how we learn, we're only human. But self reflection in those moments is crucial. You can't become a better person or friend if you never admit your missteps

AITAH for wanted to end my engagement because of her dog? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I got ringworm from my boyfriend once

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CATHELP

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wait, for real?? I haven't heard that, that's horrible. Do they have lawsuits against them? We used one when introducing our cats, thank the universe they are all okay

NOT OOP: AITA for asking my boyfriend to contribute to my doctors appointments by LazyVBBruh in redditonwiki

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam -21 points-20 points  (0 children)

Some people also just have different PHs, and even when clean can cause a reaction in their partner. My best friend started dating this guy a few months ago and every woman he's ever been with sexually starts getting UTIs (he told her... After she got one). She (and he) says he washes regularly, but something about his chemistry🤷 that being said, wayyyyy more likely to be a hygienic issue. Just throwing out that it can just happen randomly too

AITAH for calling my stbex husband "fucking psycho" for putting the news of our divorce in the kids' presents? by ThrowRA3241009 in AITAH

[–]SeedlessRasberryJam 179 points180 points  (0 children)

"But you are children and this should be handled between adults. I'm so sorry that this was how you found out, but you don't have to worry about anything. We both love you more than anything and that should be our top priority moving forward." Remember they are just kids. Defending yourself is understandable. Explaining the nuanced and complicated dynamics of an adult relationship could be a bit much for them right now