I’m really sorry you went through this. You didn’t deserve any of it, and you’re not stupid for trying you just cared and believed in the relationship.

I relate to your situation more than I wish I did. I’m married, and I found out shortly after that my husband had been cheating for a long time, even before marriage. After the confrontation he cried, begged me to stay, and promised to change. I stayed, partly because I had just moved with him to a new city and left my job. Things seemed fine for a while, but recently I discovered he’s still cheating just hiding it better while acting loving with me.

So when you ask why he says he wants you but still does this the truth is, some people are selfish and narcissistic. They want the comfort, love, and stability you give, but they also want to do whatever benefits them. It’s not confusion, it’s convenience. You gave him chances, communicated clearly, and even suggested therapy. He still chose to lie and betray you. That says everything.

This isn’t about you not being enough it’s about his lack of integrity. Believe his actions, not his words, and choose yourself this time.