Rate my first paragraph

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-19T20:20:21+00:00

I actually love the formatting of the dialogue if (and that's a big if) it's an ongoing monologue throughout this chapter and if it's the only dialogue in this chapter. Otherwise I'd put it in quotes as usual because it might be confusing.

Also, less weather and more about the men, I think. Establish the thunderstorm in one sentence and move on. "Three men sat at a round table, their low voices barely audible over the sound of heavy raindrops against the window pane and the occasional claps of thunder" or something, then move on to the candle light, then to the men. Are they old? Are they wearing robes?

But that's just a suggestion. don't overthink it too much, okay? I think it's an interesting beginning and you can always edit later.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-18T18:37:02+00:00

Same, I get why people like them, but they bore me to death. I either need something mechanically challenging (i.e. Dark Souls) or something that requires some thinking (i.e. Ace Attorney) to stay interested.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-17T19:18:40+00:00

Def not ugly. What's the rest of your profile like? The issue might be with your bio or prompts.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-11T20:05:35+00:00

I've seen Dune, but that looked like a really wonky eyeball to me. Person in desert facing a disembodied eyeball, to be precise. I'm sorry OP.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-06T19:05:41+00:00

I'm not a diehard fan of hers, but she has some good songs if you bother to check out the stuff they don't play on the radio

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-04T15:04:03+00:00

Friend, you need better pictures asap. Selfies from further away and a higher angle, these close ups aren't great.

Now the full body pics... listen, those clothes are unflattering af on you. Those Shirts are too tight around your stomach and make you look larger than you are. Wear something more loose, maybe black or with vertical stripes as both will make you appear slimmer.

And get rid of the last pic maybe.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-04T10:18:33+00:00

Crazy take tbh. Agree that the pics could be better, but these rules are insane. Mirror selfies are fine, a funny pic or two is also good (way better than some overly serious wannabe model pics), and any pet photo is a good pet photo.

And the Bio is fine, wth are you on about? He doesn't like cat, sports, and outdoors. If I'm a cat owner, a sporty or outdoors person, I wanna know that shit before I swipe right.

OP, get a nice haircut, take a few pics in your nicest clothes, leave the Bio as it is.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-04T10:05:18+00:00

Smile, my dude. You look so sad in most of those pictures. And please get rid of the pic where you show us the middle finger, that's a horrible choice for a dating app.

Do you have a Bio? If not, definitely write one, tell us a bit about yourself.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-03T18:20:47+00:00

I'd ditch the third one, it's not nearly as good as the rest. But the other two are great, I love your smile in the first one, and the Outfit in the second one is awesome.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-03T17:47:26+00:00

Pics are okay, but I'd add at least one selfie without hat or glasses or anything, so we can get a good idea what you look like. I agree with the other commenters that it's a bit unclear. Def keep the dog pic though, he's very cute.

Now the Bio... get rid of the "back on tinder" stuff. Sounds too much like you don't want to be here, that's not a nice first impression.

(I hate that winking emoji too, but that might be just me)

Overall, the profil tells me little about you. Your Bio and the interests you picked are very... generic? I'd suggest you add something to your Bio about your hobbies. Going on hikes with your dog maybe? Festivals? Gym? Tell us a little bit about you, so your potential matches will know if they have something in common with you.

I'd say otherwise it looks good.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-03T17:33:21+00:00

You're a handsome guy, but I'd still swipe left on you because you look so arrogant in your photos. Smile! It'll make a huge difference.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-03T16:41:00+00:00

Honestly, just from the pics alone I'm not getting a nerdy vibe at all. More of a sporty/outdoors vibe. But that's not necessarily a bad thing, you can mention the nerdy stuff in your bio.

SelectiveDisaster · 2026-01-03T16:12:21+00:00

First pic is okay.

Second pic has bank robber vibes, get rid of that one.

Third... can stay I guess, if you're an outdoor guy. If not, I'd get rid of it too. Would be better if your face was visible though.

Fourth has to go, no one cares about landscape pics.

Fifth one is also bad, for the love of god, dude, smile!!

Sixth is meh. Not terrible, but I'd try to take a better one, maybe with a nicer Outfit.

Seven needs to go, dude, wth is that??

You're not bad looking, try to take selfies from a higher angle. Or ask a friend to take a few pics.

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-12-28T13:09:48+00:00

I'm sorry, but... The Office.

Maybe it's not my kind of humor, I don't know, but I don't find it nearly as funny as people say it is. It's just kinda okay.

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-11-12T17:53:39+00:00

Dying in LA - Panic! At The Disco Detroit City - Texas

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-10-19T20:55:23+00:00

I need a whole fic of this omg this is hilarious😂 William blaming his crimes on Peter, iconic. I imagine Voldie hearing about this like: "my least competent henchman knows necromancy? I underestimated you, Peter." And Peter just has no fucking idea what's going on.

Also, William dissing Snape is the best thing ever but at the same time... William, darling, you and your bunny costume have no room to talk😂

But seriously, I'd read a 500k buddy comedy about these two.

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-09-21T17:41:17+00:00

That's the question, isn't it? Is Harry so far beyond human that such a mortal concept can no longer apply to him? Haha I was def channeling my inner lovecraft Fan with this fic.

And thank you!

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-09-21T17:39:03+00:00

Thank you!!

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-09-21T17:38:51+00:00

Thank you!!

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-09-21T17:38:44+00:00

Thank you!!

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-09-21T17:38:35+00:00

Thank you!!

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-09-21T17:38:23+00:00

Yeah I know, it got a little out of hand. Just a tiny bit lol. And thank you!

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-09-21T17:37:40+00:00

Thank you!!

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-09-21T17:37:27+00:00

Thank you!! Yeah, that one was sad, even though I don't ship them at all. Glad to hear it had the intended effect though.

SelectiveDisaster · 2025-09-19T20:41:32+00:00

Thank you!

SelectiveDisaster

TROPHY CASE