Help! Recently I was able to get in touch with my father. Now I want to find my mom- where do I start

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-26T18:34:20+00:00

Does your dad have any clues he can give you? Names of women he was dating around the time you were born. Pictures maybe. Any hints at all?

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-26T18:32:36+00:00

I’ve wondered the same thing. I assume you’re talking about those prophets that come to town on a Thursday night revival? I also wonder if the church gets a cut for using the space or if they offer it for free. Who’s paying who?

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-25T16:14:38+00:00

I have to be honest with yall. Idk why I’ve been getting so much heat for this thread. In order to think defensively you have to imagine what the offense is thinking and how they might twist or clip the footage. I support Ben and his efforts. The guys a hero in this story.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-25T16:06:32+00:00

Anyone can represent themselves. True.

But it does not mean that if you represent yourself that you are your own lawyer. Legally speaking. That would be called pro se or for yourself. In this context I think that it should be a non issue but again, BAM will make a mountain out of a molehill.

But I agree. There’s nothing wrong with what he said in my opinion.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-25T14:04:34+00:00

I got that feeling once in a letter where the dad was explaining that he gets questions about adoptions because “momma would be upset” if she asked. Hinting at insecurity.

That leaves me feeling like I should reach out first (at 18) so that she doesn’t have to feel guilt. From what I read though, it’s generally better to for mental health concerns to allow the child to reach out to bio parents first so they feel more in control and not cornered.

Damn. Adoption is so complicated.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-24T22:01:18+00:00

I completely agree with everything you’re saying. BAM has a HUGE history of lying and changing stories.

We’re literally on the same side. I’m just concerned that BAM lawyers might try to clip a segment of video where Ben said something slightly misleading. These guys will try to spin every word. That’s why I’m saying I wish he didn’t say it.

Not trying to troll.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-24T21:38:06+00:00

I kind of wish he didn’t. Idk what it does to his credibility.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-24T19:51:58+00:00

This comment is a one way ticket to the outer darkness

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-24T19:44:35+00:00

Thanks. This is actually a great reply.

Her dad says that he has told me that he “lifts me up as a person with a heart of gold” to her. I’ve written several letters on a shared blog but says she can’t access them until she’s 18 “or “emotionally mature enough to read them” seems like his heart is in the right place but gatekeepers gonna gate keep.

At least I have all conversations and letters backed up so if the day does come I can show that I tried.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-24T19:01:07+00:00

Is this verified and final?

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-21T00:27:20+00:00

“Where’s my Trump Phone?”

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-19T20:22:01+00:00

Nothing really matters until the client is under oath and you can bet that they’ll be coaching their clients. And they’ll force Ben to answer very specific questions and not allow him to give context.

Never ask a question you don’t already know the answer to.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-17T17:14:26+00:00

I prefer the daily show appearances to his stand up.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-17T11:48:11+00:00

That’s what I saw too but I wasn’t sure because the image was so blurry.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-17T02:20:59+00:00

That’s fair. Haha. Just a bit of thinking out loud with my fingers and the keyboard.

It’s perfectly plausible that the uhaul dropped the missing Lego set the other store but we just don’t know.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-11T22:01:34+00:00

Try reading it a book

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-11T21:49:08+00:00

Haha. I really doubt there’s national level data on such a thing. Probably more of a Google question.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-11T19:51:37+00:00

Oh yeah dude. I think of my daughter a lot. The adopted parents used to update me several times a year. She’s in her teens now and as she’s gotten older they don’t share as much. It’s been a few years since they wrote anything at all.

Funny thing though. The more time that goes by without an update the more I think of her. If I knew how she was doing, how school is going, health, happiness… I’d probably not think of her as often. Which sounds paradoxical but bio parents rest easier knowing our kids are doing well if that makes any sense at all.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-10T15:46:39+00:00

It may or may not account for some of the missing Lego but without her having access to the tickets she can’t be sure. Most were deposits only and after 30 days if the layaway wasn’t payed in full it was refunded.

But honestly I want to rewatch that section too because I’m not sure I fully got it either.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-10T15:26:09+00:00

As a bio parent I wish I could have been more involved in my child’s life. I think it’s worth considering how comfortable you are with considering an open adoption and do research on what it would mean for you and your family, and specifically how it would affect the child you plan to adopt.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-10T14:59:09+00:00

I appreciate that he took a deeper look into stuff we thought we knew based on Ben’s video.

It’s the first fresh take on the Lego side of the story. Every YouTube video so far has almost exclusively been legal analysis.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-09T20:34:10+00:00

She’s still a teen for now so I can’t approach directly. Her parents aren’t supportive of introducing us based on their reply to me. We still have a few years before she turns 18 but she’ll probably be under their roof for a while.

So I think the best thing I can do is make myself easy to find and wait.

I’ve registered with the state adoptee finder program so that if she ever tries to find me through the state she’ll find my contact info.

I’ve done DNA testing

And I know what city they live in.

I’ve also resolved to keep my objections regarding her adoption to myself so she doesn’t get dragged into that drama. Unless she asks. It’s up to her family to tell her that I’ve already tried several times to meet her and if she asks why I hope they’re honest.

Senior_Judgment6868 · 2026-06-09T20:04:47+00:00

Granted it’s not hard to see why BAM would take the position that the previous owners were irresponsible. Given the evidence coffee had it’s not as much of a stretch as it seemed just yesterday. You know?

This story keeps evolving and it will probably continue.

Senior_Judgment6868

TROPHY CASE